I’ve been in my child’s discord. It’s unreal. I’m not a dummy to computers and apps, and I’m not a pro. Discord is very confusing and difficult to get a grasp on! It’s insane how many chat groups and sub chats and video calls there are.
Even if you can figure Discord out, well you can’t even understand what they are saying to each other. It’s like another language what they text to each other. Half of it doesn’t even make sense and it is not searchable to find the meanings of what they are saying.
The memes they send each other are also just as confusing. They don’t make sense.
The some channels I saw are very dark and depressing as well as sexual.
Breakdowns in Discord (idk what to call it a servers) usually include #vent #rant These were filled with depressing content for people complaining, venting about life. It was so negative and extremely unproductive. On LGBTQ+ Discord servers there was many about how awful parents are and hormones and transitioning. So many comments about “I don’t know if I’m trans” and everyone else would jump in and love bomb them and place blame on others.
Give a gifted autistic child a computer and they gain more computer skills than you.
We stand a chance of pulling the next cohort of kids out of the dark and sinister recesses of the internet. OUr kids were the first cohort, guinea pigs. We didn't know what we didn't know. Now we know there are dangers around every corner.
While I agree with this rational approach there is one thing in the list of steps that I wholeheartedly disagree with. "Educate ourselves, learn the platforms our kids use, especially private and invite-only spaces."
Kids and private, invite only spaces do not mix. I will not just learn about these platforms I will 100% veto them in my house. I am grateful that parents with children older than mine are figuring this out and sharing what they know so I can manage it before it is a part of my children's lives at all.
And this is exactly why I've read as many as 70% of those who got into the whole trans thing were on the autism spectrum. Kids on the spectrum find it a lot easier to fit in online and therefore in many instances tend to spend a lot more time there...and of course when covid hit ALL the kids were spending a lot more time online. I will say though that there have been a lot of these people that are being caught. Some have been in the news and I'm sure some not. Good law enforcement people are getting into these groups and catching these people. The problem is way bigger than anyone knows. Today I was listening to Julie Green speaking about how judgement begins in the house of the Lord. All you have to do is google "pastor arrested for child porn" and see how many there are...and those are just the ones that have been arrested. Sadly, our country and really those around the world have been infiltrated by wicked people...every aspect of our life, education, politics, music and entertainment, business, and worst of all the church and I believe those in the church are the ones we will see fall first. We are about to witness something huge....and although it might be ugly to see when it's happening the end result will be absolutely awesome. It reminds me of lyrics my son made up in a video that can be found on YouTube by searching "Silver Wire Minoa". (It's 3:34 long posted in January). It's a fun song and a little comical....and honestly perhaps somewhat prophetic? I listened to his lyrics in other songs over and over again trying to understand what was going on his head! He went through a lot that I don't really know about...and at this point I don't really need to. He is healing and that's what matters...and healing is coming for all the rest of these kids and young adults as well!
I don’t know exactly how it works but you can buy steam cards I think it’s like a store for online games. As a whole I’m of the opinion that the majority of if not all video games are bad😞. I wish I could have a do over!
Right- thanks Brenda. I agree with you. My intuition at the time said 'ooo- almost porn...' so many times with the stuff my child was getting into. I thought it was my generation, other parents said 'you'll have to let go a bit... it's just the way things are, but now I see many years later that I was right. And I'm no prude.
Yes, and create a new, different email, social media profile/account for investigation. Screenshot for documentation as you see things that are not okay.
