My beautiful daughter was 26 years old when she told me she was trans. This was September of 2022. Given she was the ultimate Pink Princess, before and after puberty, NEVER showing a desire to do anything masculine, I couldn’t comprehend this at all.
"You can never find rational peace whilst watching your child slowly destroy themself" this is so true and utterly terrifying. You wrote a beautiful essay. Thank you for the uplifting advice. When we let go of fear, resentment, anger, and hatred it is so freeing. Continue on your new journey! I hope your daughter returns to you one day and that a deep healing will happen for both of you. A mother's love - like none other. My daughter was never caught up in the trans-cult (thank the good Lord) but she was an addict to alcohol and some street drugs by the time she was in her mid-twenties. I spent many sleepless nights worrying, scared, and terrified that she would end up dead in an alley. She hit rock bottom and went to rehab and is now 5-years clean and sober, and the painful past is now a mere faded memory. It took me a long time to trust her again, and to believe that she was not ever going to go back to that lifestyle. Through these PITT essays, most parents long for their child to return but fear what physical condition and in what state of mind their child will be like if this were to happen. Even parents who child desisted are still full of fear that they might say or do something that will make their child turn around and go right back into the rabbit hole. This trans-cult is beyond evil and is all consuming. But there is hope as my nephew desisted and is doing remarkably well, and we are relieved that he has put this trans ideology nonsense behind him. Just like my daughter's recovery, every child that has been influenced, groomed and brainwashed can be healed. Keep the positive energy flowing and remember to take care of YOU first! Best wishes to you!
Thank you for sharing your story. I love the sincerity of your writing. We Christians call this a "testimony," but I understand your reluctance to jump into a religious category. Keep seeking God with a sincere heart. He is faithful and will not disappoint you.
I undertook a cacao ceremony ( which I was very sceptical of at first). The group leader had previously asked us to think about anxieties we would like to rid ourselves of. Mine was acute anxiety about my daughter who although now well has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts. An unanswered phone call or a date with a new man would send me into fear.
During the ceremony we were asked to think about generational trauma and particularly our maternal ancestors. What came to me was my paternal grandmother who died when I was 4. Many years later a relative told me she had desperately feared having another child as she had seen the child, a girl would die. This was in the early 20 th century and the child did die of a bronchial condition at 2 years old.
In that moment I saw my fear was partly inter generational trauma and recognised that I have always feared my daughter would die. It sounds terrible but from that moment my fear left me, I still worry sometimes but that irrational fear has gone. It was quite a revelation.
Astonishing. I wonder if I can find the energy to try your method to gain peace. I am a Christian, and I know I love God, but I have so many worries and don't know how to find His peace. Hoping your recommedations work for me. May your daughter desist soon without permanent damage to her psyche, may her body be healed by good surgery, may her mind and heart be healed from the harm that overwhelmed her. I believe she was literally attacked, spiritually, and not strong enough to understand or resist. I feel the deepest sympathy for parents and siblings of Trans people, I feel sympathy for the Trans people, but often I query why they themselves are unable to feel sympathy for their parents and other family members, why are they so eager to rush into procedures that contradict Nature, why are they so disobedient about listening to the judgement of others who have more experience of life and want to help them accept themselves.
They are a mystery, and I feel such pity for those that do wake up after they have done the most radical surgery etc. and realise how much they have harmed themselves and all for nothing. They still don't like themselves. Surely, it is a great battle between good and evil going on around us. Like you, the best we can do is protect our beloved children from permanent harm by PRAYER, and more prayer. Find the prayer that works for oneself. And do one's own Little Bit by writing to politicians and medical people and school boards etc. too.
Thankyou so much, this was so beautiful and heart felt and practical as well. I cherish your wisdom, your care and love for your daughter and your ability to continue the good fight, for yourself and for us all.
“I think I will now try and find something that will reach through the evil that is surrounding my daughter. There has to be something there that can open her mind. If I have success, I will be sure to let you know.”
I love your post. It’s honestly one of the most helpful posts I have read. I am in a similar situation with my adult son. The greatest influence you can have on your daughter is to pray for her. God alone can crush the evil that is surrounding your daughter and open her mind to the truth. God also works through us. I’m praying for you and your daughter today...🩵
Thank you for this. I was raised in a Christian home, but I was only a surface believer. It has taken going through this trauma with my 18 year old son for me to truly seek God. I have found peace in the midst of this storm. It wanes from time to time with each new blow (finding out that he started hrt in November without me knowing because he is an "adult" now being the latest blow), but it returns each time I hand it over to God. I have been struggling with other relationships and the simple way that you put it (choosing what is lovely) has unlocked something in my mind. Thank you again for sharing this. I pray this nightmare ends for all families this year!
