So many of us women who are older — or just plain old, like me — were allowed to explore who we were and discover our strengths as kids. We were allowed to play and compete with boys, out-run them, play ball with them, and just be tough like them. No one ever suggested to us that we’d been born in the wrong body. It never occurred to me, and no one ever suggested to me that I was really a boy, just because I loved climbing trees, leaping over fences, or crawling under them, and going on adventures in the woods. I was proud to call myself a tomboy. It meant I had skills! Somewhere around middle school, I remember being glad I was a girl, though I knew I was still as athletic and strong as lots of boys. But I found I liked boys in a new way and ended up marrying my high school boyfriend. I’m thanking God I was not born during these times, because I’m pretty sure there would have been some “transitioning” encouraged for me. I find it both sad to think about and chilling, as I grasp the horror of what is being forced upon our kids. We must defeat this evil.
When I was three I didn't know anything about housework or childbirth. I didn't know that mom was a female and daddy was a male, or anything at all about their genitals. I sat down and got my hair cut without having any say in it. So did my brother. The same with clothes that were picked out by adults that I was expected to wear. I had to pick up toys, and eat my vegetables. So did my brother. There is just so much weird stuff and choices that children are taught at these weirdly young ages.
Knowing vs Wanting - very good point. There is a huge difference between the two and it is not always clear which one is more accurate. I was a tomboy but never wanted to be a boy. I was hyper, wild, and loved to climb trees, race boys, and catch worms or frogs or snakes. I wore a dress every day to school and hated that boys could wear trousers - my legs froze during the winter, and I always had to be careful not to let my dress fly up and show my underwear. I was in 7th grade in 1970 when the law was changed, and girls could wear pants to school. Finally, there was equality! I was thrilled and I think I did not wear a dress again to school until after I graduated high school! In the early 80's I got a job as a bank teller and started wearing dresses again. I was actually a girly-girl deep down inside and loved having matching shoes and purses, wearing skirts and dresses showing my feminine side, and wearing nail polish and jewelry. Had I been born much later in life, I might have been swayed to be trans. It frightens me to think about it. It is cruel to influence the minds of innocent children into thinking they are something they are not. Born in the wrong body, having the wrong brain. The tide is changing, and the truth is being told. Detransitioners are helping to spread the word by their own first-hand experiences and there is no denying what they have gone through. Tricked, manipulated, and lied to by a world that is full of greed and evil. It is accountability time! HOPE is here.
I appreciate that you make the distinction between wanting to be the opposite sex and believing you really are the opposite sex. Many years back I learned about trans people in a psychology class, or I should say ABNORMAL psychology class. It was a well-known phenomenon, but also very rare, and not something anyone would see as desirable or cause for celebration -- no rainbows and unicorns or glitter families.
The fact that a mental health disorder has been turned into a cult is very disturbing, indeed. But it's also important to recognize that while no one is actually born in the "wrong body," there always have been and always will be a few people who believe this to be true, and it's usually from a very early age. These are people deserving of our compassion.
I am glad you survived childhood/ young adulthood intact. Today the model for medicalization has broadened. Young, old, male, female, gender conforming or not - they do not care. They just want bodies.
"Gender dysphoria" are 2 words used today to incite a revolution in modern medicine. The body can be anything. Natural law is out for a medical model of man. The goal is transhumanism.
As I've noticed in commented many times before, I just don't understand how a girl can say she "feels like she wants to be a boy", or a boy says they " feel like they want to be a girl'. How the heck can you "feel" like something you've never been before, or done before?
Thanks for sharing your story. It's was refreshing to hear.
I think that the definition of "gender" is the expression of masculine and feminine - that's why there can be 100's of "gender"s. Every word that describes "male or female" or "masculine or feminine" can be considered a "gender". Some are fixed, like the reproductive systems of male and female, or words like mother and father. When I was a child boys wore pants and girls wore skirts and he/she him/her. Others are historical, i.e. men are strong, women are weak, etc. Years ago the male and female roles were very rigid, i.e. men did not wear pink. I like to think that there are no longer rigid male/female rolls, but am aware that lots of people and lots of countries still have very rigid "rules".
Gender and sex are not same.
'trans" has changed the meaning of many words and made up new words. We all need to be very precise in the language that we use and take back what "trans" has taken away.
I was horrified when Trump said there were 2 "gender" male and female - he should have said 2 sexes. And happy when his press person says whenever she refers to sexes that there are only 2 - male and female. I am glad that his press person says 2 sexes.
