I Love You Through and Through

“I love your top side.
I love your bottom side.
I love your inside.
And outside.
I love your fingers.
And toes.
Your ears.
And nose.
I love your hair and eyes.
Your giggles and cries.
I love you through and through.
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow too.”
by Bernadette Rossetti-Shustak

I read this book to you so often I no longer needed to look at the text on the page.  That was a good thing because I was too busy pointing to all the parts of you I loved and making different sing-song voices that matched all the ways I loved you.  

I love your body.  That may sound strange to most people, and even to myself before you started to try to make it something it’s not.  I love your body just the way it is.  The first moment I saw you as a tiny “blob” on the ultrasound screen, I was looking at your body.  I was looking at you.  I loved you in an instant.  I was overjoyed when I could feel your body moving in my womb.  It was a highlight the few times I could see my belly actually move showing the outside world you were there.  

It was your body that first let us know you.  During delivery, Dad saw the swirl of your hair first and it was the moment he knew he was a dad, inextricably connected to you and that he would never be the same.  When you were fully born, we just wanted to hold you, to touch you to look at you.  We were in awe of your toes and your fingers, the shape of your head, the curl of your ears, the darkness of your hair.  We talked for hours about your features and the tiniest of movements you made.  We wanted to know you.  

Caring for your body was a full-time job at first.  We wanted the best for you.  Nursing you, changing you, cleaning you, and making you comfortable were how we spent our days (and nights).  Every morning, I bathed you in our tiny sink and washed the little curls on the top of your head delighting with you over the ability of your hands to splash in the suds.  

Each new thing your body could do was cause for giant celebration.  We charted your weight, your height, your head circumference, each milestone of your body's development. We took so many pictures.  We loved you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes.  

Your body soon walked, ran, rode a bike, ran the bases, whizzed down water slides, fell, got up again, and let me put a bandage on that scraped knee. Your hands strained to learn to write your name, played tunes on the piano, pushed a lawn mower to earn your own money, broke a board at taekwondo and held your newborn siblings.

Your voice sang silly songs, cried for help, and laughed so loud my heart burst. Your mouth lost teeth and grew new ones, took ridiculously exaggerated breaths to make sure you blew out every single candle and whistled while you worked. 

I love your body. Everything about it was and is just right.  Even though you are making changes to your body, you can’t ever be a body you are not. Your body is somebody.  To me, one of the most beloved somebodies on the planet. 

Your body is precious to me. From the top of your head to the tip of your toes. I love you through and through. I love you yesterday, today, and tomorrow too.