Did you know there's a prayer called the "I don't know" prayer? It's very spiritual. You just go off somewhere quiet and hidden and you walk right up to the heart of God and you say, "I don't know."
I don't know where to go from here. I don't know what is happening. I don't know how to process this. I don't know what to do with these emotions. I don't know how to handle this situation.
It covers a lot of I don't knows.
And then with whatever dusty little sand grain of faith you have, you say,
Thank you for sharing this very personal message. We are all looking for keys and tools that will help us live with this tragedy that has overtaken our kids, and I am glad you have found some. I decided that 2024 would be the year I turned a corner, stepped away from the noxious obsession with what my daughter was doing/planning to do (who knows?) to her body. I am taking it a day at a time, doing a master's degree in art history (moving towards "beauty" as you put it). I have so much to be grateful for, and who knows, this may end well someday.
I have not been able to tell my story, yet. I’m so impressed and grateful for those that have. Your journey has taught me a valuable lesson. Please know that your life torture has not been in vane.
Thank you for your post. I know the Rage well. I also try to keep it under control, flipping from depression to anger to frustration to saddness and back to anger again. I try to work on gratitude for what I have, but my heart is broken. Just taking every day as it comes. Who knows what will happen next?
Beautifully written. Unpopular comment: I believe the use of the words white privilege or the word privilege in general has been used by this cult to make them hate themselves. I never used those words even though we all know who is "privileged" and who isn't. It doesn't need to be constantly pointed out and seen as a negative. I have no ill feelings for someone that worked hard, or was handed family money as long as they are good people. If looking at the bigger picture everyone in the U.S. is more privileged compared to the poorest Country in the world. This does nobody any good to point this out. I say this because my niece was brainwashed with this kind of talk at her University. She ended up hating herself because of it. In my opinion she may have also wanted to be in an oppressed group because she hated being "white and privileged". She also grew up in a rental apartment and had a student loan she still needs to pay off, but had guilt because the University is telling her she is an oppressor. She just had surgery 6 months ago and cut her healthy breasts off. I'm hoping someday she wakes up from this nonsense and leaves the cult.
I agree with you. Critical Race Theory is part of the reason our children are hating themselves. Becoming trans takes them from the bottom of the status hierarchy and puts them up at the top. It is all evil!
"You can never find rational peace whilst watching your child slowly destroy themself" this is so true and utterly terrifying. You wrote a beautiful essay. Thank you for the uplifting advice. When we let go of fear, resentment, anger, and hatred it is so freeing. Continue on your new journey! I hope your daughter returns to you one day and that a deep healing will happen for both of you. A mother's love - like none other. My daughter was never caught up in the trans-cult (thank the good Lord) but she was an addict to alcohol and some street drugs by the time she was in her mid-twenties. I spent many sleepless nights worrying, scared, and terrified that she would end up dead in an alley. She hit rock bottom and went to rehab and is now 5-years clean and sober, and the painful past is now a mere faded memory. It took me a long time to trust her again, and to believe that she was not ever going to go back to that lifestyle. Through these PITT essays, most parents long for their child to return but fear what physical condition and in what state of mind their child will be like if this were to happen. Even parents who child desisted are still full of fear that they might say or do something that will make their child turn around and go right back into the rabbit hole. This trans-cult is beyond evil and is all consuming. But there is hope as my nephew desisted and is doing remarkably well, and we are relieved that he has put this trans ideology nonsense behind him. Just like my daughter's recovery, every child that has been influenced, groomed and brainwashed can be healed. Keep the positive energy flowing and remember to take care of YOU first! Best wishes to you!
Thank you! Your words help a lot.
Thank you for sharing your story. I love the sincerity of your writing. We Christians call this a "testimony," but I understand your reluctance to jump into a religious category. Keep seeking God with a sincere heart. He is faithful and will not disappoint you.
I undertook a cacao ceremony ( which I was very sceptical of at first). The group leader had previously asked us to think about anxieties we would like to rid ourselves of. Mine was acute anxiety about my daughter who although now well has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts. An unanswered phone call or a date with a new man would send me into fear.
During the ceremony we were asked to think about generational trauma and particularly our maternal ancestors. What came to me was my paternal grandmother who died when I was 4. Many years later a relative told me she had desperately feared having another child as she had seen the child, a girl would die. This was in the early 20 th century and the child did die of a bronchial condition at 2 years old.
In that moment I saw my fear was partly inter generational trauma and recognised that I have always feared my daughter would die. It sounds terrible but from that moment my fear left me, I still worry sometimes but that irrational fear has gone. It was quite a revelation.
