158 Comments

100%. The diagnosis of ADHD & finding the right medication to help her manage it has been a complete game-changer for her. I was referring to the Autism spectrum, which no, not all people are on.

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Sell everything and move far away. Now.

Don't shilly-shally or worry about the car payments or give a second thought about missing your friends in the knitting circle. This is about the very survival of your kid as an intact and functioning human being. Think big. Act big.

Best is to move abroad: Mexico or Costa Rica or Italy or Poland or Greece or Croatia or some forgotten harbor in the Caribbean - any place where people are still basically normal. It's not hard to get easily-renewed 6 month tourist visas in many of these places if you're American or Canadian. Many of them can be very affordable if you rent a home with the natives and stay away from the tourist circuit. Live off your savings if you can't keep doing your old job online. Find a full-remote job even if it is beneath you - JetBlue customer service or the like that simply requires a phone line and a semi-functional internet connection. Before you leave, find a mail holding-and-forwarding service so you can still have a U.S. address for convenience purposes.

Home school or un-school or call it a sabbatical or just be a truant when it comes to education - if your kid can already read and write and do basic algebra and geometry she can always get a skilled job in a trade like HVAC. She doesn't need more K-12 education right now. She needs normalcy and morals, not college-credit English Lit.

Give her the space she needs to grow past this unfortunate phase. No half-measures. Get out. Now. After a year of detox maybe you'll all be in a position to come home. But don't skimp.

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I wouldn't send my child to most 4 year colleges if you paid me to, regardless of their mental health. Most colleges are no longer institutions of learning but centers for leftist indoctrination.

You already flushed money down the toilet paying for a bonehead therapist to take your child's hand and run headlong into her delusion. Do not give any money to universities or professors who will teach her to hate you while she destroys her body.

Cut off contact with anyone who affirms your daughter's delusions. They are either knowingly helping your daughter towards body mutilation, which makes them horrible people, or unknowingly doing it, which makes them fools.

Neither one of those type of people have any business being in contact with your daughter. They may seem "nice" but they are not friends.

As far as her wearing chest binders goes I would recommend doing what my old man did to me when I was wearing clothing he didn't like. Take it away, throw it away, and don't buy her anymore.

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1. Do NOT send her off to a 4 year college.

2. Help her get a job (at least for a few years) somewhere with kind, but more traditional, adult role models.

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Our daughter didn't have a computer or phone in private spaces until she went to college. And she was in HS just before smart phones arrived, so she had as little access to the Internet as was possible. She did have her phone during the day. You might want to read this: https://pitt.substack.com/p/transgenders-connection-with-pornography?fbclid=IwAR18P1Ai0vpWvM-lMTBaufXGKv3wreQJMywG-ZSNeAnnN1aq1m_QxaKi20Q

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Don’t beat your self up ….you did what you thought best at the time, …

that therapist sounds dangerous, …that whole “they will kill themselves”, is and was a fabricated lie. Don’t pay for her to go to college, ….if you can….there are many places that are “volunteer working with wildlife for one or two months, sometimes more. You pay a fee and it will give her a break from the insanity and something positive to focus on. Animals are magical and these programs build character and take the focus off oneself. There are so many to chose from, she can help elephants, or orangutans, sloths, Sun bears (https://www.bsbcc.org.my/).

https://discovercorps.com/landing/volunteer-vacations-destinations/?utm_source=google_search&utm_medium=search_text&utm_campaign=dc_volunteer&utm_term=volunteer_program&creative=613646104054&keyword=volunteer%20travel&matchtype=b&network=g&device=c&gad=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI8Ia75eDd_gIVjC2tBh1qhA_KEAAYASAAEgJp6fD_BwE,

They are so many choices..

just type in volunteer for animals vacation and so many will pop up. Any kind of distraction and removal .❤️ I wish you well

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I have 6 years and have decided I am not funding it. Unless post secondary changes there will be trade school or Jordan Peterson University. I hope everyone here has checked out UTX where Kathleen Stock is a fellow. But ya, getting a degree or diploma to get a good woke job in a woke company for a woke wage pales in comparison to the urgency and need to get out of the cult of confusion. I would rather my child work at McDonald's and know who they are than live through such a woke nightmare.

