My heart aches for this young person and these words help lift my spirits too that as parents, we are doing a good thing by delaying our daughter any medical transition and trying to help ground her in reality that biological sex does matter. I guess I can be a “glitter mom” too if this person needs help feeling confident in their biological sex.
You were trying to solve your problems, but you trusted the wrong people. It is understandable, they seem so certain and attack anyone who says they are wrong.
I pray that you can find something in person to devote yourself to. Animal rescue organizations, training a pet companion, babysitting for an overworked mom, teaching Sunday school to the littles (they would love your pretend and drama!)
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. You captured my heart. In the past few days I've shared with several people that, when I graduated and went off to college in 1964, I assumed everyone had been blessed to grow up in a community and church like I had. I began to slowly realize that wasn't true. Now I consider how many young people grow up today without ever having experienced real community. It leaves a "hole in the soul" that cannot be filled with other things. As I read your thoughts and what you had learned and what you are still struggling with, I had to wonder if you've ever been part of a loving community like I had. I think sharing your thoughts/experiences as you did so well in this article, is a step toward that. Keep searching for others you can learn to trust. Above all, trust God, who created you, will always love you, will never forsake you, always wants the best for you. I believe you have already taken an important step in that direction considering what Jesus told his disciples "And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." Pursue truth and reality. Satan is the Father of Lies and deceptions. This is a spiritual battle we all face.
You need a lawyer and a very good psychiatrist. Maybe you can find a decent one in a conservative area. Contact the lawyers who helped to shutdown the tavistock clinic in the UK.
Such a good piece--thank you for sharing. Your diagram was particularly insightful and I wish the second version was the basis for conversations online (or with therapists for God’s sake).
Oh, dear one, you touch my heart. My old, battered mom, grandma and great grandma heart. I miss my loved ones so much, those who have run down the rabbit hole and left me behind. You give me such hope. You have come through this tortuous journey and are on the other side. Trust will come to you. You are trustworthy. (It helps me to trust Jesus first. He helps me to find peace in whatever my circumstances.) From the title of your wonderful essay, you grabbed me, and then proceeded to totally capture me. "Actually, I was just crazy the whole time." How many hundreds, thousands, of times have I thought that about myself. And here I am, still here, for reasons the Lord knows. I know a few of the reasons you are here; you are a beloved child of God who has been given gifts to survive and to help others to survive. Thank you for being here, helping us all to understand what is at stake.
PS: learned 2 new words from your essay! Love, Indio
Michelle, you are such an incredible communicator. This is a brilliant piece that should be required reading for every health professional. You'll find your way back to trusting yourself because you have the courage, determination, tenacity to make it happen. You believe enough in yourself to know you'll get there. That's a pretty good sign. From an outside perspective (and maybe a fellow sufferer of apophenia,) you are immensely capable and so inspiring!
It takes a long time to mature as a human. Science knows this and still ignores it when facing a phase in development. It can recognize that a youngster is not the singer ‘Dark Elena’ (our daughter’s 8 month favorite). But, it can’t seem to come to grips with other gender based phases. Humans have a brain in which prediction has resulted from millions of years of development. It stops us from repeating behaviors that are similar to others that damage us. We look for patterns and we make up scenarios to perhaps explain why we aren’t content. After food, the sex drive is strongest and is hormonally driven and isn’t rational. Being surrounded by experts now who have to do something is a terrible trap. What we need is patience, listening and reassurance that things will be ok. We’re humans. How about a toasted cheese sandwich and tomato soup?
This essay is excellent! I wish everyone with any tie to transgender could read it. Your diagrams alone are such an astoundingly concise, accurate picture of the need for exploration rather than immediate affirmation that every teacher and health professional should see them. Thank you for your openness and commitment to share hard things. I’m so glad PITT posted this. I couldn’t comment on your site and it was tormenting me that I couldn’t tell you what a great job you did.
This is so beautifully written and powerful. Thanks so much for sharing your story.
Wonderful article.
