Sister Mother

Gen X Maternal plea to Millennial daughter to protect her Gen Z siblings

To my first-born daughter,

I have witnessed since COVID the power of woke influence you have over your younger brother and sister, so I am pleading that you realize that, with this great power, comes great responsibility to protect them.

I would never deny that you are a terrific big sister, and that you are their chosen mother, but the fact that you are not a mother is why you can’t fully understand my primal protective instincts and can’t see how important it is to understand all aspects of anything that threatens your vulnerable offspring.

I must accept that you are a true believer in all things Social Justice, and I respect that you are an adult and capable of choosing whatever values you want to hold as the world culture revolves. So, I don't expect to change your mind about every worldview we see differently, but this is too important not to try and unite for the best outcome for those we both love.

Being born at the end of 60’s’, growing up in the 80’s, becoming your mother in 90’s, (then blessed twice more in 2000’s), I admit I ignorantly didn’t pay enough attention to how the world was changing. I believed I was progressive, but believing natural biology isn’t real and that we can be our own creator, is not my idea of progress.

I absolutely accept all my children unconditionally, regardless of who they love or how they present. My son can wear anything and love anyone he wants, but my red flag, mama bear, gut instinct alarm goes off when it involves a lifelong drug dependency, high possibility for serious health issues, potential early death and devastating regret.

I accept that our generational differences may be too big to bridge, and we have completely opposite views of what the future should look like, and as a result of that, my motherly guidance is not wanted or respected by any of you. So, I have no other option but to pray that God and you will protect them, by sharpening your senses on the real dangers lurking in plain sight. Meanwhile, all I can do is send you my love and light and tell you that I will always be here whenever you do want me. I will never abandon you.

My heart breaks that you choose to think that I am the greatest threat to their wellbeing, and that you must protect them from my so-called dangerous outdated perspectives. No wonder you are struggling with your own mental health burdens. I would never want to create more anxiety for you, but I am begging that you take responsibility for your influential position and truthfully ask the question “What if there is something more to it?”

I’m certain that if only you could open up to consider different perspectives, you’ll see that there is a much bigger picture. And with that new understanding you will feel a weight lifted that will greatly improve your own mental stability, and also do a great service to your younger siblings, by being fully informed, without prejudice.

I know that you are very kind and compassionate and you would never knowingly contribute to harming anyone. So, I am asking you to at least consider that these issues, especially trans identity, is not a simple black and white situation about acceptance and inclusion or breaking down oppressive barriers to progress. There are so many contractive, yet connected moving parts to this very serious issue, and as the data mounts, we are all learning more about the tragic reality of irreversible damages, suffered by gender nonconforming youth in medical care.

I am asking you to listen to the many detransitioners brave enough to speak out and to the many caring and knowledgeable professionals who are sounding alarms about their serious concerns regarding the harmful direction our society has moved. You should be aware of how the issue is unfolding and reshaping. My hope is that Canada soon takes the same direction as some other countries, stops medicalized affirmative model, and changes to a non-medicalized therapy first framework as the standards of care for Gender Dysphoria sufferers of all ages.

I am very concerned that you three, and many others, are being misguided by the so-called experts and online sources you have chosen to trust. I know that your brother is an adult and that this is his experience to navigate and I accept that I have no control over his path, but I can see that you do, your influence is heard and respected. They both trust you unconditionally. I do love how much you love each other, (I must have done something right).

When he eventually must accept truth, that biology does matter and his issues can’t be simply cured by drugs, surgery or a new name, he will need your support to be based in reality and not ideology. His struggles with identity/ mental health, managing autism or maybe deeper physiological symptoms (AGP), or understanding/accepting his sexuality, will still exist, so he needs honest support that will accept him as he is without any pressure to change anything to fit in anywhere, or disappoint anyone he looks up to, like you.