34 Comments
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Donna's avatar

Good grief! What is a 12 year old lesbian? I'm now completely convinced. The Victorians had it right.

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Grandma Eileen's avatar

Thank you for your encouraging story. Transgender is indeed a serious life race. I hope that your daughter will stay stable and focused on her future. You did a great job helping her to navigate this race. You gave us hope. I believe she will win this race!

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Luc's avatar

So how do you get her to recognize that the mental health issues are what what made all of Identity issues front and center? That it will is really the mental health that you need to take care of?

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Notes from the Under Dog L.'s avatar

Why was she on SSRI’s? Since 7th grade? The road to medicalization began at that moment.

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Un-silent's avatar

Interesting story, especially about the couple your children met at the Renaissance Fair. Why did they come so far to meet with your kids? I have been reading another substack "BX writes from BX's substack" which talks about acceleration groups. On that substack the groups are Satanist cults that trap young people online and get them to do terrible things which accelerate over time. Many kids end up with mental issues or commit crimes. It makes one wonder if there are different types of acceleration groups (possibly for trans/LGBTQ) that brainwash kids. All of the stories here are similar in being that the children change in extreme ways, turn on their parents, and consider permanent physical solutions. There are many predators on social media so this is definitely a possibility.

I am happy that your daughter is doing better now and I hope she can make a full recovery. Not too thrilled with them using Ketamine, but I hope that is just a temporary step towards total recovery free from all drugs.

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Mark Christenson's avatar

Praying for y’all to keep moving to right direction, to her accepting herself as a female.

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DareToBeTruthful's avatar

Thank you for sharing your story. If she is college-bound, be very thoughtful about where you tour and where she applies. Perhaps start quietly researching this now.

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Mara U.'s avatar

“They even disclosed that they have needed to meet with several students who claimed sexual assault, sexual harassment, and rape-culture. When what these kids really experienced was flirting.”

I get how someone could consider flirting to be sexual harassment, but how would someone consider flirting to be sexual assault?

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Kimberly Ells's avatar

What a heart wrenching but hopeful story!! I’m so glad she’s doing better and rediscovering herself. You have been a hero even through your anguish.

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Beeswax's avatar

One of the most interesting things about your story is that you found a non-affirming psychotherapist right away. This is rare. It didn't do much good in the long run, because social pressure is much more powerful than the hard work of getting to know yourself with the help of an adult stranger. Nevertheless, it bought you some time, and your daughter seems to be maturing out of her obsession. One day she'll look back on these years and thank you for your steadfast commitment and love for her.

By the way, ketamine can have toxic effects. I'm glad to hear she's not relying on it.

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/uk-news/drug-left-mum-27-needing-31385436

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Hotgambler's avatar

Dad of a self-harming, desisted ROGD, now 20.

1. I let her smoke cannabis for her issues. I wanted mushroom therapy, but she resisted. I wanted a stellate ganglion block, but she resisted. No way would I ever allow T. I was tough and her mom followed.

2. We watched fantasy shows as a family, featuring strong kick-ass females. “Wednesday,” “Wheel of Time,”Captain Marvel,” etc. It worked around/ after age 18. When my baby put her hair in Wednesday Addams pigtails, I could finally relax.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

2

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PITT's avatar

Have you joined parentsofdesisters.info?

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Erica Weinstein's avatar

Thank Gd her health is improving! Not sure about ketamine, but I know it’s taken off as a mental health treatment in the past decade. Two cents: revel in all of the healthy changes that have occurred & share how you feel about the part she played/plays in them. Continue to focus on her strengths & make time to go on a few fun adventures together (especially outdoors).

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Average Dad's avatar

Wow! Great story, boy have times changed for the worse when it comes to parents getting their children safely through adolescence/puberty. How can we reverse this. I think this Mom/Family is doing great, ketamine seems extreme but I am open minded. I don't like that so many are on SSI's to begin with, I am very against these drugs.

The only advice I would give is to listen to Stephanie Winn and check out her resources and podcasts.

https://course.rogdrepair.com/p/rogd-repair

Stephanie has done many great podcasts to garner knowledge and wisdom for us all on Trans issues especially.

Her latest one is an absolute must listen, it will give you hope.

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-must-be-some-kind-of-therapist/id1612777134?i=1000702482224

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CA mom's avatar

I love your story, thank you. It brings so much hope. It sounds like your daughter is on the trajectory out of this thing, thanks to your persistence and her internal resources.

I read another account of a teen, who through a psychedelic experience with LSD, came to the conclusion she was not trans.

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Helene's avatar

Wow. PITT parents are super moms and dads. Just reading the whole ordeal makes me feel tired. I have to say it's looking real good. All your patient love, time and $ invested in her mental health and all the crappy experiences she went through and came out of with sorted feelings and been-there-done-that vibes are gonna play in her favor when her true identity and sense of self are threatened in the future. Best wishes to all of you 💗

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LovingMother's avatar

I dunno. I have a great relationship with my daughter again. But, she's started the T cream anyway.

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Beeswax's avatar

No, it can't be. After all this time?

Social contagion can be incredibly powerful, especially when social alternatives are so slim. I wish you optimism, fortitude and patience.

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LovingMother's avatar

As soon as she had her own insurance... Crazy that it is paid for in this way.

Their minds are taken young with the indoctrination.

Thank you very much, Beeswax. - LM

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Helene's avatar

Oh no

That makes no sense

I pray she'll eventually feel well enough in her skin that she'll totally snap out of it all

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GenderRealistMom's avatar

I made a mistake of putting my daughter on antidepressants when she was 14. I weaned her off them when she was 16, but several years later I still wonder if it affected her brain permanently. I wish I just let her ride out her painful teen angst. I wonder how many of us start medical treatments - antidepressants, ketamine, etc in our complete and total desperation. Please check out this excellent essay https://news.fairforall.org/p/the-dangerous-ssri-experiment-on

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