30 Comments

Very good suggestion! Thank you

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Very good points, thank you!

It is important to take the time to review books from authors you support. I do try to avoid buying books from Amazon, so I don't always get the verified purchase validation.

Make sure you actually read the book--ha, I have seen reviews where the reviewer obviously hasn't read the book.

And yes, review books outside of the gender topic.

Somewhat off-topic here, but this also goes to getting up a comment on the NYT to WAPO. Comment on various pieces--not just gender stuff.

Make good arguments--don't rant.

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Great ideas here.

I have engaged in the inverse of this for books written by trans IOT “uplift” other trans. My estranged son published his story in this linked anthology. I contributed my review to balance out the lovefest and to embed a desperate call for my son to come home. I’m glad Amazon has not censored it out yet.

Nameless Woman: An Anthology of Fiction by Trans Women of Color https://a.co/d/enW9vS8

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Very courageous of you. I’m praying with you for all of our children to come home. 🙏🏼

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Amazon has more weirdness in their review system than even what this article mentions. A while back, I got an email from Amazon saying that my review has been deleted for being in violation of their policies.

What review? They didn't say. (And I hadn't posted any reviews recently, so whatever it is was pretty old.)

What policy did I violate? They didn't say.

What should I have done differently? They didn't say.

A system that tells you "you did something wrong," but won't explain what the problem is or how to fix it, is broken. Either deliberately or as the result of bad design, Amazon's review system is broken, and given their actions in other areas touching on moral issues, I suspect it may be deliberate. If you post reviews, be aware that they can be disappeared without warning or explanation.

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Amazon is weird and unpredictable. I always post my reviews in Goodreads too, which seems more reliable at times.

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Here are some more books to consider reviewing. Each of them has valuable information about how to think of issues surrounding the topic of Trans.

Desist, Detrans and Detox- Maria Keffler. Great instruction on how to talk to your child.  Even though it is written about the author’s daughter, the logical equally applies to sons.

Gender Dysphoria: A Therapeutic Model for Working with Children, Adolescents and Young Adults - Sue and Marcus Evans. Many case studies and much wisdom applicable for parents as well as practitioners.

Parents Hold On To Your Kids - Gordon Neufeld. Excellent book about the parent-child relationship, relevant even for parents of older children.

A Practical Response to Gender Distress – Pamela Garfield-Jaeger. Social worker and therapist author offers “tips and tools for families.”

Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents – Randi Kreger. Even though this is for parents of children diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, which is an identity disturbance, it may be helpful in learning how to communicate with a child who is gender confused and in an emotionally distressed state.

Time to Think - Hannah Barnes. The story of what went wrong at the Tavistock gender identity services clinic of the UK’s NHS, written by a respected BBC investigative reporter.

What Your Teenager Is Trying to Tell You - Stella O’Malley. How to be better than a counselor for your child.

More background-like:

American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers - Nancy Jo Sales. The author is a journalist, and the book is based on interviews with more than 200 teenaged girls.

Being Transgender is not Normal - Stillman Cray. The author is a transman who advocates for concentrated and very honest soul-searching and reality testing before pursuing any medical transition. The book advocates for truly open eyes before any transition, and includes many detailed issues to confront.

The Body Keeps the Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk. The author, a psychiatrist with a strong interest in trauma, focuses on how trauma affects the physical body.

Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism - Amanda Montell. The linguist author explores her theory that intense ideology or fanaticism develop from powerful uses of language.

The Detransition Diaries – Lahl and Fell. This book is a companion to the Center for Bioethics & Culture’s film “Saving our Sisters.”

The End of Gender- Debra Soh. This neuroscientist and sexologist accessibly covers the science and politics of sex and gender research.

Freedom of the Mind - Steven Hassan. The cult-expert author provides an awareness of issues connected with cults and advice about protecting or extricating oneself or a loved one. (Another Cult Expert is Patrick Ryan https://cultmediation.com/about/ , who is familiar with the issue of trans and who offers consultation services.)

Good Girls - Hadley Freeman. This book is about anorexia nervosa, and the author’s experience of the condition. Much of it maps directly onto trans identification, especially in adolescent and young adult females.

The Man Who Would be Queen - J. Michael Bailey. Experienced research focuses on research surrounding autogynophelia.

Material Girls: Why Reality Matters for Feminism - Kathleen Stock. The philosopher author examines issues threading among sex, gender, and feminism, to analyze the current idea that ones feeling called gender identity is more significant than biological sex.

