My life began the day my beautiful son was born. With his first breath I found my purpose in life and a love that I had never experienced before. He made me a mother. I have other children now besides him, but he always will hold a special place in my heart because he made me who I was meant to be.
What is going on with these boys that this grabs them at all the same time? Is it sexual or not? Iatrogenesis seems to be at play which I have to believe is coming from early exposure to online porn... but the cultural elements at play are immense. I still believe an event in their own life causes them to seek out this coping mechanism. This is a coping mechanism for shame and to avoid pain or inflicting pain as a male. There are so many layers to all things trans. We just have to keep pulling back the onion. It is going to be a long journey so we must stick together and work together to heal from this dreadful human experiment!
Sounds a lot like my story. Except yours got a job. My son, I found out after prom when a Band mom broke the news to me. That was 7 years ago. He moved out 3 years later, now is supposed to be in Law school, bit skipped semesters. He is a different person. Castration, breast implants, has cut me off. He says I really don't love him. He is my whole world. And, no matter what I do or say is not good enough or too late. He is all I have.
I really feel for you & your family I have a similar story. I am in the Uk my son 17 has socially transitioned for about 5-6 years now. I just can’t seem to get through to him. He is an intelligent beautiful human & I just pray constantly that he will see the lie for what it is & come through before any lasting damage is done. He is living at home at the moment. Wanting to become a commercial pilot ( I’m not sure if his being trans will be detrimental to his career choice although looking at the virgin advertisment maybe not ) he is quiet strongly a Christian & we are just trying to love him through this.
My heart goes out to you!! We adopted two boys that are now young men and although we had our issues they never doubted or questioned that they were boys. Sometimes those of us that don't go through what you have need to understand how blessed we are!
As a mother of four I understand your heartbreak. Raising children is a real challenge and a great learning experience. In 1979 I wrote a 300 page manuscript on raising chldren with 23 years of experience. It didn't go because the AMA did not approve as I did not have a Doctorate. The publisher needed to get the approval of the AMA. I am sure the AMA would not approve, because of what I had written about vaccines from first hand experience; and the incompetency of the pediatrician, which led to a very sickly child. I was young and naive; and knew nothing about nutrition. M son's doctor told me what to feed my son from the time he was born. I had intended to nurse, but was given pills in the hospital which dried up my milk. When I questioned the nurse about the pills she handed me, she snapped at me, "The doctor ordered them. Take them!" I obeyed instantly, then I found out what they were. I cried for three days. I knew mother's milk was the best. Then, the formula the pediatrician told me to give the baby was totally deficient in nutrients and the child screamed for 3 months. Being ignorant about nutrition...I didn't know what was wrong. I didnt wake up, until he was 4-1/2, when a good friend handed me books and told me to start reading. After opening the first book, my entire life changed. It was that eureka moment! For 62 years I have been on a search for the truth. There are so many lies that if things don't change there will be no more problems...the world will be gone. I am writing a free substack entitled Journey to Wellness...based on health and nutrition research I have done, since 1961, I want to give people the benefit of my personal , non-funded research: barbaracharis.substack.com
All I can say is, "I'm sorry!" In a way, I'm glad others have a similar story. I don't have to feel so alone. But, I would rather be alone in this than have so many other children and parents hurting. So, once again, "I'm sorry!"
Thank you for your article. I am struggling with nearly the exact same situation and I feel so alone. I have lost my sweet boy to brainwashing and indoctrination. He is angry, spiteful, and defensive in all aspects of conversation. I don’t know where he is living. His thoughts make no sense and I can tell, if we talk, his answers are scripted. His medication and ideals were encouraged by the college he attends. That WE paid for (no longer). He is ruined forever. There is no happy ending. I appreciate your words so I don’t feel so alone.
You're not alone but I do understand the feeling entirely. Just keeping loving him, he knows in his heart what's right and I'm hopeful they will come around.
Brilliant, and well done. I’m in Edinburgh but if there’s any way I can get there, I will. Primark is absolutely irresponsible. So is childline it seems.
Joining terf calender now. It’s a fab idea as they always seem to be one step ahead.
Well done you, I’m assuming you may be linked with posy? Really well done for all that we so need to collectively go for the same target.
In US: have you come across MassResistance.org? Kara Dansky? International Women's Declaration? HandsAcrossTheAisle - Women in Coalition?
Here in the UK we have a campaigning group called Sex-Matters..org who cover the range of harms from Gender Identity Ideology - see their list of links to allied campaigns.
There are now many "Gender Critical" therapists in UK. E.g. "genspect" and "Thoughtful Therapists".
The UK's Equality and Human Rights Commission is headed by a Chair who understands the harms from GI.
Apart from the civil servants in Dept for Education, the Conservative Gov in UK now understands that it must debate and discuss this issue. On June 12th there will be a Parliamentary debate in an off-site Chamber on two petitions (1) That the word sex in the Equality Act 2010 means "biological sex" and (2) the opposite - a demand to keep the confused state of the meaning of sex.
A group of 10 parents is crowdfunding for a legal action against the Dept for Education to stop the indoctrination with GI ideology in state schools. This will be a very important legal case.
Please act in concert with other parents, women, gays and lesbians, etc. all those harmed by GI ideology.
It will fall under the weight of its own illogicality and viciousness. All of these crazy ideologies do eventually. Imagine you are, say, living in France in 1941. The Nazis seem all powerful and unstoppable, but they were gone by 1945. Same for Maoism, communism etc etc. More to the point, Trans isn't about concepts such as who owns capital or the redistribution of resources. It is attacking the very nature of reality and the way in which we hominids have ordered societies since we before Homo Sapiens became the dominant species. It will eventually fall when it reaches a tipping point.
