My heart breaks for every parent and/or loved one that is dealing with this anguish. I myself, am breaking down almost everyday knowing the dangers and the repercussions this will bring our children. My 24yr old son has now been on HRT for 6 years and won’t see me unless I affirm his identity which I won’t. I still proclaim my love and care for him but won’t go along with this delusion cause that is exactly what this is. I just can’t wrap my brain around it that so many people can’t see this for what it is. How did we get so many people who have been misled and misinformed. But most importantly lacking any common sense. Isn’t that really all it takes to see the dangers in this ideology? I want my son back and I want every Dr and/or person who contributed to this insanity to be held accountable. And I mean as accountable as one could be held accountable. This mass mutilation and prescribing devastating pharmaceuticals for something that can’t be changed is beyond humane or ethical.
Your beautifully written story tugged on my heart and my eyes watered. A glimpse. This is so heartbreaking. I hate the trans-cult! I am sad for you and all the other moms who have lost their child to the trans lies. You grew your child inside of you, you have a deep connection to your child that no one else will ever have. Your child knows the sound of your heart beating, as your child listened to it all day and all night as your child safely grew in your womb. Your child. Forever your child. In your case, forever your son, your beautiful, loved son. What a travesty.
I don't have kids but it breaks my heart to read the testimony of all you parents whose children have announced a trans identity. I have friends who have kids and who believe in the trans nonsense, and I just can't see how they don't see the huge risks it poses. I seem to have fallen out with one friend and his wife over this, and for their kids' sake I hope they wake up and stop playing along, even though doing so would alienate them from their 'woke' friends (no great loss IMHO)
This happens to me with my MTF son, age 19 now. Every month, there's less and less of him. There's more performance, and more fakeness. The endless attempts to imitate a woman's voice and mannerisms. It's like watching a bad actor at an audition.
But then when he doesn't realize it, he reverts to his real self. He talks like himself, he acts like himself. I do everything I can to avoid popping the bubble -- I try to just let the moment wash over me, to hear my *actual* son again.
I'm his father and I have loved him every second of his life. I treasure him. But he is doing everything he can to find a way to hate me, now. He wants that "evil parent" narrative, which seems to be a trophy among the trans kids. I feel so broken, so exhausted and defeated.
This hits so hard. We cannot feel trans joy that we know is false and dangerous. We have to put up these walls with our own child because it hurts too much. And then, a bit of light shines through a tiny crack in the mask they all wear. Hold onto that light, OP. That glimpse you get is our hope.
Yes, the glimpses. Someone in the comments said they feel they love a little bit less because of this madness and I agree. My child keeps me at a distance, not totally out, but not totally in. After years of “not Normal”, I actually feel my heart is broken and not capable of full healing. I am so tired.
It’s so hard. Find solace in something else: gardening, wild nature, church, outreach. Sounds very much like you need soul-food. As do all here, and I salute you all.
I know exactly what you mean. As a child of Parental Alienation, my son has worn an armor of sorts for years. He was manipulated to reject me by his Father and could show no love for me at all. The few times over the years I saw him, the armor would slip and I saw my son again. It would last until he realized he was breaking the rules and the vacant eyes and armor reappeared. It is soul crushing. 💗
That is so poignant, your boy seeing you, his loving mother, in those moments when truth and mother nature breaks through the stranglehold of his father's lies and manipulation. My father was similarly poisoned against his mother, by his father, to totally reject his mother his whole life (from 8), to the point of telling his us, his son and two daughters, that she was dead, when she lived just a couple of hours drive away. We never met her. She never even knew of our existence. The legacy of that poisoning has continued through to my children, who have been no-contact estranged from me for more than six years now, only this time, their father was not the culprit. Jealous extended family, 'friends' and the wider culture of mother-blaming, combined with anti-women Incel and Trans activism that have done a great deal to destroy what was left of the family values that had survived to keep previous generations, with a few exceptions, bonded. ❤
I'm so sorry. I wouldn't wish this hell on anyone. What my son has been through and is going through rips my heart. When they age out there is little to nothing we can do except to make sure they know we love them and always will. 😢
The title alone put a lump in my throat. Yes!! A glimpse… it’s what I hold onto & pray for more of. A glimpse… he’s still in there. Under the brokenness… but he’s still there. I pray the glimpses give you hope in the heartache of waiting for him to come back.
I'm in the same situation. my FTM is on an all time high wince starting T 4 weeks ago. already I see changes in her body. her breasts are 1/2 their size. Yesterday I peeked in her room, she was sleeping, and I saw a boy in place of my beautiful girl. It shatters my heart every day. I'm a mess.
I know that feeling so well. Both of my college-age kids have flipped, one boy and one girl, now the reverse. Fortunately we still have good relationships (it was challenging to acheive this "soft landing"), and therefore I get a chance to have non-trivial conversations with both kids from time-to-time. It is then that some of my happiest moments are found, for I see the old kid shining through in this trans facade, complete with the old voice, old cadences, idioms, and all that makes a unique stamp on an individual. I hope and pray that my kids will come back in full.