It is alarming that parents don't really know about social platforms and about language related to trans ideology. It's alarming because you can't object to things you don't know about. I wrote an article before where I talk about several online platforms but even I don't know them all https://www.pittparents.com/p/online-trans-ideology . I identified as trans as a teen I have since desisted I used to use a site called TrevorSpace which I don't think most people know. You may or may not have heard of the Trevor Project it is affiliated with them. It's public but the moderation is horrible and I think that when you have a site explicitly for suicial children you have a duty to moderate properly and protect them and I believe they have failed. I think its important to be aware and keep dialogue going, especially to encourage debate and teach not to fear others opinions. I think it can protect you from alienation and information control if you're able to spot it yourself, but I don't think its fool proof. There is a problem with discord as their chats are not really moderated. There is a report feature but nobody else will see your chat unless you report it, so kids on there are vulnerable to grooming. Groomers try to make you comfortable with them so that you don't see anything wrong with them when they abuse you. I know with trans groups specifically its often for people to refer to each other as their family, saying "If your parents don't support you I'm your mom/dad now" and saying they're safe people. I'm weary of it all since desisting if you were a "safe" person you wouldn't have to say that, and "safe" people aren't desperate for the trust of minors. You may or may not know of Schlep if you don't he was a predator catcher on Roblox who was banned from the platform and is now exposing Roblox covering for pedophiles and working on lawsuits. He said specifically that Roblox should cut all association with Discord. He says kids were abducted by people on discord by links they accessed through roblox. I say that because I generally trust what he has to say on online predators and its important to note that with discord its more than just trans ideology when it comes to abuse
I say judge, judge often, and apply everything life has taught you in your judgment. Otherwise you remain in infancy.
“Trans” is sick. Start there. It needs to be treated away, not “affirmed.” A boy who thinks he wants his genitalia removed is a sick boy. Learn to see that sickness and drop all the “respect their choices” garbage.
Healthy people have no distinction between gender and sex, and sex is binary and immutable.
I understand your point, and I agree that discernment and judgment are part of maturity. We are called to recognize what is right and what is wrong, no question about that.
What I meant by saying “without judgment” isn’t that we shouldn’t judge at all. It’s that if our tone or approach makes someone feel judged personally, they shut down. And once they shut down, the bridge of communication is gone.
This is a very sensitive and confused generation. Many of them are lost, and the moment they feel attacked, they retreat into online spaces where the only voices they hear are the ones reinforcing their confusion. Then we lose the chance to speak truth into their lives.
So yes, we should absolutely hold firm convictions and let them know where we stand. But at the same time, we need to approach them in a way that keeps the door open, calm, loving, and steady, so they know they can come back and talk.
The original meaning of "discriminate" is also positive, like the word "judgment." The ability to accurately discriminate one thing from another is a measure of basic intelligence.
It's hard to understand how a parent or other caring adult could listen to a teenager talk about spending time in dangerous places without making judgments. One can avoid judging one's children's character of course, but judgments about a creepy Discord channel would probably be inevitable. And teenagers are often very vigilant about the nonverbal expressions of parental judgments. So, the question of when to say them out loud and in what words still requires practical answers.
I do wonder if that would stop them it may work on social media sites but I think it would be hard to do with discord specifically because it is just full of private chats with invite links you can find anywhere, it would be impossible to catch them all and even if you get in a private chat any particular chat can range very innocent to straight up criminal content. I used to use a site called TrevorSpace as a kid and now I have an account that I use just to screenshot what they're saying as evidence of abuse. People can call me whatever they want for that causes some people act like child abuse is fine but calling it out is "creepy". But its a little different cause the site is 13-24 for lgbtq+ people im 18 and gay there's no reason I can't be there, even if they don't like getting exposed
Thank you for this comment. Truthfully I knew nothing about Discord or TrevorSpace and just recently learned about them after Charlie Kirk was assassinated. Perhaps people should try to get those sites shut down. I do not know the answer I’m just overwhelmed because my son is trans and I feel helpless to get thru t him. I hate to see other kids teens and young adults get hurt by these monsters.
They will never be able to concentrate or focus. Short paragraphs and bullet lists will be the limit of their reading.
I’ve been in my child’s discord. It’s unreal. I’m not a dummy to computers and apps, and I’m not a pro. Discord is very confusing and difficult to get a grasp on! It’s insane how many chat groups and sub chats and video calls there are.
