You are such an ass

I wake up because the animals have bothered your mother. I took a long time to reach out, only to find I am blocked.

You, my dear child, are an idiot.

I took a long time because I didn’t know if it would be good or bad. The last time we were together, we played, and then you disappeared again.

I also took a long time because I wanted it to come from you. I still don’t know what I have done to deserve being shut out. You are simply unwilling to explain.

I expect I would be disgusted by your developing self-inflicted deformity.

But disgust, or whatever else there might be, does not justify you cutting off your family. I am sure I left my father unsatisfied in any number of ways, but that did not justify erasing him from my life. And I did not.

I say again, if there is truth and goodness in what you do, then it doesn’t need defending. If it does need crazy reasoning or circular logic founded on a statement of faith that goes against everything we see and sense and know, or I make you uncomfortable because I won’t baldly accept your version of Oobleck, then maybe there’s more and a better life on my side.

The same holds true if you have someone you love, someone you know is good for you. That shouldn’t need my validation either. But when you have poisoned her, or she you, with the idea that I am bad for your health, and to such a degree that she refuses to meet me, I think something is very wrong.

Again, if something is true, if it sustains and makes for a better life, if it builds on what came before to make the next generation, and celebrates beauty and life and the beauty in life, then you might be on to something enduring.

But that’s not what this identity of your does. It destroy, it alienates, it will make your life harder and harder. It is unsustainable, it is life-shortening, and it is ugly.

And again, if it is so true, and I am an idiot, let your light shine. Then my fog should just lift.

I expect you know it won’t and it can’t, and at some level you are living a lie that it is easier to soldier on with right now than to abandon. The problem is the longer you go down the wrong path, the further you are from truth and a future that really fills you.

One of the worst parts that people say they lose, that parents notice children lose, is the exploration and play in really growing up. Your life gets so wrapped up in an invention of identity that the normal milestones and breakthroughs and discoveries, and fun are lost, and we lose so much of that anyway.

And we don’t even know all the effects that chemically interrupting your development has on your brain, but we do know you are in an important time for brain growth and development, and you are causing damage.

You are being an ass. Just stop. Please stop.