Yes, I saw this travesty. I love how Smith still purports to be a women's college that graciously opened its doors to men as long as they promise to be virtuous, feminine, tastefully dressed, well-coifed dudes in drag.
I'm quite certain that the majority of young people would give up the trans thing if not for the 24/7 brainwashing campaign. In fact, it wouldn't even cross their minds in the first place, unless they were future gays and lesbians (some of my best friends) who would outgrow it by puberty.
I predict we will see more of this doubling down. The tide is turning, and it's time to put the wagons in a circle. Their entire brand is based on a gigantic lie bolstered by virtue signaling, and that's hard to let go of. How will they feel good about themselves?
Know the feeling. He called last night, I hear his voice, which he is no longer trying to change, but I cant see those changes, which I know the estrogen is doing. He is amazing!!! always has been. Yesterday was a hard conversation, over the phone. He told me has come to the point of accepting that I am never going to accept who "he" (obviouly he used I) really is. Once again I told him, I totally accept who he is (because as you say he is really a good person) I just dont accept what he is doing. I am trying to not let this affect me, but once again, one more sleepless night.
I know that glimpse all to well. My son is 17, has not transitioned because we have not allowed it. I know it's coming as soon as he graduates in a year though. He was always such a sweet, kind kid. Sometimes he forgets he's so angry at us for not affirming him and he shows kindness and love towards us. Sometimes he catches himself and I see him quickly withdraw and other times he doesn't even notice. It makes me happy for a moment and then sad when I see he hides his innate kindness and love. It's heartbreaking almost every single day. Sending you a huge hug and lots of love ❤️
My heart breaks for every parent and/or loved one that is dealing with this anguish. I myself, am breaking down almost everyday knowing the dangers and the repercussions this will bring our children. My 24yr old son has now been on HRT for 6 years and won’t see me unless I affirm his identity which I won’t. I still proclaim my love and care for him but won’t go along with this delusion cause that is exactly what this is. I just can’t wrap my brain around it that so many people can’t see this for what it is. How did we get so many people who have been misled and misinformed. But most importantly lacking any common sense. Isn’t that really all it takes to see the dangers in this ideology? I want my son back and I want every Dr and/or person who contributed to this insanity to be held accountable. And I mean as accountable as one could be held accountable. This mass mutilation and prescribing devastating pharmaceuticals for something that can’t be changed is beyond humane or ethical.
Your beautifully written story tugged on my heart and my eyes watered. A glimpse. This is so heartbreaking. I hate the trans-cult! I am sad for you and all the other moms who have lost their child to the trans lies. You grew your child inside of you, you have a deep connection to your child that no one else will ever have. Your child knows the sound of your heart beating, as your child listened to it all day and all night as your child safely grew in your womb. Your child. Forever your child. In your case, forever your son, your beautiful, loved son. What a travesty.
I don't have kids but it breaks my heart to read the testimony of all you parents whose children have announced a trans identity. I have friends who have kids and who believe in the trans nonsense, and I just can't see how they don't see the huge risks it poses. I seem to have fallen out with one friend and his wife over this, and for their kids' sake I hope they wake up and stop playing along, even though doing so would alienate them from their 'woke' friends (no great loss IMHO)
This happens to me with my MTF son, age 19 now. Every month, there's less and less of him. There's more performance, and more fakeness. The endless attempts to imitate a woman's voice and mannerisms. It's like watching a bad actor at an audition.
But then when he doesn't realize it, he reverts to his real self. He talks like himself, he acts like himself. I do everything I can to avoid popping the bubble -- I try to just let the moment wash over me, to hear my *actual* son again.
I'm his father and I have loved him every second of his life. I treasure him. But he is doing everything he can to find a way to hate me, now. He wants that "evil parent" narrative, which seems to be a trophy among the trans kids. I feel so broken, so exhausted and defeated.
It is all an act and so very painful to watch. I am sorry for your loss, too.
This rings so true for me.
I'm feeling all the same feels. You are not alone. Thanks for sharing.
I feel this pain too with my 23 year old daughter with a beard - there are no words. I’m sorry for your pain and grateful for the glimpses
This hits so hard. We cannot feel trans joy that we know is false and dangerous. We have to put up these walls with our own child because it hurts too much. And then, a bit of light shines through a tiny crack in the mask they all wear. Hold onto that light, OP. That glimpse you get is our hope.
Yes, the glimpses. Someone in the comments said they feel they love a little bit less because of this madness and I agree. My child keeps me at a distance, not totally out, but not totally in. After years of “not Normal”, I actually feel my heart is broken and not capable of full healing. I am so tired.
It’s so hard. Find solace in something else: gardening, wild nature, church, outreach. Sounds very much like you need soul-food. As do all here, and I salute you all.