The Righteous Mind - Jonathan Haidt. This social psychologist author explores the basis of moral judgments and how individuals can have such differing instincts about them.

Sleeping Beauties - Dr. Suzanne O’Sullivan. Although the author studiously avoids the subject of trans, her examination of culture-bound syndromes is very evocative for anyone interested in gender issues.

Stolen Focus - Johann Hari. Relevant to the impact of use of internet.

T: The Story of Testosterone, the Hormone the Dominates and Divides Us-

Carole Hooven. The author is an evolutionary biologist. She tells stories from throughout history, and in including recent research to explore the powerful societal role of testosterone.

Tomboy- Lisa Selin Davis. The author explores the historical development of the idea of tomboys, inspiring deeper thinking about defying gender boundaries.

Unsporting: How Trans Activism and Science Denial are Destroying Sport – Linda Blade. The Canadian sports scientist, athlete, and coach criticizes the erosion of sex-based design of sport and offers suggestions for restoring the centrality of sex in sport.

Untangled - Lisa Damour. The author, who writes and has a podcast about adolescents, explains and gives parenting advice around the developmental stages of female adolescence.

When Harry Became Sally - Ryan T. Anderson. An early book about trans, with early insights on things frequently seen today.

And it maybe is an idea to review books with damaging content, for example the Newberry Honor Book Too Bright to See by Kyle Lukoff, which leads readers through experiences of its main character, a 12-year-old girl , to coerce them to believe that it is beautiful that she finally has realized that she is actually a boy.

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Wow, what a great list! Thanks for sharing!

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These links don't work any more!

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We changed the links.

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Thanks I needed the reminder! Completed 3 reviews today.

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Which books did you like and review?

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I’m still not completely sure I’m putting sentences together coherently, so don’t be disappointed in my reviews, 😀 but I decided today that something was better than doing nothing. And hopefully it will encourage me to do more. Next time I’ll use your excellent writing advice!

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No need for perfection! I am sure those authors appreciate the time to review their book!

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Lost in Trans Nation, Dr. Hakeem’s Detrans, and the PITT book. 3 easy ones to get me started. I’m embarrassed it took me so long to get around to it, and I have more to do.

The grief with this situation literally makes me speechless for long periods. I can hardly function outside of my workday. But I’m doing a little better each day.

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Excellent books! And I understand grief. I feel it too. Be sure to take care of yourself!

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Very useful advice. Thank you!!

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Good tips. Fyi, here’s a great article that came out today in The Free Press about therapist who are blowing the whistle on harms from transgender care.

https://open.substack.com/pub/bariweiss/p/i-was-fired-after-blowing-the-whistle?r=qauq5&utm_medium=ios&utm_campaign=post

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When Kids Say They're Trans by Sasha Ayad, Lisa Marchiano, Stella O'Malley. A typo in the title, another in the author's name, and first author omitted. How are these book listed? Alphabetically, based on ratings, relevance, or year of publication? Or simply leading with the author's own new book as a self promotion while the titles of other books and names of authors aren't even proofread?

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We need as many books as possible out in the world that support parents and challenge medicalization and ideology. Let's focus on the big picture.

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I agree wholeheartedly. I also agree that authors absolutely should self promote. I don't like self promotion concealed as advice. Is it permissible to have an opinion or am I supposed to like whatever the bosses are saying?

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The title changed from when the book was finalized; however, the link is correct and the book is being updated to the new title currently.

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On so many keyboards "they're" identifies as "their". Argh! Even worse is "lose" transing to "loose". I hate it!

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This is an important idea. Thanks for emphasizing it, and for your list of books.

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Thank you!

Also there are some children's books by Tal Croitoru worth a look!

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Fabulous list and suggestions! Something we can all do to make a positive difference!

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Thank you for this. Something practical that we can do!!

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Oh I'd like to add to the list Gender Dysphoria: A Therapeutic Model for Working with Children, Adolescents, and Young Adults by Evans & Evans. 2021.

https://www.amazon.com/Gender-Dysphoria-Therapeutic-Children-Adolescents/dp/1912691787/ref=sr_1_3?crid=2PI2H9ERI5U36&keywords=gender+dysphoria+treatment&qid=1708009477&sprefix=gender+dysph%2Caps%2C157&sr=8-3

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Yes!

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This is super helpful. Thank you for thinking strategically to offset activists' methods. I'll do my part!

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