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Ohiomom's avatar

well, individuation is a clearly well defined stage of development. You are correct the transcult has used this well defined part of childhood against parents. One cannot ignore the developmental stage however, because trying to control them is always a bad idea during that phase, so hard to watch.

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GenderRealistMom's avatar

We shouldn't be controlling our young adult children but we still should be guiding them as much as possible. You know your child best. It's quite possible that college is the right choice, for some of them it is. If possible, please don't let your child share a dorm room with another trans-identified person or opposite sex person. You are paying for dorms, you can set some rules without being a controlling jerk. If your child is on an athletic team, can he/she room with a teammate? Frame it as something convenient, like this way you always remember to be on time for training or something. On a different note, I read somewhere here that one mom just bribed her kid , putting some money aside for her for every year she didn't start medicalizing. So, this way she wasn't controlling (Taking something away) but was offering an incentive.

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Ohiomom's avatar

yeh, I have placed a priority on schools that will room my kid with a teammate. I am also totally for bribing, we are pretty generous with our kids, so I do plan on saying the extras come with some strings. My hope is the peer pressure against medicalization will override any voices of support. I feel the energy draining out of the medicalization. I also plan on calling any medical facility offering treatment and remind them I will be calling a lawyer if my kid has any adverse outcomes. My experience is that it dampers peoples enthusiasm to treat my family when I do that. I had to do that for aging parents in the past, when doctors were handing out dangerous/addictive meds to an old man because he wanted them. Our dad was taking his ambien during the day and driving around, asleep at the wheel, but the doctor was giving him 3 pills a day. I called the doctor and threatened they would be responsible for what happened. The next call I got was " for some reason my doctor wont give me anymore ambien", " really?" Giving the rapidly increasing number of lawsuits, I feel a similar conversation coming.

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AlexEsq's avatar

wishing all good luck with navigating this! Maybe you'll be lucky and your child will value natural health over the hyperbole of those pushing drugs & surgery. ...

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Ohiomom's avatar

I will continue to pray for that for sure.

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Delightful Oddling's avatar

I am thinking of you and your child. I'm sorry for what you're going through. You and your child both deserve better and this never should have touched your lives.

As an aside, I think GETA changed their name to Therapy First https://www.therapyfirst.org/

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Ohiomom's avatar

thank you for the support, I did finally find it. Trouble is as soon as you google one of the therapists on the list the first google result is transactivists sites bashing them. :( I am so annoyed, how are we suppose to get our kids to open up and participate when they are told on google that the therapist is on the wrong team?

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