My Truth

It is very common in the parlance of the day to hear a person refer to “their truth” based on their lived experience. My truth is often heard as the requisite context to explain anything from offense at perceived micro aggressions to explanations for all out riots in the streets.  Someone perceives that they or their identity group are slighted in some manner.  Upon examination it may be revealed that objectively the perceived slight could be explained in less intense or incriminating ways. But that is never the way the problem is put to rest. What matters is that the perception of the victimized person gets the last word due their lived experience as a member of an identity group. We must consider an individual person’s truth from their perspective,  not the cold hard truth, the objective truth, the unbiased telling of events in accurate detail. It is the notion of each person’s truth that must be accepted on face value.  This notion certainly is an underlying foundation of transgender ideology. 

Well, here is my truth. One of many lived experiences over my lifetime.  I gave birth to a baby boy over two decades ago.  I knew he was a baby boy at several weeks’ gestation.  Yep, no doubt about it.  I was in fact having a boy.  This is an objective fact. 

And it’s also my truth. It is THE truth in this regard.  My third child is a male.  Although now he says otherwise.  He thinks of his trans-identity as his truth.  But which truth is the one that rules?  I would argue that my truth is every bit as valid as anyone else’s. There are almost 8 billion individuals in our world.  Each with their own lived experiences that color and mold their world view.  And therefore, a unique truth from each person’s perspective.  In the case of what sex my child happens to be, I have objective truth on my side as well.  But sadly, it doesn’t matter. In the new world gender and group identities are front and center.   

One salient aspect of the transgender belief system is a need to convince others that you are now indeed the opposite sex.  Transgenderism requires others to deny their reality.  It insists on an interactive delusion.  It is a head game that requires the subjugation of intellectual honesty to feelings.  This cannot be accomplished without great cost to others and society in general. Denying your own perceptions of reality is a soul crushing experience.  One cannot be expected to give into a thought process and delusion that is obviously false without losing grip on integrity.  Transgender doctrine forces everyone to play a game, whether they want to or not, according to rules decided on unilaterally.

You may say sex is one thing but gender is a different concept.  Sex is your biology, that which nature forced upon you without your permission.  Gender is how you feel inside.  I have heard explanations of the difference between gender and sex ad nauseum.  Well, what if gender is a frivolous idea to me?  The idea that there is an authentic you separate from your physical self is akin to a spiritual concept.  It is in the purview of religious beliefs. Ironically, many of those advocating for the creed of gender would bristle at the thought of any religiosity in their lives.  I think what is now called “gender” is really the intersection of personality and culture.  Personality and culture have both been around a long time.  And throughout history, when not exerting energy just to survive, humans have contemplated to some extent their personal fit in their tribe or culture.  Some of that pondering is informed by how you perceive your self-expression vis a vis your sex.  These facts of the ages, these self-evident truths that our ancestors took in stride, are now called gender.  

If your gender perception does not perfectly align with culture, then your truth is that you were born in the wrong body.  Probably it is easier on some level to think that.  You can blame a mistake of fate and therefore avoid the hard work necessary to really know yourself.  You can attempt to avoid the frustrating and often heartbreaking aspects of life that punch you in the face and let you know that it is hard to grow up and navigate life. People often want an escape hatch.  Transgender ideology is the current, trendy escape hatch for young people opting out of themselves.

So back to my truth.  My son says he wants to live his life as a “woman”.  His ability to comfortably integrate his male body with his personality and cultural expectations has him searching for his authentic self in the perception of others.  His Aspie traits make fitting his nature into what he thinks a man must be a daunting challenge.  Society now is giving him a work around that challenge. He states that his truth is that he would be happier as a woman.  He cannot accept who he really is but wants me to accept who he wishes to be.  My lived experience, as his mom, is that he has always struggled with his inner self.  That struggle isn’t going anywhere, no matter how many others agree to play along.  I love him dearly and hope he someday figures out how to feel comfortable in his own skin.  Only that will lead to true contentment.  That is my hope for him.  And it is my truth, which is on a par with everyone’s truth.