My heart aches for this young person and these words help lift my spirits too that as parents, we are doing a good thing by delaying our daughter any medical transition and trying to help ground her in reality that biological sex does matter. I guess I can be a “glitter mom” too if this person needs help feeling confident in their biological sex.
So excellent! Thank you.
You were trying to solve your problems, but you trusted the wrong people. It is understandable, they seem so certain and attack anyone who says they are wrong.
I really like your revised graphic. that is powerful
I pray that you can find something in person to devote yourself to. Animal rescue organizations, training a pet companion, babysitting for an overworked mom, teaching Sunday school to the littles (they would love your pretend and drama!)
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. You captured my heart. In the past few days I've shared with several people that, when I graduated and went off to college in 1964, I assumed everyone had been blessed to grow up in a community and church like I had. I began to slowly realize that wasn't true. Now I consider how many young people grow up today without ever having experienced real community. It leaves a "hole in the soul" that cannot be filled with other things. As I read your thoughts and what you had learned and what you are still struggling with, I had to wonder if you've ever been part of a loving community like I had. I think sharing your thoughts/experiences as you did so well in this article, is a step toward that. Keep searching for others you can learn to trust. Above all, trust God, who created you, will always love you, will never forsake you, always wants the best for you. I believe you have already taken an important step in that direction considering what Jesus told his disciples "And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." Pursue truth and reality. Satan is the Father of Lies and deceptions. This is a spiritual battle we all face.
You need a lawyer and a very good psychiatrist. Maybe you can find a decent one in a conservative area. Contact the lawyers who helped to shutdown the tavistock clinic in the UK.
Such a good piece--thank you for sharing. Your diagram was particularly insightful and I wish the second version was the basis for conversations online (or with therapists for God’s sake).
Oh, dear one, you touch my heart. My old, battered mom, grandma and great grandma heart. I miss my loved ones so much, those who have run down the rabbit hole and left me behind. You give me such hope. You have come through this tortuous journey and are on the other side. Trust will come to you. You are trustworthy. (It helps me to trust Jesus first. He helps me to find peace in whatever my circumstances.) From the title of your wonderful essay, you grabbed me, and then proceeded to totally capture me. "Actually, I was just crazy the whole time." How many hundreds, thousands, of times have I thought that about myself. And here I am, still here, for reasons the Lord knows. I know a few of the reasons you are here; you are a beloved child of God who has been given gifts to survive and to help others to survive. Thank you for being here, helping us all to understand what is at stake.
PS: learned 2 new words from your essay! Love, Indio
So well written and insightful.
Thank you.
Please find a way to read this in Congress…while standing.
Michelle, you are such an incredible communicator. This is a brilliant piece that should be required reading for every health professional. You'll find your way back to trusting yourself because you have the courage, determination, tenacity to make it happen. You believe enough in yourself to know you'll get there. That's a pretty good sign. From an outside perspective (and maybe a fellow sufferer of apophenia,) you are immensely capable and so inspiring!
It takes a long time to mature as a human. Science knows this and still ignores it when facing a phase in development. It can recognize that a youngster is not the singer ‘Dark Elena’ (our daughter’s 8 month favorite). But, it can’t seem to come to grips with other gender based phases. Humans have a brain in which prediction has resulted from millions of years of development. It stops us from repeating behaviors that are similar to others that damage us. We look for patterns and we make up scenarios to perhaps explain why we aren’t content. After food, the sex drive is strongest and is hormonally driven and isn’t rational. Being surrounded by experts now who have to do something is a terrible trap. What we need is patience, listening and reassurance that things will be ok. We’re humans. How about a toasted cheese sandwich and tomato soup?
This essay is excellent! I wish everyone with any tie to transgender could read it. Your diagrams alone are such an astoundingly concise, accurate picture of the need for exploration rather than immediate affirmation that every teacher and health professional should see them. Thank you for your openness and commitment to share hard things. I’m so glad PITT posted this. I couldn’t comment on your site and it was tormenting me that I couldn’t tell you what a great job you did.