Transgender Journey: The Evildoers and Cowards We've Met Along the Way

Believe me, based on my first-hand experiences, many of these people want control of your child’s mind and body and they are willing to use the force of law to get you out of the way.

(Before you read what I’ve written below, it might be helpful to read two earlier posts. One is called Who Am I? and the other is The Day My Daughter Told Me She Was Not My Daughter.)

I don’t write here as much as I had planned or as much as I wish I would. I have so much in draft that I can’t bring myself to edit. I have many hours of audio recordings of meetings with doctors and psychotherapists and public health workers where we are betrayed time after time by cowards posing as compassionate professionals. I think a lot about these recordings but can’t bring myself to listen to them.

On most days it’s the despair that’s holding me back. On other days it’s anger. On some days it’s a mixture of despair, anger, guilt, frustration… etc. That describes a lot of my days over the last two years, as everywhere we go to try to find help for our daughter, we are treated like the enemy and betrayed by those who claim to have good intentions. Here are some of the evildoers and cowards we’ve met along the way:

• The Discord groomers (read about Discord here) who invited her into their space, convinced her that all her problems would be solved if she transitioned, and convinced her that we were hateful, transphobic bigots who needed to be dealt with violently. 

• The ER nurse who separated us from our mentally unstable daughter, asked her questions in private, didn’t tell us what she said, and recommended a treatment course without our input.

• The social worker at the hospital who, wearing the latest pride flag configuration on her lanyard,  subjected us to an hour-long interview about our “parenting methods.”

• The lawyer who advised us not to stick our necks out because this is a fight we can’t win. “Just play along,” he said.

• The staff psychologist at the hospital who, only very reluctantly and grudgingly, let our daughter go home with us after her stay there.

• The local school board that willfully works behind parents’ backs, conspiring against us by hiding information from us, even if our children are as young as four years old. From their policies: “The school will change a student’s official records to reflect a change in gender upon request from the student in question. Parental / guardian consent is not required to make this change, regardless of the age of the child. Schools must always consult with the student about how official records such as report cards are shared, as these documents may inadvertently out the student.”

• The local school board employees who seem sympathetic to the plight of parents but tell us can’t do anything about it because “this comes down from the government.”

• The public school teachers who cheer on this nonsense and proudly insert themselves between children and their parents, who imagine themselves to be heroes but who are actually the destroyers of children’s souls and bodies.

• The other public school teachers who say they are against the indoctrination that’s happening but won’t speak up.

• The public school guidance counselor who threatened to call the local Children’s Aid Society to report us for not being “affirming.”

• The multiple psychotherapists we have tried to work with, each of whom has betrayed our trust so deeply we find it difficult to find our daughter another psychotherapist, even though she needs this help. 

• The pediatrician who (privately, to us) decries and laments the wreckage that gender ideology is causing in our society, but who nonetheless still always asks us to leave the room when he talks to our daughter and then seems to prescribe a course of treatment according to her whims.

• The public health nurse who visited our home and tried to gently turn us in the “right direction.” And then the follow-up phone call informing us that our case couldn’t be closed until our daughter (whose biological identity they refuse to acknowledge) says it can be closed.

• The Liberal government of Canada, which put forward a bill that calls 2,000 years of Christian belief and practice “myths and stereotypes” and threatens us will legal consequences for engaging in “conversion therapy” if we don’t bow down and worship the heinous lies they define as truth.

• Our “Conservative” Members of Parliament who voted for the bill put forward by the aforementioned Liberal government, one of whom later said she didn’t understand it completely when she voted for it and would stand beside those of us who opposed it if we ran into trouble. (We shall see.)

• The local Children’s Aid Society, which works in concert with our provincial “Conservative” government. These people are not shy about posting guidelines online that proclaim that “In some cases, it may be necessary to bring a child or youth to a place of safety while parents or caregivers learn how to better support their LGBT2SQ children and youth” and that “In situations where a parent-child separation is required, the chosen placement should be one that affirms the child or youth’s LGBT2SQ identity…” 

  Putting them into these “affirming” foster homes means, and I quote: “allowing them to freely and openly express their identity. This includes supporting a child or youth’s choice of clothing or hairstyle, which can be important aspects of self-expression. It may also include supporting access to tools (e.g., chest binders, packers, stand-to-pee devices), gender-confirming health care and/ or interventions (e.g., hormone treatments, hair removal) that for some children and youth may help them to feel their body better aligns with their gender identity.” 

Obviously, I could - and hopefully will - write an article on each of these people and our experiences with them, but for today all you get is this listing and venting. 

Believe me, based on my first-hand experiences, many of these people want control of your child’s mind and body and they are willing to use the force of law to get you out of the way.