I know exactly what you mean. As a child of Parental Alienation, my son has worn an armor of sorts for years. He was manipulated to reject me by his Father and could show no love for me at all. The few times over the years I saw him, the armor would slip and I saw my son again. It would last until he realized he was breaking the rules and the vacant eyes and armor reappeared. It is soul crushing. 💗
That is so poignant, your boy seeing you, his loving mother, in those moments when truth and mother nature breaks through the stranglehold of his father's lies and manipulation. My father was similarly poisoned against his mother, by his father, to totally reject his mother his whole life (from 8), to the point of telling his us, his son and two daughters, that she was dead, when she lived just a couple of hours drive away. We never met her. She never even knew of our existence. The legacy of that poisoning has continued through to my children, who have been no-contact estranged from me for more than six years now, only this time, their father was not the culprit. Jealous extended family, 'friends' and the wider culture of mother-blaming, combined with anti-women Incel and Trans activism that have done a great deal to destroy what was left of the family values that had survived to keep previous generations, with a few exceptions, bonded. ❤
I'm so sorry. I wouldn't wish this hell on anyone. What my son has been through and is going through rips my heart. When they age out there is little to nothing we can do except to make sure they know we love them and always will. 😢
The title alone put a lump in my throat. Yes!! A glimpse… it’s what I hold onto & pray for more of. A glimpse… he’s still in there. Under the brokenness… but he’s still there. I pray the glimpses give you hope in the heartache of waiting for him to come back.
Yes, he is. The little boy is buried under layers of armor waiting for anyone to rescue him. 💗
I'm in the same situation. my FTM is on an all time high wince starting T 4 weeks ago. already I see changes in her body. her breasts are 1/2 their size. Yesterday I peeked in her room, she was sleeping, and I saw a boy in place of my beautiful girl. It shatters my heart every day. I'm a mess.
Your little girl will always be there. Safely buried under the fabrication. Think of her when you look at the faux boy disguise. 💗
I know that feeling so well. Both of my college-age kids have flipped, one boy and one girl, now the reverse. Fortunately we still have good relationships (it was challenging to acheive this "soft landing"), and therefore I get a chance to have non-trivial conversations with both kids from time-to-time. It is then that some of my happiest moments are found, for I see the old kid shining through in this trans facade, complete with the old voice, old cadences, idioms, and all that makes a unique stamp on an individual. I hope and pray that my kids will come back in full.
My goodness. Stay strong & maintain those relationships. I can’t imagine what a heartbreak this must be for your whole family.
Those moments have kept me going and renew my hope. 💗
Both kids. What a heartache.
What are the odds?
Covid was just a warm-up. Trans is the real pandemic. Interesting how invested the medical profession is in both cases.
Hi Beeswax. Right. There is nothing organic about this cult.
Absent the Frankenstein Industrial Complex I think the majority of young people would give it up.
Speaking of the FIC, did you hear about Richard Levine being honored at Smith College commencement?
https://www.smith.edu/news-events/news/four-honorands-speak-commencement
https://www.zerohedge.com/political/historic-womens-college-give-honorary-degree-rachel-levine-man
Yes, I saw this travesty. I love how Smith still purports to be a women's college that graciously opened its doors to men as long as they promise to be virtuous, feminine, tastefully dressed, well-coifed dudes in drag.
I'm quite certain that the majority of young people would give up the trans thing if not for the 24/7 brainwashing campaign. In fact, it wouldn't even cross their minds in the first place, unless they were future gays and lesbians (some of my best friends) who would outgrow it by puberty.
I predict we will see more of this doubling down. The tide is turning, and it's time to put the wagons in a circle. Their entire brand is based on a gigantic lie bolstered by virtue signaling, and that's hard to let go of. How will they feel good about themselves?
I am so sorry you are going through this. This must be so painful. Praying one day he will come back to you as himself.
Know the feeling. He called last night, I hear his voice, which he is no longer trying to change, but I cant see those changes, which I know the estrogen is doing. He is amazing!!! always has been. Yesterday was a hard conversation, over the phone. He told me has come to the point of accepting that I am never going to accept who "he" (obviouly he used I) really is. Once again I told him, I totally accept who he is (because as you say he is really a good person) I just dont accept what he is doing. I am trying to not let this affect me, but once again, one more sleepless night.
I think that's a perfect response and I feel exactly the same way.We except and love their authentic selves, not a character in some toxic play.
I know that glimpse all to well. My son is 17, has not transitioned because we have not allowed it. I know it's coming as soon as he graduates in a year though. He was always such a sweet, kind kid. Sometimes he forgets he's so angry at us for not affirming him and he shows kindness and love towards us. Sometimes he catches himself and I see him quickly withdraw and other times he doesn't even notice. It makes me happy for a moment and then sad when I see he hides his innate kindness and love. It's heartbreaking almost every single day. Sending you a huge hug and lots of love ❤️
It is. As a parent it is our responsibility to protect them from harm. Even from themselves.