I'm in the UK, otherwise known as Terf Island. We are beginning to see changes here. Our Tory government will hopefully repeal the egregious Gender Recognition Act, which allowed all of this insanity. Our PM is a Terf and we got rid of the Scottish First Minister over self-id and we're getting the Tavistock closed down. And we have Posie Parker and LWS.
Elsewhere the struggle continues, I know. But I think it was instructive that Megyn Kelly has gone full Terf. As has Elon Musk. But it's going to happen from the bottom up. The sheer groundswell and numbers of families who have had to endure the destruction of the nuclear bomb that is Trans ideology will eventually spill over into wider public consciousness. Its just a matter of time. If you are on Twitter, look for @terfcalendar. We are going to start a global (western) walk-out of schools on the last Friday of every month, to protest Trans.
Stay strong. Dont be discouraged. Get hold of some stickers and plaster them anywhere you see Trans propaganda. It's about raising awareness and shifting positions one person at a time until we reach a critical mass.
Thanks for that. When the end of the trans delusion happens, where do you see all these lost teens/young adults that have estranged themselves from their families for not affirming?
That's a really good question. Unlike historical equivalents when kids have gone mad en masse, like the Hitler Youth, or Red Guard or Kosmosol, these kids have, many of them, been altered by chemicals. Everyone focuses on the impact of PBs and X-sex hormones on primary and secondary sexual characteristics. But I've seen almost nothing said about brain development. In adolescence the brain goes through a massive period of growth and 'pruning' of the neural synapses. Crucially Myelin is laid down in the frontal cortex. This process allows for the development of higher-order cognitive skills, ie meta-cognition (thinking about thinking ) and Executive Functioning skills (planning, impulse control etc). Absolutely NOBODY knows how PBs and X-sex impact on these functions. It's what makes their use even more egregious, never mind micor-penisis and no breast tissue!
So, to answer your question, I think the youngsters who have taken hormones will likely be brain-damaged. How this will manifest is unknown. But I believe they will not be able to operate as fully functional, responsible and entirely independent adults. They will remain infantalised, or they may all develop sociopathy, or dementia even. Nobody knows! I think that when the current Trans madness ends and their friends abandon them, they will return home to be cared for by their ever-suffering parents. They may need to be looked after in some way for the rest of their lives - or they may come through neurobiologically unscathed (although I doubt that - the brain is extremely sensitive to environmental 'insults').
Then there are those who have done irreversible surgeries. They too will have lifelong psychological problems, and who will look after them - their parents and families, that's who.
When you see interviews with old Hitler Youth or Red Guard types, they describe it as if they were in a 'fog'. They look back at their younger selves with disbelief and incredulity. The problem here is that the whole edifice of Trans has to fall first, before these youngsters return to sanity. But it will. It cannot last. 'Gender Dysphoria' is not real. It's a mass psychogenic illness.
I pray so much of what you are predicting is true Pamela! May you be the sage you seem... this can not be sustainable! The damage to everyone is mounting so quickly - how can other not see it?
Hi, I’m in the uk too and it’s really heartening to read your post. It seems we are beginning to make some heAdway here - it can’t come soon enough as our daughter has been sucked into leaving home to be with trans partner - and now I see childline/ primark are encouraging this.
Lovely to hear from you. Please follow @terfcalendar on Twitter. We are protesting outside Primark in Oxford Street, London next Wednesday if you can join us!
I forgot to add in my previous response that the Bud Light debacle shows that the wind is going out of this. Plus all of the companies getting castigated on Twitter for featuring the Pride flag. And don't forget Oxfam having to change that insulting video and apologise. Plus Lia Thomas's teamate going public.
We are trying to coordinate responses to companies on social media, so that we all, collectively. go for the same target. Just in the process of trying to organise this will some other people. If you're not on Twitter, I would advise you to join. I've only recently started. But you can get a lot of information there. Also, make a Whatsapp group with a few Terfy friends. Give each other mutual support. Otherwise you will continue to feel powerless and overhwhelmed by the Trans juggernaut.
I was on Twitter for the past two years. I worked a LOT of my anger out on that forum. It was very helpful as it was the only place I could find sane, rational responses to kids being sacrificed to the trans gods. But then a couple of months ago I decided to delete my account as I feeling toxic. I may join again… there are many days I miss knowing what is going on and being terfy ;)
I have major regrets, now that it's too late. The brainwashing happened behind our backs! Homeschool may be the only way to avoid this bs ideology now!
Thank you for sharing your family's story. I got a chill up my spine when you wrote that kids at your son's school called non-gay, non-trans kids "breeders" -- OMG!!! You said you haven't found any help online. If that is still the case, let us know. I'm sure many people following the PITT substack can share links and contacts with you. Being with other parents living through similar tragedy is very, very helpful, and you can have that.
Neither kids nor anyone else can just be 'gay' anymore b/c 'gay' is sex-based and sex itself no longer matters. The legacy LGB orgs have been taken over by 'trans' activist ideologues and redefined gays and lesbians as 'same-gender' attracted instead of 'same-sex' attracted. The invented and incoherent 'gender identity' is based on no material reality and supersedes the material reality-based category of sex. So no homosexuality or heterosexuality--it is all about 'gender identity' ideology and its 'born in the wrong body' 'faith-based' belief.
And same-gender attracted means that lesbians have male, heterosexual cross-dresser sexual fetishists, autogynephiles/transvestic fetishists, who claim to be lesbian vilifying them for not sleeping w/ them--it is misogyny and homophobia on stilts.
