Dear x, I see that N is getting worse and worse despite the depression medication and all the therapy sessions with you. He complains of having a lot of anxiety, plus, as you know, he is still on sick leave. The really concerning thing is that, when he started the sessions with you he was fine—he had two jobs and was working on his PhD—and now he is barely surviving and has given up everything.
Thanks for this letter. Your story is similar to mine. Both of my children, with stressful and abusive childhoods, are transitioning and are in their thirties. Both had a psychological break after personal setbacks around the age of thirty. The transgender push preys upon vulnerable people of various ages. I sense your anger in the letter and I share it with you.
Yes, there are some who have worked on this. Please visit my blog tomorrow, uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com when I think I can write up something. I googled deprogramming experts for cult extrication. So far, it seems that limiting online time, spending time on non-tech activities, parents doing all chores (not sex segregated) and trying to keep the wrong crowd out of your life. For misguided extended family members who try to affirm, explain about Richard Hoskins and Hasci Horvath, who de transitioned and are found in google search. It appears that the victimhood narrative is compelling to vulnerable kids who are upset at history of colonialism. Also, supporting some charity and finding a mission is helpful. I like heifer.org, where you can pay to send a girl to school. Good luck. You can contact me on the blog, if you wish.
This is all so frightening and dystopian, only relieved by the sanity and courage of people like you shining the light of truth on it. You are doing the right thing by your boy. Love and strength to you.
Unfortunately, one of the worst is Ray Blanchard, who somehow is an advisor to genspect. You can find my comments about him, without naming him, in my Elmer Fudd Diagnosis essay at uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com
Thanks for the article. I just want to point out a potential error: The detrans group is growing at about 100 a week, not 1000. (It is still a huge increase but I just think in the current climate it's best to be as accurate as possible with our info). Sending you hugs and support!
That is a good question. It really points out the flaw in the idea that everybody can be independent at 18. Or, in my state at 15. With regards to Mental Health parents have nothing to say after that.
It's the reason our mentally ill nephew died of suicide in his jail cell. The state would not allow his parents to pursue commitment for him. The state chose the wishes of a 23-year old schizophrenic over at the pleading of his parents
When I read these stories I just dream that you can swoop in, grab your child, and move somewhere where your child can get fresh air, sunshine, exercise, good food and be far far away form the internet. I feel like these posts from parents are a cry into the void. I feel so helpless. All I can do is bear witness and send love and pray.
I am sending you hugs and strength. I spend most of my day asking why? What’s in it for these therapists? It cannot just be money. It has to be plain stupidity. Sheep following incorrect information. What happened to thinking.
I think it is mostly stupidity. Unfortunately, from what I gather, psychology is not a very hard degree to get. It should be one of the hardest but it's not. Do they teach future therapists critical thinking skills? How much developmental biology are they required to take? I don't know the answers. There ARE good therapists out there for sure, but I think there are way too many subpar ones.
This is poignant and relevant. You speak for so many parents who feel abandoned by medicine and psychology. Can you convince your son to take a break from this therapy and help you with a project, work on sorting through old family photos, anything? The university environment is also to blame for the situation. Bessel van der Kolk's book about anxiety & PTSD, The Body Keeps the Score, is a great resource. Also about how the brain recovers, Norman Doidge, MD book called The Brain That Changes Itself. Can your son take a leave from the PhD program? Can you tell him about Thalidomide, DES, Lobotomy surgeries, and other medical scandals where "the experts" were wrong? You'll find links and info on these at my blog,
uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com Please come over and comment, continue to tell about your story. You and your son deserve better. Ute
I agree about asking him to work on any kind of project - doing something different from focusing on the great obsession - and family photos are a great idea for reconnecting to his old self and to his family, ie those who really care about him. GI was invented in the University and the education system has swallowed it whole hog. Colleges seem to bend over backwards to promote the cult religion under a mistaken sense of kindness/understanding/diversity/we are so advanced - sort of mentality.
Yes, it is ritual conditioning and manipulation, coercion and brainwashing. I am starting to look up deprogramming and see if there are psychological phases that have been studied.
Please let us know what you find. I believe we really do need deprogrammers. A problem is that the cult is weaponized to the point where many who would want to help these young people are scared. That leaves things up to parents for now.