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"A lot of these kids commit suicide otherwise"

I'd love to see the list of kids that they can prove committed suicide because they were "trans" and not affirmed. Specifically because they were not affirmed.

I think that will be a very short list. I think it will be 0.

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Today is National Day of Prayer

In my War Room All Day, had to share.

Listen live here

https://afr.net/talk-player/

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Thank you for expressing what so many of us (all of us?) experience. I agree that it sounds like you are taking each decision carefully and doing the best that you can. Sometimes what works for one child backfires for another.

The only suggestion I can offer is that the detransitioners are so very kind and many of them want to help others not go down this path. The detrans Reddit is very enlightening. There’s also an ask detrans subreddit for people like us to interact and ask questions. I saw a detransitioner post on there that she was very willing to speak with teens about it, to help parents. Also the detransitioner YouTube videos are so impactful. I think they might have swayed my daughter if I had known about them while she was in high school.

Maybe you can ask your child to watch with you, just to give it a chance. Be prepared that they have been told not to listen to detransitioners. So you have to find the perfect timing.

Praying for all of our children and families.

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I’m thinking you were probably a good parent, we all do our best but sometimes things are odd for awhile. Don’t beat yourself up but rather think of all the times you went above and beyond. We all have something, I have been estranged from my son for 4 years for reasons unknown. I know that we did right by him even though no one is perfect.

I hope for your daughter that her brain finishes maturing - hopefully faster than average. That front part is not mature until around 25 and that part also helps process things to make good decisions. I hear given enough time most grow past it. My heart hurts for you. Please take care of yourself and know that you did a good job as a parent, for some reason she is just lost right now. Peace to you.

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Loved this line : understand that emotional pain cannot be fixed surgically.

I relate to much of this. It sucks

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May 4, 2023·edited May 4, 2023

If you need a sock puppet to help you troll, you're doing it wrong. (not directed at the original post here to clarify)

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100 percent my thoughts, where I am at, and things I think about, except I only have a year left. Your comment about college was interesting. I'll have to look more into that. Maybe community College, stay at home more in my control and just 100 percent pay for everything and dis ourage a job to allow even a couple more years to develop herself emotionally? IDK.

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So a bit of a tangent. I’m a pediatrician. Today there was a case presentation of a teen who overdosed in a suicide attempt. She was noted to be ‘non binary’ whatever that means. However in the presentation she was referee to as ‘she’ and not ‘they’ multiple times because no one can really keep up with that stupid language pronoun crap. Also her main problem is severe mental illness. I view the non binary as a symptom. Not a diagnosis.

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Yes, we've all asked ourselves this. Then I spoke with my sister who raised her daughter in almost the opposite environment of where we live, believed almost the opposite of me, and yet, her daughter went in the same direction as mine. Both of our girls are on the spectrum and I wonder if that is what it all came down to: quirky girls desperate to fit into some category and find the black and white thinking of trans sums it all up in a neat package. I've just resolved to stop thinking about the how of the past and laser focus on what in the hell happened to our society. We spend more time dealing with the trans stuff then being able to focus on her eating disorder (which could kill her). This is so not right! I spend countless hours a week navigating with a scalpel to find doctors who won't privately/boldly/naively tell them to go to a gender clinic to solve all their ills (I've found 2 out of 100's). And walking away from friends and family who have no idea what we're going through and think we're overblowing all of it. I feel rage. But I also feel proud and confident that I know that I'm doing the best for my child. She is very close to us thankfully and is starting to see just how badly these doctors have harmed her. All she wants is a doctor she can trust. Will these doctors ever wake up??!!

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