Love Let’s Her Children Go
I am the mother of an ROGD adult with severe mental health problems and trauma. She was rushed into medicalisation by her therapists and has now been on testosterone for three years and has had a double mastectomy. Our once close relationship is strained, and she has threatened to end contact with me unless I affirm her as a man and use the 'correct' pronouns. This feels wrong to me. It feels like a lie.
As parents of adult children, all we can do is watch in anguish as they make terrible mistakes; and keep loving them even when they reject us.
The following is a song about the agony of loving your child and letting them go. I hope that sharing it might help other PITT parents, especially of adult and estranged children.
From a struggling South African mom
My 30 YO daughter is in the same boat, I cannot believe how badly she wants us to call her a he and use a different name, I mean it's an evil, she can fool some people for a while, but we are her parents, even if I agreed I would still slip up all the time, plus, it's a bald faced lie. We won't lie, we try to not use any pronoun or name, but we slip up sometimes. It's ridiculous, forcing parents to lie, well we won't kiddo.
"Our once close relationship is strained, and she has threatened to end contact with me unless I affirm her as a man and use the 'correct' pronouns. This feels wrong to me. It feels like a lie." Me too. Thank you for sharing. I must stay tethered to the truth and let her go too. Perhaps our girls will come back and perhaps they won't. It is no longer up to me.