It is not homophobic to call out this pernicious 'trans' (TQ) fiction b/c being LGB requires no fraudulent pronouns or hormonal and surgical mutilation--that is the 'gender identity' nonsense that the 'trans' activists try to conflate and confuse w/ sex and sexuality and that some vulnerable LGBs with their internalized homophobia fall victim to and come to regret.
Exactly right. Trans Activists are fully aware that acceptance for lesbians and gays is grassroots and widespread. And they know that 'trans' does NOT enjoy the same widespread acceptance. The satanic marketing plan of 'joining' the TQ with gays and lesbians, it has benefited the TQ, and has been horrific for gays and lesbians.
When a gay person comes out: 'im ready to tell the truth about myself.'
When a trans-identified person comes out: 'im ready to tell lies about myself.'
When a gay person comes out: 'im ready to tell the truth about myself.'
When a trans-identified person comes out: 'im ready to tell lies about myself.'
Quite right. When a 'trans' person says that he/she must be his/her 'authentic' self and then proceeds to use a fake name, fraudulent pronouns, and sometimes synthetic, exogenous, cross-sex hormones and cosmetic/plastic surgeries I can't think of how they could be any more inauthentic than that. If you need all of those interventions to be your 'authentic' self you need to rethink what you are doing.
And the irony of this 'trans' 'gender identity' lunacy is that it is in service to the primary drivers of this 'trans' movement who are male, heterosexual, cross-dresser sexual fetishists, autogynephiles/transvestic fetishists, men w/ paraphilias. They are, as Helen Joyce, author of the book, 'Trans, When Ideology Meets Reality,' the "nuclear reactor" of the trans movement w/o which it would not have advanced as it has. There are very wealthy, powerful heterosexual men who have an 'erotic fixation' and are determined to drive the invented and incoherent 'gender identity' ideology wherever they can b/c of it. And they have invented the 'trans child' to cover what is a sexual paraphilia. See this relevant part of one of Joyce's interviews here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8xUrtNW6Fzo&t=664s
And of course Sweden, Finland, Norway, and England, to name some of the countries that have done a systematic review of the evidence--or lack thereof--re 'transitioning' minors, and have ceased 'transitioning' minors except under clinical protocols. 'Transitioning' should be outlawed entirely, imo, and the only credible follow-up study has shown the suicide rate is 19x higher post-transition when compared w/ matched population controls. And the emotional blackmail claim that kids will kill themselves if not 'transitioned' is 'trans' activists propaganda to scare parents into 'transing' their minor children. This is a dangerous, pernicious movement that is misogynist and homophobic to its core and no self-respecting woman or LGB supports it.
It's funny that some people seem to have a hard time believing in autogynephilia. Like it's somehow 'too strange to be believed.'
I remember sitcoms from a couple decades ago making veiled cross-dressing jokes. And the jokes landed. People laughed. A bit uncomfortably, but we understood 'what IT was'. Which is erotic cross-dressing: autogynephilia. We understood that 'being turned on by pretending to be a woman' was A THING with some men. We understood this strange quirk as a culture. And we felt mostly fine about it, since it was something these men understandably did behind closed doors. At that point it was not yet slithering its diseased tentacles into our world.
Where are the cross-dressing jokes in entertainment now? Little too on the nose in today's cultural climate I guess. Trans Identified Males put so much of their time and effort into silencing the truth about this. Thank God it's becoming more widely known, regardless of their sad efforts to 'dupe the world.'
Will, I think for some people the 'penny hasn't dropped' on the AGP/TvF
re the 'trans' 'gender identity' movement. I think many people (if they are even aware of these men in the movement b/c it is the dirty secret that is not discussed as it should be) really do believe the nonsense that the cross-dressing is just for comfort or b/c they are just more 'feminine' inside and not an arousing sexual fetish. More people are becoming aware of that fact now through social media but those of us who have researched it in the medical/psych literature or have encountered it in IRL know what it is.
And I think many people still think the 'trans' movement is Gay 2.0 and that all of the men pretending to be women have had genital surgery when most have not. And that AGPs are not the more 'girly' boys who often grow up to be gay. Those are still misunderstandings about these men and the 'trans' movement. The LGB movement was hi-jacked in service to these heterosexual men and so many people think all LGBs are onboard w/ the 'trans' agenda and clearly that is not the case.
Unfortunately some gays and lesbians have gotten caught up in the 'trans' cult often to their great regret or cluelessly support it but they will no doubt have a rude awakening about that one day. They are like the turkeys invited to the table at Thanksgiving except they are on the menu. I simultaneously have anger at them and empathy for them.
As to the jokes, apparently you can say nothing about 'trans' w/o being disappeared. I had to specifically search for Ricky Gervais on Netflix to find his specials even though I had watched them previously. And a google search for 'male comedians' did not even bring up his name. I suppose the 'statute of limitations' will never run out for his 'crime' of saying "her penis" in his stand-up routine b/c apparently telling the truth about an absurdity is no joke.
I am also angry at gay people who are not actively questioning the trans cult. But I also know that there are quite a few gay people who are desperate for a political home and terrified to be ejected from friend groups who might not yet be questioning The Cult. I am more fearless regarding my politics, but there are lots of gay people who are a bit fragile, and they are not so fearless. It takes strength to face the horrible truth: that the TQ Cult glommed onto gay and lesbian grassroots acceptance in the early 2000s in order to siphon off that acceptance for themselves. And the most destructive profile of the entire TQ cult: autogynephile males. STRAIGHT MEN.