Deprogrammers will be nervous about accusations of "conversion therapy". That is the totalitarianism of the allies. They've linked trans with social justice and act like those of us questioning are the Brown Shirts. I think the best first step is to take on confidence, tell your child this could be a phase that passes, because it has societal influences, and most kids graduate out of it, when puberty fully sets in. Also, cross sex hormones are bad for your teeth, not in the fine print! Want to have dentures like great-grandpa after you turn 45? Maybe not like that. The YouTube channel Exulansic has a lot of the science about damage and regrets that the mainstream media is not covering. My guess is that the recent Dr. Phil show is going to peak a lot of people. I think there are separate male and female issues, and the deprogramming needs to be specialized. I've felt alienated from some mean girls and superficial women, I am not one of those women, but I am a woman. Do consider visiting my blog, uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com
How about parents write a step by step reaction guide? LIke Step 1. Do not start grieving. Be calm. Act the way you would if you found a rather large stash of pot in your sons/daughter's backpack.
2. If you get dragged to a "gender therapist", ask them to read the small print, with their voice. Do not let these people get away with fake "expertise". Remind them of the scandals of thalidomide, DES (diethylsilbestrol), electric shock therapy and lobotomies.
3. Figure out whether it is related to your son feeling that he is not tall, big, muscular and Malrboro Man (big American myth, Hollywood influence) enough to 'be a guy.
4. Or, if it is your daughter, freaking out about breasts and periods.
5. Act very Clint Eastwood confident about your knowledge of sexual coming of age. Tell your son/daughter that you had discomforts, doubts, questions when you were this age. Not the same, but doubts, nonetheless.
6. Figure out friends, online groomers, etc. Take your kids phone and put it into quarantine. Just like I "lost" the toy machine gun someone gave my son on his 4th birthday. Say to yourself, I know how to deal with this. I am his mother/father. Please visit my blog,
uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com and make comments or contact me on the form, if you give me details, I can at least make suggestions. Tell your child you found a guru for parents, who knows quite a lot more than these school anti-bullying groups (I do), but she is careful, because of the problem with the trans allies doxxing. Take back your family.
hey kindly go fuck your side sideways with a tazer
Thanks for this letter. Your story is similar to mine. Both of my children, with stressful and abusive childhoods, are transitioning and are in their thirties. Both had a psychological break after personal setbacks around the age of thirty. The transgender push preys upon vulnerable people of various ages. I sense your anger in the letter and I share it with you.
This impressive -- so clear and specific! I am sharing it on my main FB feed. The parent essays on PITT are consistently excellent and high-quality.
Yes, there are some who have worked on this. Please visit my blog tomorrow, uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com when I think I can write up something. I googled deprogramming experts for cult extrication. So far, it seems that limiting online time, spending time on non-tech activities, parents doing all chores (not sex segregated) and trying to keep the wrong crowd out of your life. For misguided extended family members who try to affirm, explain about Richard Hoskins and Hasci Horvath, who de transitioned and are found in google search. It appears that the victimhood narrative is compelling to vulnerable kids who are upset at history of colonialism. Also, supporting some charity and finding a mission is helpful. I like heifer.org, where you can pay to send a girl to school. Good luck. You can contact me on the blog, if you wish.
This is all so frightening and dystopian, only relieved by the sanity and courage of people like you shining the light of truth on it. You are doing the right thing by your boy. Love and strength to you.
I hope we're all taking notes, because the time is coming to name and shame these bad actors.
Unfortunately, one of the worst is Ray Blanchard, who somehow is an advisor to genspect. You can find my comments about him, without naming him, in my Elmer Fudd Diagnosis essay at uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com
I'm with you - name and shame. Once the tide has turned a little we need to make a museum like has been done in Salem, MA.
Amen, Sister!!
:)
We need to conceptualize that day in order to get there - never too early to make plans.
Thanks for the article. I just want to point out a potential error: The detrans group is growing at about 100 a week, not 1000. (It is still a huge increase but I just think in the current climate it's best to be as accurate as possible with our info). Sending you hugs and support!
What grounds do you have for filing a complaint if your adult child thinks all is fine in his disoriented state?
There is an ethical medical protocol which says you shouldn't transition people with diagnosed mental illness.
Ah in the us it's just comorbidities "under control." Not defined.
Yeah - but unethical care must end. Would it be ok to chop a patient's ear off at the hospital if he suddenly decided he wanted that?
That is a good question. It really points out the flaw in the idea that everybody can be independent at 18. Or, in my state at 15. With regards to Mental Health parents have nothing to say after that.
It is so sad. And GI teaches the kids to slow walk it to 18 and then go for broke. Just tell mom and dad it's no big deal.