It's scary for all of us who were "different" as children to think that we would, in today's world, be a changed to a different sex.
Not only did I want to be a boy, I had the very strong feeling that this was a mistake, that I should have been born a boy. But it was a different decade, and nobody entertained the thought. (Thankfully! Or who knows what I might have done!)
Childhood of wearing boys clothes and playing Indians and Cowboys, romping around with the boys of the neighborhood - and then simply outgrew it by age 17 or so. I will never be a girly girl, but I am definitely a woman and have no issue with that.
This is why it kills me so that my own child fell into the trans trap. She was in fact much more feminine as a kid than I ever was (she played with dolls and other girls), but somehow she is convinced she is a guy. Going on 8 years now… I’m still hoping she’ll come out of it at some point.
I'm not sure what I would have done if I was allowed to go into the girl's locker room if I wore a dress. Probably nothing different. Probably. But hormones were strong then :)
Same here - if I grew up in this lunatic age, some fool would probably have concluded I was a boy and tried to “affirm” that I was in the wrong body. We have turned gender non-conforming into a pathology rather than an individual choice of pursuing one’s life without regard to societal stereotypes.
It is also true that kids were allowed to go have adventures, climb trees, invent games and be away from parents. This gives children a strong sense of self and self reliance. You got to know yourself. Part of this epidemic is that kids don’t understand who they are at their core.
I agree. I'm a desister, having been trans-identified as a teen before and during the COVID lockdowns. One of the few constructive things I actually wanted to do was to wander and be alone in the woods, because it was the only time I felt a semblance of peace. Unfortunately, I didn't spend much time out, due to concerns of me getting lost or somehow getting bitten by the most venomous snake in existence. But I think if I had, I would've gotten over my ROGD way faster (or would've never had it in the first place!).
Raising kids behind screens is just as harmful as raising wild animals in cages.
I asked my daughter if gender nonconforming people were trans. She said yes. I am sure she would say yes if I asked about androgynous people. What lies our world tells to feed their agenda!
They’ve been targeted by activist teachers and even by their own “progressive” parents seeking status and attention for themselves.
The strategy is to transition those kids ASAP so they don’t grow up to be lesbians, which would usually be the outcome if we just left those tomboys alone.
Lesbians or just strong women like Hilary Clinton, Liz Cheney, and JK Rowling. Love 'em or hate 'em, they scare the daylights out of the men-are-strong-and-aggressive/women-are-kind-and-submissive crowd. Born decades later, Hilary would no doubt have been transitioned to her "true masculine" self. Rowling? Well, she no doubt would have colorfully told them what to do with themselves.
Apples and oranges. There's no doubt that many tomboys grow up to be strong, heterosexual women. Absolutely. One who comes to mind is Stella O'Malley, the founder of Genspect. She was positive she was a boy who would grow up to be a man. Then puberty intervened, and today she's a contented wife and mother.
Another example was my own mother, who had three older brothers as role models. She was playing high school girls' basketball in the 1930's! Even after she married my father, her favorite attire was jeans, a tee-shirt and a pair of sneakers. Was she a strong woman? Hell yes, she was. And she made me one too.
Nevertheless, the fact remains that prior to trans ideology overriding every other option, what we today euphemistically call "gender dysphoria" or "gender nonconformity" were constants in the childhoods of many future lesbians and gay men. Lesbians and gay men of previous generations have told us that their childhoods were filled with self-loathing and family conflicts because they were shamed and pressured to conform to gender norms that they couldn't relate to.
I came out as a lesbian over 50 years ago and knew many such women and men. I lived for 10 years with a woman who was convinced she was going to grow up to be a man. Her religious, conservative mother made her life a living hell as she was forced to curl her hair, take ballroom dancing lessons and wear dresses that she detested. Reality hit the road when she got her period, and approximately ten seconds later she was falling in love with her best friend, and so it went...
TLDR: Gender nonconformity is normal for many -- but not all -- future lesbians and gay men. As Jamie Reed of the LGB Courage Coalition repeats on a daily basis: STOP TRANSING GAY KIDS. What she means is, leave the kids -- all of them -- alone. Whether they turn out to be gay or straight, the job of adults should be to protect their minds and bodies so they have the freedom to grow up and discover who they are and who they love without interference from the ghouls in schools and the medical clinics now running the show.