We are living through some Strange Days, that's for sure.
ps: I posted this article before from the 'Atlantic' re the rebranding to 'transgender' for commentary/critique/educational purposes and post it again in case you have not seen it. No doubt it would not be printed today but fortunately it has been archived. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BkIQTu7BV2nifZ3sbSFpS7spWb9od3YU/view
Thank you. I have found a few since connecting here. Seeing the confusion in his once sure eyes is heartbreaking. That's my baby boy and if I could change things with a snap of a finger I would, but I can't. He's hitting a lot of road block in his life journey that I'm hopeful will lead him home again and back on the right path, but I won't hold my breath. I will just continue to love him but not play these made up games.
Yep - nailed it! Who knew this was going to be a part of the modern parenting journey? I so resonate with the author's experience of you are not educated and too old to understand... I get this from both of my kids, one trans, the other just enmeshed in sexual identities... they are of a certain generation that was raised on the internet where Pokemon evolution became real in front of them. I pray the true story of tumblr, Reddit, etc... gets more and more traction. I blame the online culture for so much of this. I have come to believe these identities were a response to early exposure to porn. If you think about it they are almost used as shields to protect themselves. I am trying to find curiosity and compassion for their experience, but mostly it just pisses me off that they are so ridiculously brainwashed!
I get very angry with my daughter too sometimes, for being such a gullible idiot. It’s not pretty but there it is anyway, a real feeling I am not allowed to have/express.
Our stories are so similar. We just found out our 19 year old autistic son with multiple other mental health issues was able to secretly obtain estrogen from a planned parenthood out of state with 1 short visit over the phone with the help of much older adults in an attempt to chemically castrate himself. We had made our rules on this very clear from the time we learned about this right before his 18th birthday (like so many others are coached to do), when he very suddenly identified as a woman & we were informed by much older family members (who both spoke for him). We told him from the beginning we loved him & that would never change, even though we didn't believe in gender theory as he does. We told him we would help him gain more independence so he could get out on his own, but our only firm rule from the beginning was that he could not live in our home & us pay for everything & him be on mind-altering hormones while he isn't emotionally or mentally mature enough to make a decision like this. There's so much he can't do that his peers can do, yet he thinks he is ready for this? He's never been in love or had a sexual relationship but he's ready for this? We begged him to stop & even told him we would do all these things to equip him so that in a few years when he's able to live on his own he could make that kind of decision & pay for it himself. We were hoping our ultimatum would wake him up & motivate him to focus on bettering himself, not further handicapping himself. Instead, he left that night to go live with the older family members. Of course he is telling everyone we kicked him out because he is trans which is not the case. We gave him a choice to live here but not on hormones, not while he can't possibly understand the longterm ramifications. Now I'm afraid the family is going to split over this, one side blindly affirming & not asking the hard questions, then us. Any encouragement or feedback would be greatly appreciated. We are facing so much confusion & doubt over whether we made the right decision or not as it's the hardest decision we've ever made & the most tragic thing we've ever been through. In the end though we abide by what is happening to our children & young people & the most vulnerable in our society. I see this same story played out again and again like it's right out of the same playbook.
So sorry - we are living the same nightmare and this is exactly what I’m planning to say. Hoping this will make her pause and see that it’s better to wait. What if she’s wrong? Why can’t they hit pause? So much kudos and encouragement from the peer group?? She also has ADHD, on the spectrum, anxiety etc. It makes me sick to my stomach to think she will lose her beautiful singing voice and never get it back. But I fear she’ll leave too - turns 18 next week. It’s breaking my heart. So many of us in this awful situation. I just can’t really quite believe it’s happening 😞 Thinking of you all in solidarity and sadness.
Yes. You did the right thing. Speaking as a clinical psychologist (30 years) and as a mum of someone who says they are 'Gay non binary', I cannot re-iterate enough. DO NOT AFFIRM!
It will make your stepson worse. Believe it or not, he needs the anchor of you in your life, but he doesn't realise it yet. He will eventually return to sanity (because biology and millions of years of evolutionary programming will overcome an illogical ideology). When he does, he will need the anchor that you will provide.
Currently he is undergoing what I am increasingly beginning to see as a prolonged psychotic episode. You and your partner alone cannot overcome the influence the Trans industry has on your stepson. Trying to do so will only devastate you and make you feel increasingly ineffectual and desperate. You're going to have to wait this one out, but with your principles intact. My motto is 'Hold Firm....Do Not Affirm'.
I can't tell you how encouraging your comment was, just to hear a clinical psychologist tell us these words. Thank you for taking the time. The entire family on that side is now attacking us & scrutinizing our every word & post on social media, including de-friending us which is so childish. It feels like nowhere is safe & we are being cancelled for standing up for the truth & what's in his best interest.
It’s awful!! I’m so sorry! My son is also not driving, has never had a girlfriend, is a gifted coder, self taught. I believe he is on the autism spectrum, although he’s not been formally diagnosed. He does have ADHD, late onset ocd, and anxiety. Our vulnerable children are being preyed upon. I wish I knew exactly by whom in my son’s case
My heart aches for you! Your son was taken away from you by a evil cult. I hope that soon these cultists will be having to answer for the harm they have done.In the coming years, I hope that there will be lawsuits against those doctors and pharma companies that have profited off the bodies of so many children! I believe that truth in the end will prevail and this nightmare will end. It has to!
What is going on with these boys that this grabs them at all the same time? Is it sexual or not? Iatrogenesis seems to be at play which I have to believe is coming from early exposure to online porn... but the cultural elements at play are immense. I still believe an event in their own life causes them to seek out this coping mechanism. This is a coping mechanism for shame and to avoid pain or inflicting pain as a male. There are so many layers to all things trans. We just have to keep pulling back the onion. It is going to be a long journey so we must stick together and work together to heal from this dreadful human experiment!
