37 Comments

This is so painful - so sad. The school system is interfering with the family dynamics and it is wrong! Use your voice to be heard! Fight back. We must not allow the trusted teachers and school administration to side against us by allowing the trans-ideology to poison and steal the minds and bodies of our children. Enough is enough! Teachers at my nephews high school contributed to his confusion by encouraging the use of his trans-ID name and sneaking behind his parents back. This must stop! Schools are intended to teach our children facts, truth, history, tools such as math - not to embrace false ideology. Horrifying. Praying for your daughter and her safety.

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If it's safe to send your daughter to that school, then it's safe to say all of this to the school administration.

If it's not safe to say this to the administration--if you intuitively or explicitly know that they will harm you for disagreeing with them--then imagine what it's like to be a vulnerable child whom they have power over. And get her out of there now.

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👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

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Well done, you have provided some excellent references. Importantly did you manage to send this to your child's teacher.

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As a Jew, I have vehemently been opposed to the comparison of Trump to being Nazi or political figures in the U.S. Now, with the legalization, medical, physical mutilation of children's genitalia and lopping off of breasts by “ educators, planned parenthood, trans “ “advocates” ie activists, surgeons, nurses, anesthesiologist, it is crystal clear…they are all like Nazi collaborators. They are of sick mind they are protecting trans children from their parents who will reject their new pronouns and status. Also, they are intentionally creating an “ army of trans for their utopian future which will be the destruction of the nuclear family and normalization of deviants and misfits, which in their minds, were too long have living in the shadows. Hence, Nancy Pelosi, speaker of the House, in a dance party with Rue Paul and drag Queens and normalizing drag queens(men dressed as women) in K-12) schools as groomers. Protect your children with life and limb.

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You made some excellent points about how schools are now handling this issue. They have taken parents rights and thrown them in the garbage bin. This should not be happening in our schools. If something is going on with a child, the parent should always be involved and included. Excluding parents from knowing what is happening at school - especially something as drastic as identifying as the opposite gender - is just plain wrong. Administrators and teachers need to question the ideology that says it's OK to keep secrets from parents.

I hope this horrible trend stops very soon. I am thankful every day that my kids are out of K-12 school. I wish you lots of luck in dealing with this. I truly hope you are successful.

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Thank you for sharing this. Thank you for sharing this. I'm afraid schools intentionally keep students' 'transitioning' a secret from parents. The goal is to make children believe that parents are their enemies.

Trans cult brainwashes kids into beliefs that everything that parents did they did wrong: they "assigned" a 'wrong' gender, gave a 'wrong' name, and raised kids according to the 'wrong stereotypes,' Of course, since parents are "transphobic bigots", the solution is to lie to parents and to seek 'help' from teachers. Parents become enemies, and a school becomes savers, new and better parents.

Turning kids against their parents is how communists and Nazis used to gain complete power over the population. American Neo-Marxists found a way how to make it profitable. I believe that it's time for parents and communities to start fighting back.

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I am so sorry this is happening to you and your child.

Anonymous letters that you aren’t going to send don’t really help though, do they.

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I don't see anywhere that this parent said he or she wouldn't or didn't send this letter.

But even if the letter wasn't sent to the administrator in question: do you really think essays at PITT "don't really help though?" Is it worthless for parents to share their experiences and concerns here? Essays like this can alert other concerned parents to the issues they raise--like the very real phenomenon of a school hiding a child's trans-ID from her parents. (I knew about this, because it happened to me 4-5 years ago.)

If you're a regular reader or contributor, you'll notice that a number of parents who write for this cite use an epistolary form, like this one--sometimes to a child, a friend, an ex-friend, an institution, etc. Other writers contribute third-person essays. The thing that PITT gives parents is a place to say our piece, in a world that's eager to scream "TRANSPHOBE" or "HATER" or "HERETIC" at us.

