The parents of trans identified kids span the whole range of parents, the highly attentive and the distracted, those opposed to transitions and those who "listen" and facilitate them. There is no evidence that any particular parenting styles or skills are determinants of what the kid choses to do. What the kids do have in common are a peer group, teachers indoctrinating them in school, and exposure to adult influencers and exploiters.
Please stop blaming yourself, there is something completely diabolical going on in the schools, on social media, and amongst the kids themselves. The kids are being brainwashed, bullied, and peer pressured into changing their sex. They are also being brainwashed into turning away from their parents. Pray for your son, give it to God, and let your son know how much you love him.
It's so nice to hear from a dad. My heart goes out to you, questioning your choices over the years as a parent. We have all done the same. But the fact is, this is a viral phenomenon and possibly the only protection against it -- for those kids who are vulnerable -- is home-schooling in Siberia . . .
I understand how you feel. We never saw this madness coming from our daughter and now, for years we’ve been dealing with this the best we could; loving her as best we could and praying constantly for healing. We are flawed but our faith and love sustain us.
May God bless us and our children whom we love forever🙏❤️
My husband calls these mental meanderings the, coulda, shoulda, woulda's. It helps give us the illusion of control in the early days. The days before we realize how little control we actually have.
Please do not blame yourself! The death cult is strong, insidious & anti family relationships. You are just as much a victim of the trans cult as is your son. Talking to others that understand helps & a belief in truth & love does give comfort. We are all here with you & available to give support because we truly understand the pain & grief that you are experiencing!
Beautifully written and poignant. None of us could have seen it coming. It is nothing that you have done. When my son started identifying as trans (he has since desisted), I wished that we parented him in a way that you describe--gentle but consistent reminders and examples of how to "be a man," so to speak. I've done everything to avoid it when he was little, I never asked him to "man up", and my husband never asked him either. I wondered whether THAT was a mistake. I wondered whether we should have made more explicit efforts to raise a man, not just a "good human being." The point is that we just never know, and we will always try to blame ourselves. We raise them as we think is best for them, and sometimes despite our best efforts they still end up less resilient than we would have liked, more vulnerable, more susceptible to being brainwashed. Try not to blame yourself. It is not you. Your love for your son shines through this beautiful and sad piece of writing.
One thing I have learned is that this hits all kinds of families, religious, secular, left, right, single parent, two parent, same sex parents… I am the complete opposite of how you describe yourself and it didn’t matter. So give yourself a break and know that transgender ideology does not discriminate. It’s insidious and the people pushing it don’t care what kind of parents we are unless we blindly affirm and follow our kids into the cult.
Or deeply troubled and anxious about their sexuality (internalized homophobia), or struggling with a traumatic event involving sexual abuse or harassment, or a feeling of alienation, loneliness and not fitting in…all common challenges that adolescents may experience. When teachers and social media push “gender” as life affirming and quasi-magical, it’s like dangling a magic talisman or potion in front of them. Mental illness becomes the result, not the cause, of identifying as trans.
It’s definitely a dangerous ideology and a social contagion. One day, it’ll just be a regrettable and disastrous stain on the pages of social and medical history, just like the lobotomy.
Everyone is blindsided by this trans-cult. How could any of us really prepare for what was to come? No one wanted to think the unthinkable. How could anyone really believe the trans ideology? A boy cannot become a woman! A girl cannot become a man! By the time a child can say "I am trans" they have already been indoctrinated and brainwashed. It seems as though parents are the last ones to know, or the last one's who keep fighting for the truth. I hope your story will have a better ending.
The last line you wrote says it all. We’ve all made mistakes because that is just the nature of being human. Please don’t beat on yourself for this (although I suspect we all do at some point). I keep the serenity prayer going for myself (serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change what I can change; and wisdom to know the difference) and a prayer going for all the families affected by this that somehow everyone will find their way to health and peace in the end.
Oh, this hurts the heart. We all know you how feel - but we also all know that this evil touches every type of family. You can spend the rest of your life second-guessing what you did or how you parented. But you know there's always going to be a story here of a parent who did the opposite of what you did and he or she has the same outcome with their own child. We are Davids against Goliath. I'm firmly convinced of that.