Even if you can figure Discord out, well you can’t even understand what they are saying to each other. It’s like another language what they text to each other. Half of it doesn’t even make sense and it is not searchable to find the meanings of what they are saying.
The memes they send each other are also just as confusing. They don’t make sense.
The some channels I saw are very dark and depressing as well as sexual.
Breakdowns in Discord (idk what to call it a servers) usually include #vent #rant These were filled with depressing content for people complaining, venting about life. It was so negative and extremely unproductive. On LGBTQ+ Discord servers there was many about how awful parents are and hormones and transitioning. So many comments about “I don’t know if I’m trans” and everyone else would jump in and love bomb them and place blame on others.
Give a gifted autistic child a computer and they gain more computer skills than you.
We stand a chance of pulling the next cohort of kids out of the dark and sinister recesses of the internet. OUr kids were the first cohort, guinea pigs. We didn't know what we didn't know. Now we know there are dangers around every corner.
While I agree with this rational approach there is one thing in the list of steps that I wholeheartedly disagree with. "Educate ourselves, learn the platforms our kids use, especially private and invite-only spaces."
Kids and private, invite only spaces do not mix. I will not just learn about these platforms I will 100% veto them in my house. I am grateful that parents with children older than mine are figuring this out and sharing what they know so I can manage it before it is a part of my children's lives at all.
And this is exactly why I've read as many as 70% of those who got into the whole trans thing were on the autism spectrum. Kids on the spectrum find it a lot easier to fit in online and therefore in many instances tend to spend a lot more time there...and of course when covid hit ALL the kids were spending a lot more time online. I will say though that there have been a lot of these people that are being caught. Some have been in the news and I'm sure some not. Good law enforcement people are getting into these groups and catching these people. The problem is way bigger than anyone knows. Today I was listening to Julie Green speaking about how judgement begins in the house of the Lord. All you have to do is google "pastor arrested for child porn" and see how many there are...and those are just the ones that have been arrested. Sadly, our country and really those around the world have been infiltrated by wicked people...every aspect of our life, education, politics, music and entertainment, business, and worst of all the church and I believe those in the church are the ones we will see fall first. We are about to witness something huge....and although it might be ugly to see when it's happening the end result will be absolutely awesome. It reminds me of lyrics my son made up in a video that can be found on YouTube by searching "Silver Wire Minoa". (It's 3:34 long posted in January). It's a fun song and a little comical....and honestly perhaps somewhat prophetic? I listened to his lyrics in other songs over and over again trying to understand what was going on his head! He went through a lot that I don't really know about...and at this point I don't really need to. He is healing and that's what matters...and healing is coming for all the rest of these kids and young adults as well!
What is steam? My kid had that icon on desktop
I don’t know exactly how it works but you can buy steam cards I think it’s like a store for online games. As a whole I’m of the opinion that the majority of if not all video games are bad😞. I wish I could have a do over!
Right- thanks Brenda. I agree with you. My intuition at the time said 'ooo- almost porn...' so many times with the stuff my child was getting into. I thought it was my generation, other parents said 'you'll have to let go a bit... it's just the way things are, but now I see many years later that I was right. And I'm no prude.
I turned down a job because the company held its communications on Discord. Too much color, too much animation, too much emoji.
Too much Smile.
Yes, and create a new, different email, social media profile/account for investigation. Screenshot for documentation as you see things that are not okay.