Sounds a lot like my story. Except yours got a job. My son, I found out after prom when a Band mom broke the news to me. That was 7 years ago. He moved out 3 years later, now is supposed to be in Law school, bit skipped semesters. He is a different person. Castration, breast implants, has cut me off. He says I really don't love him. He is my whole world. And, no matter what I do or say is not good enough or too late. He is all I have.
I am so horribly sorry. I lost two daughters, one in particular.
I really feel for you & your family I have a similar story. I am in the Uk my son 17 has socially transitioned for about 5-6 years now. I just can’t seem to get through to him. He is an intelligent beautiful human & I just pray constantly that he will see the lie for what it is & come through before any lasting damage is done. He is living at home at the moment. Wanting to become a commercial pilot ( I’m not sure if his being trans will be detrimental to his career choice although looking at the virgin advertisment maybe not ) he is quiet strongly a Christian & we are just trying to love him through this.
My heart goes out to you!! We adopted two boys that are now young men and although we had our issues they never doubted or questioned that they were boys. Sometimes those of us that don't go through what you have need to understand how blessed we are!
As a mother of four I understand your heartbreak. Raising children is a real challenge and a great learning experience. In 1979 I wrote a 300 page manuscript on raising chldren with 23 years of experience. It didn't go because the AMA did not approve as I did not have a Doctorate. The publisher needed to get the approval of the AMA. I am sure the AMA would not approve, because of what I had written about vaccines from first hand experience; and the incompetency of the pediatrician, which led to a very sickly child. I was young and naive; and knew nothing about nutrition. M son's doctor told me what to feed my son from the time he was born. I had intended to nurse, but was given pills in the hospital which dried up my milk. When I questioned the nurse about the pills she handed me, she snapped at me, "The doctor ordered them. Take them!" I obeyed instantly, then I found out what they were. I cried for three days. I knew mother's milk was the best. Then, the formula the pediatrician told me to give the baby was totally deficient in nutrients and the child screamed for 3 months. Being ignorant about nutrition...I didn't know what was wrong. I didnt wake up, until he was 4-1/2, when a good friend handed me books and told me to start reading. After opening the first book, my entire life changed. It was that eureka moment! For 62 years I have been on a search for the truth. There are so many lies that if things don't change there will be no more problems...the world will be gone. I am writing a free substack entitled Journey to Wellness...based on health and nutrition research I have done, since 1961, I want to give people the benefit of my personal , non-funded research: barbaracharis.substack.com
All I can say is, "I'm sorry!" In a way, I'm glad others have a similar story. I don't have to feel so alone. But, I would rather be alone in this than have so many other children and parents hurting. So, once again, "I'm sorry!"
Thank you for your article. I am struggling with nearly the exact same situation and I feel so alone. I have lost my sweet boy to brainwashing and indoctrination. He is angry, spiteful, and defensive in all aspects of conversation. I don’t know where he is living. His thoughts make no sense and I can tell, if we talk, his answers are scripted. His medication and ideals were encouraged by the college he attends. That WE paid for (no longer). He is ruined forever. There is no happy ending. I appreciate your words so I don’t feel so alone.
You're not alone but I do understand the feeling entirely. Just keeping loving him, he knows in his heart what's right and I'm hopeful they will come around.
Brilliant, and well done. I’m in Edinburgh but if there’s any way I can get there, I will. Primark is absolutely irresponsible. So is childline it seems.
Joining terf calender now. It’s a fab idea as they always seem to be one step ahead.
Well done you, I’m assuming you may be linked with posy? Really well done for all that we so need to collectively go for the same target.
This will get you on the GC path. Lots of good names here: https://michaelnayna.substack.com/p/word-from-london
London is where TERFs are most organised and active. !
In US: have you come across MassResistance.org? Kara Dansky? International Women's Declaration? HandsAcrossTheAisle - Women in Coalition?
Here in the UK we have a campaigning group called Sex-Matters..org who cover the range of harms from Gender Identity Ideology - see their list of links to allied campaigns.
There are now many "Gender Critical" therapists in UK. E.g. "genspect" and "Thoughtful Therapists".
The UK's Equality and Human Rights Commission is headed by a Chair who understands the harms from GI.
Apart from the civil servants in Dept for Education, the Conservative Gov in UK now understands that it must debate and discuss this issue. On June 12th there will be a Parliamentary debate in an off-site Chamber on two petitions (1) That the word sex in the Equality Act 2010 means "biological sex" and (2) the opposite - a demand to keep the confused state of the meaning of sex.
A group of 10 parents is crowdfunding for a legal action against the Dept for Education to stop the indoctrination with GI ideology in state schools. This will be a very important legal case.
Please act in concert with other parents, women, gays and lesbians, etc. all those harmed by GI ideology.
Sorry. I just looked up MassResistance.org, and it is not what I thought. Please look up Gender Critical campaigners in US, especially Women's Declaration International. https://www.womensdeclaration.com/en/
Yeah, Mass Resistance are pretty much on the extremes, and may not be a good ally.
It will fall under the weight of its own illogicality and viciousness. All of these crazy ideologies do eventually. Imagine you are, say, living in France in 1941. The Nazis seem all powerful and unstoppable, but they were gone by 1945. Same for Maoism, communism etc etc. More to the point, Trans isn't about concepts such as who owns capital or the redistribution of resources. It is attacking the very nature of reality and the way in which we hominids have ordered societies since we before Homo Sapiens became the dominant species. It will eventually fall when it reaches a tipping point.