Be good to yourself. You clearly love your son. All good parents engage in self-reflection and ask what they could have done better. But ruminating won't help you. Easier said than done to stop, but please try. You still have other family, maybe a wife, maybe other kids, friends who need you too. God bless.
My heart goes out to you and any parent dealing with this tragic loss in their families. I too beat myself up and question what I could have done differently. Now 4 years post “reveal” under my belt, my daughter (born female at birth) is softening and returning to a more feminine version of herself although her partner insists on using “they” pronoun.
Truly I’m not sure that any of us could have done anything to avoid this. My question now is what made my child (then teen) vulnerable to this suggestion? I don’t know if I’ll ever know the answer to that question until my daughter (now 26) is older and willing to talk about it.
In the meantime, I’m practicing giving myself grace for being an imperfect, “good enough parent” (my friends say “exemplary” parent). I hope you can give yourself grace to have parented your son all these years and for walking through this unimaginable loss/journey that none of us could have predicted.
My heart goes out to you and any parent dealing with this tragic loss in their families. I too beat myself up and question what I could have done differently. Now 4 years post “reveal” under my belt, my daughter (born female at birth) is softening and returning to a more feminine version of herself although her partner insists on using “they” pronoun.
Truly I’m not sure that any of us could have done anything to avoid this. My question now is what made my child (then teen) vulnerable to this suggestion? I don’t know if I’ll ever know the answer to that question until my daughter (now 26) is older and willing to talk about it.
In the meantime, I’m practicing giving myself grace for being an imperfect, “good enough parent” (my friends say “exemplary” parent). I pray for your strength and peace and hope you can give yourself grace to have parented your son all these years and for walking through this unimaginable loss/journey that none of us could have predicted.
Either one TRA discovered PITT and told his/her friends or it's just one person with multiple accounts. Kinda suspicious to see so many TRA comments under different names all at once when we usually don't see any.
I'm a trans supporter. I support them being protected from wrong hormones & sexual butchery. I support them remembering that they are perfect just the way they are. I support them detransitioning. And I support them suing the hell out of their maiming medi-cull providers.
You're our poor lost children. The vampires are the wicked ones in high places who've engineered this pandemic of gender dysphoria & it's life destroying "treatments". Their minions are the indoctrinated experts in powerful positions within academia, media & medicine who've propagated your affliction by lying. You can call us names, go no contact, and pretend we hate you, but we love you unconditionally & forgive you for the years of anguish & sleepless nights. Most of us will be here waiting to help you heal when your surgeries go awry or the wrong hormones have finally taken a toll on your vital organs. But your doctors and "loving community" of al lies will not.
The sleepless nights are long gone for me, so I was speaking for parents more recently faced with estrangement, who still
don't know where there children are or who they're with, but know they're struggling with untreated mental health/trauma. My son no longer wanders the streets alone at night & has settled down with his long term girlfriend. Out of respect, I won't go into details of his past, suffice to say some of the self destructive behaviors were espoused by those promoting gender ideology.
As far as the orchestration of mass gender dysphoria and the widespread acceptance of sterilization & other damaging medical practices. I've researched this for over a decade now, and as a "gen-xer" who associated with plenty of cross dressers & transexuals back in my day, it's much darker than I could have imagined.
I'm glad you're satisfied and successful in your life, but for every one of you there are 10 young folks who will be taken to hell & back, and who may not survive it. That's not "woe is me" but mothers & fathers watching their precious children destroyed while the world at large, influenced by the largest most powerful corporations in the world, cheers them on.
You probably wouldn’t know love if it smacked you in the face. These PITT parents love their children, and that’s why they won’t “agree” with their sickness, lies, and delusions. It is not loving to agree with someone when they are just tripping and delusional. And when they can ruin their life with the delusion. It’s the worst kind of enabling. You should probably go to another page, because this one’s obviously not for you. Fantasyland is just around the corner, though. You know: that magical place where girls can become boys and boys can become girls — Fantasyland.
The parents of trans identified kids span the whole range of parents, the highly attentive and the distracted, those opposed to transitions and those who "listen" and facilitate them. There is no evidence that any particular parenting styles or skills are determinants of what the kid choses to do. What the kids do have in common are a peer group, teachers indoctrinating them in school, and exposure to adult influencers and exploiters.
You did not create this cult.