I get what you're saying, and I agree this movement is a threat to children who will grow up to be gay or lesbian--no argument. But my son, who has been injecting himself with estradiol and living as a woman for years, has never dated a man nor shown any romantic or sexual interest in a man, ever; he's 28. He's only interested in women. He's also gentle, nurturing, and cooperative--he was simply a straight kid who didn't fit the stereotypes. They, too, are in danger.
Yes, they are in danger. Feminine men have always been targets of humiliation and violence, especially from other men, although women can get in on the shaming too.
Your son sounds like a variation on the autogynephilic type of trans-identified male. The attraction to women is the key, but usually those men are more masculine than how you describe your son.
I've read a bit of the early literature. Blanchard was writing at a very different time; I believe there are more than two "types," at least now, the other(s) consisting of those simply sucked in by inculcation. Not to waste your time with my personal drama, but I feel my son's acute empathy and internalized misandry--not to mention depression and genius IQ/"overexcitabilities"--left him vulnerable to gender ideology's message of "you're not the way you should be, but we can fix that," without his being gay or classically AGP. The support for there being a new "type" would be the explosion in the numbers of those identifying as trans. Regardless, my son's body has been destroyed, with worse destruction in the works, in pursuit of an impossible dream. Thank you for your essay and your comments. There are so many children to be saved. Keep up the good fight.
I'm one of the lucky ones too! Grew up with 4 brothers and promptly trained my parents to NOT give me dolls for Christmas. What good would a doll do when all I needed was a pistol to play Cowboys and Indians! Climbing trees was my special expertise! I shudder to think what would have been of my life if I'd grown up in these times. It's absolutely sinister what's happening with the kids these days on all levels, not just this one.
They are fully indoctrinated in school, on the internet, tv programs, movies, shows, and the biggest one is they're told that adults don't know anything, hence their reluctance to even bother to listen to us.
So many of us women who are older — or just plain old, like me — were allowed to explore who we were and discover our strengths as kids. We were allowed to play and compete with boys, out-run them, play ball with them, and just be tough like them. No one ever suggested to us that we’d been born in the wrong body. It never occurred to me, and no one ever suggested to me that I was really a boy, just because I loved climbing trees, leaping over fences, or crawling under them, and going on adventures in the woods. I was proud to call myself a tomboy. It meant I had skills! Somewhere around middle school, I remember being glad I was a girl, though I knew I was still as athletic and strong as lots of boys. But I found I liked boys in a new way and ended up marrying my high school boyfriend. I’m thanking God I was not born during these times, because I’m pretty sure there would have been some “transitioning” encouraged for me. I find it both sad to think about and chilling, as I grasp the horror of what is being forced upon our kids. We must defeat this evil.
When I was three I didn't know anything about housework or childbirth. I didn't know that mom was a female and daddy was a male, or anything at all about their genitals. I sat down and got my hair cut without having any say in it. So did my brother. The same with clothes that were picked out by adults that I was expected to wear. I had to pick up toys, and eat my vegetables. So did my brother. There is just so much weird stuff and choices that children are taught at these weirdly young ages.
Knowing vs Wanting - very good point. There is a huge difference between the two and it is not always clear which one is more accurate. I was a tomboy but never wanted to be a boy. I was hyper, wild, and loved to climb trees, race boys, and catch worms or frogs or snakes. I wore a dress every day to school and hated that boys could wear trousers - my legs froze during the winter, and I always had to be careful not to let my dress fly up and show my underwear. I was in 7th grade in 1970 when the law was changed, and girls could wear pants to school. Finally, there was equality! I was thrilled and I think I did not wear a dress again to school until after I graduated high school! In the early 80's I got a job as a bank teller and started wearing dresses again. I was actually a girly-girl deep down inside and loved having matching shoes and purses, wearing skirts and dresses showing my feminine side, and wearing nail polish and jewelry. Had I been born much later in life, I might have been swayed to be trans. It frightens me to think about it. It is cruel to influence the minds of innocent children into thinking they are something they are not. Born in the wrong body, having the wrong brain. The tide is changing, and the truth is being told. Detransitioners are helping to spread the word by their own first-hand experiences and there is no denying what they have gone through. Tricked, manipulated, and lied to by a world that is full of greed and evil. It is accountability time! HOPE is here.