I'm in the UK, otherwise known as Terf Island. We are beginning to see changes here. Our Tory government will hopefully repeal the egregious Gender Recognition Act, which allowed all of this insanity. Our PM is a Terf and we got rid of the Scottish First Minister over self-id and we're getting the Tavistock closed down. And we have Posie Parker and LWS.
Elsewhere the struggle continues, I know. But I think it was instructive that Megyn Kelly has gone full Terf. As has Elon Musk. But it's going to happen from the bottom up. The sheer groundswell and numbers of families who have had to endure the destruction of the nuclear bomb that is Trans ideology will eventually spill over into wider public consciousness. Its just a matter of time. If you are on Twitter, look for @terfcalendar. We are going to start a global (western) walk-out of schools on the last Friday of every month, to protest Trans.
Stay strong. Dont be discouraged. Get hold of some stickers and plaster them anywhere you see Trans propaganda. It's about raising awareness and shifting positions one person at a time until we reach a critical mass.
Thanks for that. When the end of the trans delusion happens, where do you see all these lost teens/young adults that have estranged themselves from their families for not affirming?
That's a really good question. Unlike historical equivalents when kids have gone mad en masse, like the Hitler Youth, or Red Guard or Kosmosol, these kids have, many of them, been altered by chemicals. Everyone focuses on the impact of PBs and X-sex hormones on primary and secondary sexual characteristics. But I've seen almost nothing said about brain development. In adolescence the brain goes through a massive period of growth and 'pruning' of the neural synapses. Crucially Myelin is laid down in the frontal cortex. This process allows for the development of higher-order cognitive skills, ie meta-cognition (thinking about thinking ) and Executive Functioning skills (planning, impulse control etc). Absolutely NOBODY knows how PBs and X-sex impact on these functions. It's what makes their use even more egregious, never mind micor-penisis and no breast tissue!
So, to answer your question, I think the youngsters who have taken hormones will likely be brain-damaged. How this will manifest is unknown. But I believe they will not be able to operate as fully functional, responsible and entirely independent adults. They will remain infantalised, or they may all develop sociopathy, or dementia even. Nobody knows! I think that when the current Trans madness ends and their friends abandon them, they will return home to be cared for by their ever-suffering parents. They may need to be looked after in some way for the rest of their lives - or they may come through neurobiologically unscathed (although I doubt that - the brain is extremely sensitive to environmental 'insults').
Then there are those who have done irreversible surgeries. They too will have lifelong psychological problems, and who will look after them - their parents and families, that's who.
When you see interviews with old Hitler Youth or Red Guard types, they describe it as if they were in a 'fog'. They look back at their younger selves with disbelief and incredulity. The problem here is that the whole edifice of Trans has to fall first, before these youngsters return to sanity. But it will. It cannot last. 'Gender Dysphoria' is not real. It's a mass psychogenic illness.
I pray so much of what you are predicting is true Pamela! May you be the sage you seem... this can not be sustainable! The damage to everyone is mounting so quickly - how can other not see it?
Hi, I’m in the uk too and it’s really heartening to read your post. It seems we are beginning to make some heAdway here - it can’t come soon enough as our daughter has been sucked into leaving home to be with trans partner - and now I see childline/ primark are encouraging this.
Thank goodness for terfs.
Lovely to hear from you. Please follow @terfcalendar on Twitter. We are protesting outside Primark in Oxford Street, London next Wednesday if you can join us!
I forgot to add in my previous response that the Bud Light debacle shows that the wind is going out of this. Plus all of the companies getting castigated on Twitter for featuring the Pride flag. And don't forget Oxfam having to change that insulting video and apologise. Plus Lia Thomas's teamate going public.
We are trying to coordinate responses to companies on social media, so that we all, collectively. go for the same target. Just in the process of trying to organise this will some other people. If you're not on Twitter, I would advise you to join. I've only recently started. But you can get a lot of information there. Also, make a Whatsapp group with a few Terfy friends. Give each other mutual support. Otherwise you will continue to feel powerless and overhwhelmed by the Trans juggernaut.
I was on Twitter for the past two years. I worked a LOT of my anger out on that forum. It was very helpful as it was the only place I could find sane, rational responses to kids being sacrificed to the trans gods. But then a couple of months ago I decided to delete my account as I feeling toxic. I may join again… there are many days I miss knowing what is going on and being terfy ;)
Absolutely heartbreaking. No way in HELL would my child attend a public school.
I have major regrets, now that it's too late. The brainwashing happened behind our backs! Homeschool may be the only way to avoid this bs ideology now!
My 13 year old is home-schooled for this very reason. Schools are a breeding ground for this contagion.
You are a wise mama.
Thank you for sharing your family's story. I got a chill up my spine when you wrote that kids at your son's school called non-gay, non-trans kids "breeders" -- OMG!!! You said you haven't found any help online. If that is still the case, let us know. I'm sure many people following the PITT substack can share links and contacts with you. Being with other parents living through similar tragedy is very, very helpful, and you can have that.
Neither kids nor anyone else can just be 'gay' anymore b/c 'gay' is sex-based and sex itself no longer matters. The legacy LGB orgs have been taken over by 'trans' activist ideologues and redefined gays and lesbians as 'same-gender' attracted instead of 'same-sex' attracted. The invented and incoherent 'gender identity' is based on no material reality and supersedes the material reality-based category of sex. So no homosexuality or heterosexuality--it is all about 'gender identity' ideology and its 'born in the wrong body' 'faith-based' belief.
And same-gender attracted means that lesbians have male, heterosexual cross-dresser sexual fetishists, autogynephiles/transvestic fetishists, who claim to be lesbian vilifying them for not sleeping w/ them--it is misogyny and homophobia on stilts.