It is alarming that parents don't really know about social platforms and about language related to trans ideology. It's alarming because you can't object to things you don't know about. I wrote an article before where I talk about several online platforms but even I don't know them all https://www.pittparents.com/p/online-trans-ideology . I identified as trans as a teen I have since desisted I used to use a site called TrevorSpace which I don't think most people know. You may or may not have heard of the Trevor Project it is affiliated with them. It's public but the moderation is horrible and I think that when you have a site explicitly for suicial children you have a duty to moderate properly and protect them and I believe they have failed. I think its important to be aware and keep dialogue going, especially to encourage debate and teach not to fear others opinions. I think it can protect you from alienation and information control if you're able to spot it yourself, but I don't think its fool proof. There is a problem with discord as their chats are not really moderated. There is a report feature but nobody else will see your chat unless you report it, so kids on there are vulnerable to grooming. Groomers try to make you comfortable with them so that you don't see anything wrong with them when they abuse you. I know with trans groups specifically its often for people to refer to each other as their family, saying "If your parents don't support you I'm your mom/dad now" and saying they're safe people. I'm weary of it all since desisting if you were a "safe" person you wouldn't have to say that, and "safe" people aren't desperate for the trust of minors. You may or may not know of Schlep if you don't he was a predator catcher on Roblox who was banned from the platform and is now exposing Roblox covering for pedophiles and working on lawsuits. He said specifically that Roblox should cut all association with Discord. He says kids were abducted by people on discord by links they accessed through roblox. I say that because I generally trust what he has to say on online predators and its important to note that with discord its more than just trans ideology when it comes to abuse
You lost me at “without judgment.”
I say judge, judge often, and apply everything life has taught you in your judgment. Otherwise you remain in infancy.
“Trans” is sick. Start there. It needs to be treated away, not “affirmed.” A boy who thinks he wants his genitalia removed is a sick boy. Learn to see that sickness and drop all the “respect their choices” garbage.
Healthy people have no distinction between gender and sex, and sex is binary and immutable.
I understand your point, and I agree that discernment and judgment are part of maturity. We are called to recognize what is right and what is wrong, no question about that.
What I meant by saying “without judgment” isn’t that we shouldn’t judge at all. It’s that if our tone or approach makes someone feel judged personally, they shut down. And once they shut down, the bridge of communication is gone.
This is a very sensitive and confused generation. Many of them are lost, and the moment they feel attacked, they retreat into online spaces where the only voices they hear are the ones reinforcing their confusion. Then we lose the chance to speak truth into their lives.
So yes, we should absolutely hold firm convictions and let them know where we stand. But at the same time, we need to approach them in a way that keeps the door open, calm, loving, and steady, so they know they can come back and talk.
The original meaning of "discriminate" is also positive, like the word "judgment." The ability to accurately discriminate one thing from another is a measure of basic intelligence.
It's hard to understand how a parent or other caring adult could listen to a teenager talk about spending time in dangerous places without making judgments. One can avoid judging one's children's character of course, but judgments about a creepy Discord channel would probably be inevitable. And teenagers are often very vigilant about the nonverbal expressions of parental judgments. So, the question of when to say them out loud and in what words still requires practical answers.
Perhaps parents should go on these sites and pose as kids and lure these creeps out of the shadows and get the law after them. Just a thought.
But what if you don’t find groomers but simply other gender distressed kids?
I do wonder if that would stop them it may work on social media sites but I think it would be hard to do with discord specifically because it is just full of private chats with invite links you can find anywhere, it would be impossible to catch them all and even if you get in a private chat any particular chat can range very innocent to straight up criminal content. I used to use a site called TrevorSpace as a kid and now I have an account that I use just to screenshot what they're saying as evidence of abuse. People can call me whatever they want for that causes some people act like child abuse is fine but calling it out is "creepy". But its a little different cause the site is 13-24 for lgbtq+ people im 18 and gay there's no reason I can't be there, even if they don't like getting exposed
Thank you for this comment. Truthfully I knew nothing about Discord or TrevorSpace and just recently learned about them after Charlie Kirk was assassinated. Perhaps people should try to get those sites shut down. I do not know the answer I’m just overwhelmed because my son is trans and I feel helpless to get thru t him. I hate to see other kids teens and young adults get hurt by these monsters.
Big brother-esque censorship is NOT the answer.