I appreciate that you make the distinction between wanting to be the opposite sex and believing you really are the opposite sex. Many years back I learned about trans people in a psychology class, or I should say ABNORMAL psychology class. It was a well-known phenomenon, but also very rare, and not something anyone would see as desirable or cause for celebration -- no rainbows and unicorns or glitter families.
The fact that a mental health disorder has been turned into a cult is very disturbing, indeed. But it's also important to recognize that while no one is actually born in the "wrong body," there always have been and always will be a few people who believe this to be true, and it's usually from a very early age. These are people deserving of our compassion.
I’m with you! Thank God this trans thing was not an option when I was growing up. I know I would have gotten sucked into it as well.
I am glad you survived childhood/ young adulthood intact. Today the model for medicalization has broadened. Young, old, male, female, gender conforming or not - they do not care. They just want bodies.
"Gender dysphoria" are 2 words used today to incite a revolution in modern medicine. The body can be anything. Natural law is out for a medical model of man. The goal is transhumanism.
As I've noticed in commented many times before, I just don't understand how a girl can say she "feels like she wants to be a boy", or a boy says they " feel like they want to be a girl'. How the heck can you "feel" like something you've never been before, or done before?
Because you can imagine what it would be like. You see people of the opposite sex every single day, so you know how they look and behave.
They all do not behave the same though.
Imaging and being is not the same. Then they decide to cut off their body parts.
That's like me saying "I feel like I don't really need my little toe, so I will just cut it off".
Thanks for sharing your story. It's was refreshing to hear.
I think that the definition of "gender" is the expression of masculine and feminine - that's why there can be 100's of "gender"s. Every word that describes "male or female" or "masculine or feminine" can be considered a "gender". Some are fixed, like the reproductive systems of male and female, or words like mother and father. When I was a child boys wore pants and girls wore skirts and he/she him/her. Others are historical, i.e. men are strong, women are weak, etc. Years ago the male and female roles were very rigid, i.e. men did not wear pink. I like to think that there are no longer rigid male/female rolls, but am aware that lots of people and lots of countries still have very rigid "rules".
Gender and sex are not same.
'trans" has changed the meaning of many words and made up new words. We all need to be very precise in the language that we use and take back what "trans" has taken away.
I was horrified when Trump said there were 2 "gender" male and female - he should have said 2 sexes. And happy when his press person says whenever she refers to sexes that there are only 2 - male and female. I am glad that his press person says 2 sexes.
It's scary for all of us who were "different" as children to think that we would, in today's world, be a changed to a different sex.
Yes, that was me as well!
Not only did I want to be a boy, I had the very strong feeling that this was a mistake, that I should have been born a boy. But it was a different decade, and nobody entertained the thought. (Thankfully! Or who knows what I might have done!)
Childhood of wearing boys clothes and playing Indians and Cowboys, romping around with the boys of the neighborhood - and then simply outgrew it by age 17 or so. I will never be a girly girl, but I am definitely a woman and have no issue with that.
This is why it kills me so that my own child fell into the trans trap. She was in fact much more feminine as a kid than I ever was (she played with dolls and other girls), but somehow she is convinced she is a guy. Going on 8 years now… I’m still hoping she’ll come out of it at some point.
I'm not sure what I would have done if I was allowed to go into the girl's locker room if I wore a dress. Probably nothing different. Probably. But hormones were strong then :)
Same here - if I grew up in this lunatic age, some fool would probably have concluded I was a boy and tried to “affirm” that I was in the wrong body. We have turned gender non-conforming into a pathology rather than an individual choice of pursuing one’s life without regard to societal stereotypes.
It is also true that kids were allowed to go have adventures, climb trees, invent games and be away from parents. This gives children a strong sense of self and self reliance. You got to know yourself. Part of this epidemic is that kids don’t understand who they are at their core.
I agree. I'm a desister, having been trans-identified as a teen before and during the COVID lockdowns. One of the few constructive things I actually wanted to do was to wander and be alone in the woods, because it was the only time I felt a semblance of peace. Unfortunately, I didn't spend much time out, due to concerns of me getting lost or somehow getting bitten by the most venomous snake in existence. But I think if I had, I would've gotten over my ROGD way faster (or would've never had it in the first place!).
Raising kids behind screens is just as harmful as raising wild animals in cages.
Well said. I hope you’re finding your way and spending lots of time outside.
I asked my daughter if gender nonconforming people were trans. She said yes. I am sure she would say yes if I asked about androgynous people. What lies our world tells to feed their agenda!