It is not homophobic to call out this pernicious 'trans' (TQ) fiction b/c being LGB requires no fraudulent pronouns or hormonal and surgical mutilation--that is the 'gender identity' nonsense that the 'trans' activists try to conflate and confuse w/ sex and sexuality and that some vulnerable LGBs with their internalized homophobia fall victim to and come to regret.
Exactly right. Trans Activists are fully aware that acceptance for lesbians and gays is grassroots and widespread. And they know that 'trans' does NOT enjoy the same widespread acceptance. The satanic marketing plan of 'joining' the TQ with gays and lesbians, it has benefited the TQ, and has been horrific for gays and lesbians.
When a gay person comes out: 'im ready to tell the truth about myself.'
When a trans-identified person comes out: 'im ready to tell lies about myself.'
When a gay person comes out: 'im ready to tell the truth about myself.'
When a trans-identified person comes out: 'im ready to tell lies about myself.'
Quite right. When a 'trans' person says that he/she must be his/her 'authentic' self and then proceeds to use a fake name, fraudulent pronouns, and sometimes synthetic, exogenous, cross-sex hormones and cosmetic/plastic surgeries I can't think of how they could be any more inauthentic than that. If you need all of those interventions to be your 'authentic' self you need to rethink what you are doing.
And the irony of this 'trans' 'gender identity' lunacy is that it is in service to the primary drivers of this 'trans' movement who are male, heterosexual, cross-dresser sexual fetishists, autogynephiles/transvestic fetishists, men w/ paraphilias. They are, as Helen Joyce, author of the book, 'Trans, When Ideology Meets Reality,' the "nuclear reactor" of the trans movement w/o which it would not have advanced as it has. There are very wealthy, powerful heterosexual men who have an 'erotic fixation' and are determined to drive the invented and incoherent 'gender identity' ideology wherever they can b/c of it. And they have invented the 'trans child' to cover what is a sexual paraphilia. See this relevant part of one of Joyce's interviews here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8xUrtNW6Fzo&t=664s
And see https://www.transwidowsvoices.org/our-voices and also see https://fairplayforwomen.com/pronouns/ and why no person should use deceptive pronouns.
And of course Sweden, Finland, Norway, and England, to name some of the countries that have done a systematic review of the evidence--or lack thereof--re 'transitioning' minors, and have ceased 'transitioning' minors except under clinical protocols. 'Transitioning' should be outlawed entirely, imo, and the only credible follow-up study has shown the suicide rate is 19x higher post-transition when compared w/ matched population controls. And the emotional blackmail claim that kids will kill themselves if not 'transitioned' is 'trans' activists propaganda to scare parents into 'transing' their minor children. This is a dangerous, pernicious movement that is misogynist and homophobic to its core and no self-respecting woman or LGB supports it.
It's funny that some people seem to have a hard time believing in autogynephilia. Like it's somehow 'too strange to be believed.'
I remember sitcoms from a couple decades ago making veiled cross-dressing jokes. And the jokes landed. People laughed. A bit uncomfortably, but we understood 'what IT was'. Which is erotic cross-dressing: autogynephilia. We understood that 'being turned on by pretending to be a woman' was A THING with some men. We understood this strange quirk as a culture. And we felt mostly fine about it, since it was something these men understandably did behind closed doors. At that point it was not yet slithering its diseased tentacles into our world.
Where are the cross-dressing jokes in entertainment now? Little too on the nose in today's cultural climate I guess. Trans Identified Males put so much of their time and effort into silencing the truth about this. Thank God it's becoming more widely known, regardless of their sad efforts to 'dupe the world.'
Will, I think for some people the 'penny hasn't dropped' on the AGP/TvF
re the 'trans' 'gender identity' movement. I think many people (if they are even aware of these men in the movement b/c it is the dirty secret that is not discussed as it should be) really do believe the nonsense that the cross-dressing is just for comfort or b/c they are just more 'feminine' inside and not an arousing sexual fetish. More people are becoming aware of that fact now through social media but those of us who have researched it in the medical/psych literature or have encountered it in IRL know what it is.
And I think many people still think the 'trans' movement is Gay 2.0 and that all of the men pretending to be women have had genital surgery when most have not. And that AGPs are not the more 'girly' boys who often grow up to be gay. Those are still misunderstandings about these men and the 'trans' movement. The LGB movement was hi-jacked in service to these heterosexual men and so many people think all LGBs are onboard w/ the 'trans' agenda and clearly that is not the case.
Unfortunately some gays and lesbians have gotten caught up in the 'trans' cult often to their great regret or cluelessly support it but they will no doubt have a rude awakening about that one day. They are like the turkeys invited to the table at Thanksgiving except they are on the menu. I simultaneously have anger at them and empathy for them.
As to the jokes, apparently you can say nothing about 'trans' w/o being disappeared. I had to specifically search for Ricky Gervais on Netflix to find his specials even though I had watched them previously. And a google search for 'male comedians' did not even bring up his name. I suppose the 'statute of limitations' will never run out for his 'crime' of saying "her penis" in his stand-up routine b/c apparently telling the truth about an absurdity is no joke.
I am also angry at gay people who are not actively questioning the trans cult. But I also know that there are quite a few gay people who are desperate for a political home and terrified to be ejected from friend groups who might not yet be questioning The Cult. I am more fearless regarding my politics, but there are lots of gay people who are a bit fragile, and they are not so fearless. It takes strength to face the horrible truth: that the TQ Cult glommed onto gay and lesbian grassroots acceptance in the early 2000s in order to siphon off that acceptance for themselves. And the most destructive profile of the entire TQ cult: autogynephile males. STRAIGHT MEN.