The world is so full of great advice for parents of teenagers these days--insisting that we BE KIND and AFFIRM AFFIRM AFFIRM and instructing us on the language we MUST use and the language we MUST NEVER use. I like reading the essays at PITT because it offers parents a space in which they can express whatever opinions they have, report whatever their experiences are in whatever language they like. And yes, that's very helpful--cathartic for the writer, who's dealing with a very stressful family situation, and can lead to more awareness and support for families like the writer's.

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And yet, pretending to write a letter instead of actually writing a letter is still just pretending to fight.

Literary conceits are fine as long as we’re not deceiving ourselves about their effectiveness.

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Is it possible to sue the individual teacher or administrator for alienation of affection?

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I found this part in one of the links very important for us parents when we are urged to affirm ( by our kids, the school or medical establishment):

“there is no test to distinguish between persisting gender dysphoria and transient adolescent dysphoria. Moreover, the risk of over-diagnosis is real, as evidenced by the growing number of young adults wishing to detransition [c]. It is, therefore, appropriate to extend the phase of psychological care as much as possible.”

I have not heard one medical or mental health professional in this country talk about it being “transient” .

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If you look at the psychological literature from the 1970s-1990s, there was recognition of the concept of the "pre-gay" child; that is, a child who was gender non-conforming who may also have endured sex dysphoria/insistence that he/she was the opposite sex. This was understood to be very common among children who would grow up to be gay or lesbian, and parents of these children were counseled to be patient and to see what happens. (I.E. "watchful waiting.")

We don't have to go back very far to see how much wisdom we've forgotten, and so quickly. But then, big pharma and surgeons didn't have the okey-doke and the go-ahead from the American insurance companies then like they do now.

We're performing experimental cosmetic medicine & surgery on children - and it's not the best surgeons and endos who do this kind of work. Oh, no--it's the real cowboys, the Dr. Frankensteins, the butchers and the pirates.

I retract that last noun. That gives pirates a bad name. ARRRRRRRGGHHHHH!

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I went through something similar at my son's HS. I don't know how to express my feelings - the words - except to say the schools are destroying our children.

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How would the naive yet prolific not pull one into the void from which they come and shall return,

Or expect to be raised from the murky waters of identical reeds into the crown of a unique old tree?

Indeed a deadly ball and chain.

But the aim is low ever to reach that imagined credulous creature whose timeless relentless sacrifice

Turns them into an unlikely target

Because she is invisible.

If you wait, you will glimpse her strength though, and you will see a beast, so beautiful and so strong,

Raising above an ever growing bed of reeds which sunshine never quite reaches

Like an old oak tree

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Thank you for speaking out! Laws designed to protect children from the rare abusive parent assume that the health care providers and teachers and schools know abuse when they see it. Now we have sound, loving parenting defined as abusive and teaching children lies that they are separate from their bodies defined as support. It is upside down and backwards and we parents are screaming behind a soundproof glass wall. When will they believe our tears?

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One of the reasons I left working at a middle school is that I was not allowed to say "Good morning boys and girls" Now I work at a pre school and I can utter this seemingly harmless phrase!!!

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July 11, 2022
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Dear trans child no doubt if I complain of a headache someone with terminal cancer might find it annoying but I am still entitled to my own experience

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This entire experience has destroyed my trust in almost everything, but absolutely in K-12 education and academia.

I listen to the podcast Gender a Wider Lens for perspective. I’ve learned a lot, and they are gender critical.

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I’m in the same boat with my teenager and am constantly drafting a letter in my head to my daughter’s high school. Thank you for providing such great resources. (I wish there were more stats on social transitioning post-puberty.) And for the inspiration to write a similar letter. Let us know if you ever send it.

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Thank you! What did you plug into google?

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UK Tavistock gender clinic referrals. You can do this for Sweden, Australia too. In the US, we don't keep track of these numbers.

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Gotcha thanks again.

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There are not many studies on teens who suddenly identify because this is a more recent phenomenon, starting around 2013 and escalating during the pandemic.

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Right. Which furthers the argument to slow the F down, huh? But of course that would be transphobic. Gotta smack my head against a wall now….

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Well said, thank you for being one of those moms who stands up to the truth.

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