Hope and Confusion

My daughter was taken by the gender cult at age 13. She was never depressed or self-harmed before the male persona showed his face.

Over these years she has been medicated, hospitalized, self harmed and attempted suicide. Thankfully, we have had largely caring professionals in our corner. Many disclosed that they would not diagnose gender dysphoria and would not recommend referral to a gender clinic or pediatric endocrinologist.

Now at age 16 we see simultaneous fractures in the ideology and also strange steadfastness. She has had two significant relationships in the last few years. First, with another trans-identified female. They identified as a gay couple. Shortly after their break up the other girl desisted and is back to her natural female name and identity. To say I have been jealous is a gross understatement.

Very recently she has told me she is dating one of her long-time male friends. He has always identified as straight and I have always liked this boy. A good friend, good kid. She has also now told me that they are sexually active and just started using contraception. You have never seen a mother so happy to hear that her teen daughter is sexually active. Yet all her friends continue to use her male pronouns and name. Maybe I am being naive that there would be a realization that denial of biology is now impossible. I am terrified to ask the following questions.

Does your boyfriend identify as gay now?

Are you even open about your relationship at school?

Is your boyfriend strong enough to weather any potential teasing?

How would he feel if your relationship continued and you wanted to transition?

Would the removal of breasts be a hardship for either of you?

Would vaginal atrophy impact your pleasure?

What if you grow body hair?

What if you lose your hair?

What about a changing voice?