It's the reason our mentally ill nephew died of suicide in his jail cell. The state would not allow his parents to pursue commitment for him. The state chose the wishes of a 23-year old schizophrenic over at the pleading of his parents
So sorry.
I am so, so sorry.
When I read these stories I just dream that you can swoop in, grab your child, and move somewhere where your child can get fresh air, sunshine, exercise, good food and be far far away form the internet. I feel like these posts from parents are a cry into the void. I feel so helpless. All I can do is bear witness and send love and pray.
I am sending you hugs and strength. I spend most of my day asking why? What’s in it for these therapists? It cannot just be money. It has to be plain stupidity. Sheep following incorrect information. What happened to thinking.
I think it is mostly stupidity. Unfortunately, from what I gather, psychology is not a very hard degree to get. It should be one of the hardest but it's not. Do they teach future therapists critical thinking skills? How much developmental biology are they required to take? I don't know the answers. There ARE good therapists out there for sure, but I think there are way too many subpar ones.
This is poignant and relevant. You speak for so many parents who feel abandoned by medicine and psychology. Can you convince your son to take a break from this therapy and help you with a project, work on sorting through old family photos, anything? The university environment is also to blame for the situation. Bessel van der Kolk's book about anxiety & PTSD, The Body Keeps the Score, is a great resource. Also about how the brain recovers, Norman Doidge, MD book called The Brain That Changes Itself. Can your son take a leave from the PhD program? Can you tell him about Thalidomide, DES, Lobotomy surgeries, and other medical scandals where "the experts" were wrong? You'll find links and info on these at my blog,
uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com Please come over and comment, continue to tell about your story. You and your son deserve better. Ute
I agree about asking him to work on any kind of project - doing something different from focusing on the great obsession - and family photos are a great idea for reconnecting to his old self and to his family, ie those who really care about him. GI was invented in the University and the education system has swallowed it whole hog. Colleges seem to bend over backwards to promote the cult religion under a mistaken sense of kindness/understanding/diversity/we are so advanced - sort of mentality.
Yes, it is ritual conditioning and manipulation, coercion and brainwashing. I am starting to look up deprogramming and see if there are psychological phases that have been studied.
Please let us know what you find. I believe we really do need deprogrammers. A problem is that the cult is weaponized to the point where many who would want to help these young people are scared. That leaves things up to parents for now.
Deprogrammers will be nervous about accusations of "conversion therapy". That is the totalitarianism of the allies. They've linked trans with social justice and act like those of us questioning are the Brown Shirts. I think the best first step is to take on confidence, tell your child this could be a phase that passes, because it has societal influences, and most kids graduate out of it, when puberty fully sets in. Also, cross sex hormones are bad for your teeth, not in the fine print! Want to have dentures like great-grandpa after you turn 45? Maybe not like that. The YouTube channel Exulansic has a lot of the science about damage and regrets that the mainstream media is not covering. My guess is that the recent Dr. Phil show is going to peak a lot of people. I think there are separate male and female issues, and the deprogramming needs to be specialized. I've felt alienated from some mean girls and superficial women, I am not one of those women, but I am a woman. Do consider visiting my blog, uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com
Thank you, you are Brave and I applaud you.
How about parents write a step by step reaction guide? LIke Step 1. Do not start grieving. Be calm. Act the way you would if you found a rather large stash of pot in your sons/daughter's backpack.
2. If you get dragged to a "gender therapist", ask them to read the small print, with their voice. Do not let these people get away with fake "expertise". Remind them of the scandals of thalidomide, DES (diethylsilbestrol), electric shock therapy and lobotomies.
3. Figure out whether it is related to your son feeling that he is not tall, big, muscular and Malrboro Man (big American myth, Hollywood influence) enough to 'be a guy.
4. Or, if it is your daughter, freaking out about breasts and periods.
5. Act very Clint Eastwood confident about your knowledge of sexual coming of age. Tell your son/daughter that you had discomforts, doubts, questions when you were this age. Not the same, but doubts, nonetheless.
6. Figure out friends, online groomers, etc. Take your kids phone and put it into quarantine. Just like I "lost" the toy machine gun someone gave my son on his 4th birthday. Say to yourself, I know how to deal with this. I am his mother/father. Please visit my blog,
uteheggengrasswidow.wordpress.com and make comments or contact me on the form, if you give me details, I can at least make suggestions. Tell your child you found a guru for parents, who knows quite a lot more than these school anti-bullying groups (I do), but she is careful, because of the problem with the trans allies doxxing. Take back your family.