Astonishing. I wonder if I can find the energy to try your method to gain peace. I am a Christian, and I know I love God, but I have so many worries and don't know how to find His peace. Hoping your recommedations work for me. May your daughter desist soon without permanent damage to her psyche, may her body be healed by good surgery, may her mind and heart be healed from the harm that overwhelmed her. I believe she was literally attacked, spiritually, and not strong enough to understand or resist. I feel the deepest sympathy for parents and siblings of Trans people, I feel sympathy for the Trans people, but often I query why they themselves are unable to feel sympathy for their parents and other family members, why are they so eager to rush into procedures that contradict Nature, why are they so disobedient about listening to the judgement of others who have more experience of life and want to help them accept themselves.
They are a mystery, and I feel such pity for those that do wake up after they have done the most radical surgery etc. and realise how much they have harmed themselves and all for nothing. They still don't like themselves. Surely, it is a great battle between good and evil going on around us. Like you, the best we can do is protect our beloved children from permanent harm by PRAYER, and more prayer. Find the prayer that works for oneself. And do one's own Little Bit by writing to politicians and medical people and school boards etc. too.
Thankyou so much, this was so beautiful and heart felt and practical as well. I cherish your wisdom, your care and love for your daughter and your ability to continue the good fight, for yourself and for us all.
It’s time to fight back with courage instead of fear.💕 Courage is love.
“I think I will now try and find something that will reach through the evil that is surrounding my daughter. There has to be something there that can open her mind. If I have success, I will be sure to let you know.”
I love your post. It’s honestly one of the most helpful posts I have read. I am in a similar situation with my adult son. The greatest influence you can have on your daughter is to pray for her. God alone can crush the evil that is surrounding your daughter and open her mind to the truth. God also works through us. I’m praying for you and your daughter today...🩵
I am so pleased this has helped you in some small way. We are all in this fight against evil together. Thanks for your comment.
Astonishing and beautiful. May the Lord shine his face upon you and your daughter.
Thank you very much. Those words make me feel very emotional (in a good way).
Thank you for this. I was raised in a Christian home, but I was only a surface believer. It has taken going through this trauma with my 18 year old son for me to truly seek God. I have found peace in the midst of this storm. It wanes from time to time with each new blow (finding out that he started hrt in November without me knowing because he is an "adult" now being the latest blow), but it returns each time I hand it over to God. I have been struggling with other relationships and the simple way that you put it (choosing what is lovely) has unlocked something in my mind. Thank you again for sharing this. I pray this nightmare ends for all families this year!
I am so pleased my approach has helped you and I am so thankful we have been given this way to gain peace.
Did you know there's a prayer called the "I don't know" prayer? It's very spiritual. You just go off somewhere quiet and hidden and you walk right up to the heart of God and you say, "I don't know."
I don't know where to go from here. I don't know what is happening. I don't know how to process this. I don't know what to do with these emotions. I don't know how to handle this situation.
It covers a lot of I don't knows.
And then with whatever dusty little sand grain of faith you have, you say,
"But You know."
And you leave it there.
God most certainly hears that prayer.
beautiful. thank you so much for sharing
That is lovely. It sounds similar to giving up what is worrying you. I will certainly try this prayer.
Sharing what has helped you is a truly beautiful act. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing this very personal message. We are all looking for keys and tools that will help us live with this tragedy that has overtaken our kids, and I am glad you have found some. I decided that 2024 would be the year I turned a corner, stepped away from the noxious obsession with what my daughter was doing/planning to do (who knows?) to her body. I am taking it a day at a time, doing a master's degree in art history (moving towards "beauty" as you put it). I have so much to be grateful for, and who knows, this may end well someday.
Thank you.
I have not been able to tell my story, yet. I’m so impressed and grateful for those that have. Your journey has taught me a valuable lesson. Please know that your life torture has not been in vane.
Thank you for your post. I know the Rage well. I also try to keep it under control, flipping from depression to anger to frustration to saddness and back to anger again. I try to work on gratitude for what I have, but my heart is broken. Just taking every day as it comes. Who knows what will happen next?
Beautifully written. Unpopular comment: I believe the use of the words white privilege or the word privilege in general has been used by this cult to make them hate themselves. I never used those words even though we all know who is "privileged" and who isn't. It doesn't need to be constantly pointed out and seen as a negative. I have no ill feelings for someone that worked hard, or was handed family money as long as they are good people. If looking at the bigger picture everyone in the U.S. is more privileged compared to the poorest Country in the world. This does nobody any good to point this out. I say this because my niece was brainwashed with this kind of talk at her University. She ended up hating herself because of it. In my opinion she may have also wanted to be in an oppressed group because she hated being "white and privileged". She also grew up in a rental apartment and had a student loan she still needs to pay off, but had guilt because the University is telling her she is an oppressor. She just had surgery 6 months ago and cut her healthy breasts off. I'm hoping someday she wakes up from this nonsense and leaves the cult.
I agree with you. Critical Race Theory is part of the reason our children are hating themselves. Becoming trans takes them from the bottom of the status hierarchy and puts them up at the top. It is all evil!