You did not cause the Trans moral panic.
A tiny handful of multimillionaire and billionaire men did: https://www.the11thhourblog.com/
Please stop blaming yourself, there is something completely diabolical going on in the schools, on social media, and amongst the kids themselves. The kids are being brainwashed, bullied, and peer pressured into changing their sex. They are also being brainwashed into turning away from their parents. Pray for your son, give it to God, and let your son know how much you love him.
It's so nice to hear from a dad. My heart goes out to you, questioning your choices over the years as a parent. We have all done the same. But the fact is, this is a viral phenomenon and possibly the only protection against it -- for those kids who are vulnerable -- is home-schooling in Siberia . . .
I understand how you feel. We never saw this madness coming from our daughter and now, for years we’ve been dealing with this the best we could; loving her as best we could and praying constantly for healing. We are flawed but our faith and love sustain us.
May God bless us and our children whom we love forever🙏❤️
My husband calls these mental meanderings the, coulda, shoulda, woulda's. It helps give us the illusion of control in the early days. The days before we realize how little control we actually have.
I too never saw this coming for my daughter.
Please do not blame yourself! The death cult is strong, insidious & anti family relationships. You are just as much a victim of the trans cult as is your son. Talking to others that understand helps & a belief in truth & love does give comfort. We are all here with you & available to give support because we truly understand the pain & grief that you are experiencing!
Bless you & your son.
Beautifully written and poignant. None of us could have seen it coming. It is nothing that you have done. When my son started identifying as trans (he has since desisted), I wished that we parented him in a way that you describe--gentle but consistent reminders and examples of how to "be a man," so to speak. I've done everything to avoid it when he was little, I never asked him to "man up", and my husband never asked him either. I wondered whether THAT was a mistake. I wondered whether we should have made more explicit efforts to raise a man, not just a "good human being." The point is that we just never know, and we will always try to blame ourselves. We raise them as we think is best for them, and sometimes despite our best efforts they still end up less resilient than we would have liked, more vulnerable, more susceptible to being brainwashed. Try not to blame yourself. It is not you. Your love for your son shines through this beautiful and sad piece of writing.
beautifully written.
One thing I have learned is that this hits all kinds of families, religious, secular, left, right, single parent, two parent, same sex parents… I am the complete opposite of how you describe yourself and it didn’t matter. So give yourself a break and know that transgender ideology does not discriminate. It’s insidious and the people pushing it don’t care what kind of parents we are unless we blindly affirm and follow our kids into the cult.
No one is "trans". Maybe some people are just mentally ill.
Or deeply troubled and anxious about their sexuality (internalized homophobia), or struggling with a traumatic event involving sexual abuse or harassment, or a feeling of alienation, loneliness and not fitting in…all common challenges that adolescents may experience. When teachers and social media push “gender” as life affirming and quasi-magical, it’s like dangling a magic talisman or potion in front of them. Mental illness becomes the result, not the cause, of identifying as trans.
It’s definitely a dangerous ideology and a social contagion. One day, it’ll just be a regrettable and disastrous stain on the pages of social and medical history, just like the lobotomy.
I hope and pray that we get there sooner than later.
It’s not your fault. Plain and simple. Trans identifying kids are coming from all parenting styles.
Sexuality is not a child's to determine, it is a biological reality.
Everyone is blindsided by this trans-cult. How could any of us really prepare for what was to come? No one wanted to think the unthinkable. How could anyone really believe the trans ideology? A boy cannot become a woman! A girl cannot become a man! By the time a child can say "I am trans" they have already been indoctrinated and brainwashed. It seems as though parents are the last ones to know, or the last one's who keep fighting for the truth. I hope your story will have a better ending.
The last line you wrote says it all. We’ve all made mistakes because that is just the nature of being human. Please don’t beat on yourself for this (although I suspect we all do at some point). I keep the serenity prayer going for myself (serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change what I can change; and wisdom to know the difference) and a prayer going for all the families affected by this that somehow everyone will find their way to health and peace in the end.
Oh, this hurts the heart. We all know you how feel - but we also all know that this evil touches every type of family. You can spend the rest of your life second-guessing what you did or how you parented. But you know there's always going to be a story here of a parent who did the opposite of what you did and he or she has the same outcome with their own child. We are Davids against Goliath. I'm firmly convinced of that.