We are living through some Strange Days, that's for sure.
ps: I posted this article before from the 'Atlantic' re the rebranding to 'transgender' for commentary/critique/educational purposes and post it again in case you have not seen it. No doubt it would not be printed today but fortunately it has been archived. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BkIQTu7BV2nifZ3sbSFpS7spWb9od3YU/view
Thank you. I have found a few since connecting here. Seeing the confusion in his once sure eyes is heartbreaking. That's my baby boy and if I could change things with a snap of a finger I would, but I can't. He's hitting a lot of road block in his life journey that I'm hopeful will lead him home again and back on the right path, but I won't hold my breath. I will just continue to love him but not play these made up games.
Day after day, everyday, trying to find a way to bear the the unbearable.
Yep - nailed it! Who knew this was going to be a part of the modern parenting journey? I so resonate with the author's experience of you are not educated and too old to understand... I get this from both of my kids, one trans, the other just enmeshed in sexual identities... they are of a certain generation that was raised on the internet where Pokemon evolution became real in front of them. I pray the true story of tumblr, Reddit, etc... gets more and more traction. I blame the online culture for so much of this. I have come to believe these identities were a response to early exposure to porn. If you think about it they are almost used as shields to protect themselves. I am trying to find curiosity and compassion for their experience, but mostly it just pisses me off that they are so ridiculously brainwashed!
I get very angry with my daughter too sometimes, for being such a gullible idiot. It’s not pretty but there it is anyway, a real feeling I am not allowed to have/express.
Our stories are so similar. We just found out our 19 year old autistic son with multiple other mental health issues was able to secretly obtain estrogen from a planned parenthood out of state with 1 short visit over the phone with the help of much older adults in an attempt to chemically castrate himself. We had made our rules on this very clear from the time we learned about this right before his 18th birthday (like so many others are coached to do), when he very suddenly identified as a woman & we were informed by much older family members (who both spoke for him). We told him from the beginning we loved him & that would never change, even though we didn't believe in gender theory as he does. We told him we would help him gain more independence so he could get out on his own, but our only firm rule from the beginning was that he could not live in our home & us pay for everything & him be on mind-altering hormones while he isn't emotionally or mentally mature enough to make a decision like this. There's so much he can't do that his peers can do, yet he thinks he is ready for this? He's never been in love or had a sexual relationship but he's ready for this? We begged him to stop & even told him we would do all these things to equip him so that in a few years when he's able to live on his own he could make that kind of decision & pay for it himself. We were hoping our ultimatum would wake him up & motivate him to focus on bettering himself, not further handicapping himself. Instead, he left that night to go live with the older family members. Of course he is telling everyone we kicked him out because he is trans which is not the case. We gave him a choice to live here but not on hormones, not while he can't possibly understand the longterm ramifications. Now I'm afraid the family is going to split over this, one side blindly affirming & not asking the hard questions, then us. Any encouragement or feedback would be greatly appreciated. We are facing so much confusion & doubt over whether we made the right decision or not as it's the hardest decision we've ever made & the most tragic thing we've ever been through. In the end though we abide by what is happening to our children & young people & the most vulnerable in our society. I see this same story played out again and again like it's right out of the same playbook.
So sorry - we are living the same nightmare and this is exactly what I’m planning to say. Hoping this will make her pause and see that it’s better to wait. What if she’s wrong? Why can’t they hit pause? So much kudos and encouragement from the peer group?? She also has ADHD, on the spectrum, anxiety etc. It makes me sick to my stomach to think she will lose her beautiful singing voice and never get it back. But I fear she’ll leave too - turns 18 next week. It’s breaking my heart. So many of us in this awful situation. I just can’t really quite believe it’s happening 😞 Thinking of you all in solidarity and sadness.
Yes. You did the right thing. Speaking as a clinical psychologist (30 years) and as a mum of someone who says they are 'Gay non binary', I cannot re-iterate enough. DO NOT AFFIRM!
It will make your stepson worse. Believe it or not, he needs the anchor of you in your life, but he doesn't realise it yet. He will eventually return to sanity (because biology and millions of years of evolutionary programming will overcome an illogical ideology). When he does, he will need the anchor that you will provide.
Currently he is undergoing what I am increasingly beginning to see as a prolonged psychotic episode. You and your partner alone cannot overcome the influence the Trans industry has on your stepson. Trying to do so will only devastate you and make you feel increasingly ineffectual and desperate. You're going to have to wait this one out, but with your principles intact. My motto is 'Hold Firm....Do Not Affirm'.
Good luck!
I can't tell you how encouraging your comment was, just to hear a clinical psychologist tell us these words. Thank you for taking the time. The entire family on that side is now attacking us & scrutinizing our every word & post on social media, including de-friending us which is so childish. It feels like nowhere is safe & we are being cancelled for standing up for the truth & what's in his best interest.
It’s awful!! I’m so sorry! My son is also not driving, has never had a girlfriend, is a gifted coder, self taught. I believe he is on the autism spectrum, although he’s not been formally diagnosed. He does have ADHD, late onset ocd, and anxiety. Our vulnerable children are being preyed upon. I wish I knew exactly by whom in my son’s case
So similar... our son too has been preyed upon by someone online, I believe much much older
I think this story needs more attention - this seems to ring true more for ROGD boys.
I agree!!!
My heart aches for you! Your son was taken away from you by a evil cult. I hope that soon these cultists will be having to answer for the harm they have done.In the coming years, I hope that there will be lawsuits against those doctors and pharma companies that have profited off the bodies of so many children! I believe that truth in the end will prevail and this nightmare will end. It has to!