Love this. Where have all the tomboys gone?
They’ve been targeted by activist teachers and even by their own “progressive” parents seeking status and attention for themselves.
The strategy is to transition those kids ASAP so they don’t grow up to be lesbians, which would usually be the outcome if we just left those tomboys alone.
Lesbians or just strong women like Hilary Clinton, Liz Cheney, and JK Rowling. Love 'em or hate 'em, they scare the daylights out of the men-are-strong-and-aggressive/women-are-kind-and-submissive crowd. Born decades later, Hilary would no doubt have been transitioned to her "true masculine" self. Rowling? Well, she no doubt would have colorfully told them what to do with themselves.
Apples and oranges. There's no doubt that many tomboys grow up to be strong, heterosexual women. Absolutely. One who comes to mind is Stella O'Malley, the founder of Genspect. She was positive she was a boy who would grow up to be a man. Then puberty intervened, and today she's a contented wife and mother.
Another example was my own mother, who had three older brothers as role models. She was playing high school girls' basketball in the 1930's! Even after she married my father, her favorite attire was jeans, a tee-shirt and a pair of sneakers. Was she a strong woman? Hell yes, she was. And she made me one too.
Nevertheless, the fact remains that prior to trans ideology overriding every other option, what we today euphemistically call "gender dysphoria" or "gender nonconformity" were constants in the childhoods of many future lesbians and gay men. Lesbians and gay men of previous generations have told us that their childhoods were filled with self-loathing and family conflicts because they were shamed and pressured to conform to gender norms that they couldn't relate to.
I came out as a lesbian over 50 years ago and knew many such women and men. I lived for 10 years with a woman who was convinced she was going to grow up to be a man. Her religious, conservative mother made her life a living hell as she was forced to curl her hair, take ballroom dancing lessons and wear dresses that she detested. Reality hit the road when she got her period, and approximately ten seconds later she was falling in love with her best friend, and so it went...
TLDR: Gender nonconformity is normal for many -- but not all -- future lesbians and gay men. As Jamie Reed of the LGB Courage Coalition repeats on a daily basis: STOP TRANSING GAY KIDS. What she means is, leave the kids -- all of them -- alone. Whether they turn out to be gay or straight, the job of adults should be to protect their minds and bodies so they have the freedom to grow up and discover who they are and who they love without interference from the ghouls in schools and the medical clinics now running the show.
I get what you're saying, and I agree this movement is a threat to children who will grow up to be gay or lesbian--no argument. But my son, who has been injecting himself with estradiol and living as a woman for years, has never dated a man nor shown any romantic or sexual interest in a man, ever; he's 28. He's only interested in women. He's also gentle, nurturing, and cooperative--he was simply a straight kid who didn't fit the stereotypes. They, too, are in danger.
Yes, they are in danger. Feminine men have always been targets of humiliation and violence, especially from other men, although women can get in on the shaming too.
Your son sounds like a variation on the autogynephilic type of trans-identified male. The attraction to women is the key, but usually those men are more masculine than how you describe your son.
I've read a bit of the early literature. Blanchard was writing at a very different time; I believe there are more than two "types," at least now, the other(s) consisting of those simply sucked in by inculcation. Not to waste your time with my personal drama, but I feel my son's acute empathy and internalized misandry--not to mention depression and genius IQ/"overexcitabilities"--left him vulnerable to gender ideology's message of "you're not the way you should be, but we can fix that," without his being gay or classically AGP. The support for there being a new "type" would be the explosion in the numbers of those identifying as trans. Regardless, my son's body has been destroyed, with worse destruction in the works, in pursuit of an impossible dream. Thank you for your essay and your comments. There are so many children to be saved. Keep up the good fight.
I'm one of the lucky ones too! Grew up with 4 brothers and promptly trained my parents to NOT give me dolls for Christmas. What good would a doll do when all I needed was a pistol to play Cowboys and Indians! Climbing trees was my special expertise! I shudder to think what would have been of my life if I'd grown up in these times. It's absolutely sinister what's happening with the kids these days on all levels, not just this one.
Sometimes I think we old tomboys should create a podcast to show the girls of today that gender nonconformity always existed and that it’s okay.
But I can’t even get through to my own kid.
They are fully indoctrinated in school, on the internet, tv programs, movies, shows, and the biggest one is they're told that adults don't know anything, hence their reluctance to even bother to listen to us.
You are a lucky one.