Be good to yourself. You clearly love your son. All good parents engage in self-reflection and ask what they could have done better. But ruminating won't help you. Easier said than done to stop, but please try. You still have other family, maybe a wife, maybe other kids, friends who need you too. God bless.
My heart goes out to you and any parent dealing with this tragic loss in their families. I too beat myself up and question what I could have done differently. Now 4 years post “reveal” under my belt, my daughter (born female at birth) is softening and returning to a more feminine version of herself although her partner insists on using “they” pronoun.
Truly I’m not sure that any of us could have done anything to avoid this. My question now is what made my child (then teen) vulnerable to this suggestion? I don’t know if I’ll ever know the answer to that question until my daughter (now 26) is older and willing to talk about it.
In the meantime, I’m practicing giving myself grace for being an imperfect, “good enough parent” (my friends say “exemplary” parent). I hope you can give yourself grace to have parented your son all these years and for walking through this unimaginable loss/journey that none of us could have predicted.
My heart goes out to you and any parent dealing with this tragic loss in their families. I too beat myself up and question what I could have done differently. Now 4 years post “reveal” under my belt, my daughter (born female at birth) is softening and returning to a more feminine version of herself although her partner insists on using “they” pronoun.
Truly I’m not sure that any of us could have done anything to avoid this. My question now is what made my child (then teen) vulnerable to this suggestion? I don’t know if I’ll ever know the answer to that question until my daughter (now 26) is older and willing to talk about it.
In the meantime, I’m practicing giving myself grace for being an imperfect, “good enough parent” (my friends say “exemplary” parent). I pray for your strength and peace and hope you can give yourself grace to have parented your son all these years and for walking through this unimaginable loss/journey that none of us could have predicted.
Looks like PITT is being inundated with trans supporters.
Either one TRA discovered PITT and told his/her friends or it's just one person with multiple accounts. Kinda suspicious to see so many TRA comments under different names all at once when we usually don't see any.
I'm a trans supporter. I support them being protected from wrong hormones & sexual butchery. I support them remembering that they are perfect just the way they are. I support them detransitioning. And I support them suing the hell out of their maiming medi-cull providers.
Yes. You know - the Be Kind people.
Yep, Luc. They will leave, though. Too much truth will make them go. Just watch.
Like a crucifix to Dracula.
You're our poor lost children. The vampires are the wicked ones in high places who've engineered this pandemic of gender dysphoria & it's life destroying "treatments". Their minions are the indoctrinated experts in powerful positions within academia, media & medicine who've propagated your affliction by lying. You can call us names, go no contact, and pretend we hate you, but we love you unconditionally & forgive you for the years of anguish & sleepless nights. Most of us will be here waiting to help you heal when your surgeries go awry or the wrong hormones have finally taken a toll on your vital organs. But your doctors and "loving community" of al lies will not.
The sleepless nights are long gone for me, so I was speaking for parents more recently faced with estrangement, who still
don't know where there children are or who they're with, but know they're struggling with untreated mental health/trauma. My son no longer wanders the streets alone at night & has settled down with his long term girlfriend. Out of respect, I won't go into details of his past, suffice to say some of the self destructive behaviors were espoused by those promoting gender ideology.
As far as the orchestration of mass gender dysphoria and the widespread acceptance of sterilization & other damaging medical practices. I've researched this for over a decade now, and as a "gen-xer" who associated with plenty of cross dressers & transexuals back in my day, it's much darker than I could have imagined.
I'm glad you're satisfied and successful in your life, but for every one of you there are 10 young folks who will be taken to hell & back, and who may not survive it. That's not "woe is me" but mothers & fathers watching their precious children destroyed while the world at large, influenced by the largest most powerful corporations in the world, cheers them on.
You probably wouldn’t know love if it smacked you in the face. These PITT parents love their children, and that’s why they won’t “agree” with their sickness, lies, and delusions. It is not loving to agree with someone when they are just tripping and delusional. And when they can ruin their life with the delusion. It’s the worst kind of enabling. You should probably go to another page, because this one’s obviously not for you. Fantasyland is just around the corner, though. You know: that magical place where girls can become boys and boys can become girls — Fantasyland.