With great sadness, I know exactly how you feel and am feeling such severe pain and loss from my young adult son who’s been transitioning the last 5 years. I’m not sure if he’s done the surgery yet (and I don’t want to know cause honestly I’m not sure I am strong enough to know). He won’t have anything to do with me even though I would s…
With great sadness, I know exactly how you feel and am feeling such severe pain and loss from my young adult son who’s been transitioning the last 5 years. I’m not sure if he’s done the surgery yet (and I don’t want to know cause honestly I’m not sure I am strong enough to know). He won’t have anything to do with me even though I would still like to be in his life and spend time with him but not on his terms. With a bit of compromise that I won’t call him he/him or his birth name but I also won’t call him she/her or his new name. I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy. As a loving and dedicated mother who sacrificed everything raising this child, I am completely devastated and feel like I’ve lost him to an evil ideology that is harming him in so many ways. My daughter though is kind enough when she’s around me, to call him by his birth name even though I know she goes along with it in his presence. I too, worry about the following generations and where all this exposure to so many trans people who have been manipulated and haven’t been able to except their true selves so in turn they believe that this will be the miracle, the answer, or the cure to all their problems, when it’s only going to bring on a slew of many more problems most importantly including dangerous side effects and severe health problems. This isn’t how I ever saw his once promising future. He had everything going for him and now he has dropped out of college, feels lonely and still seems to be searching for something more. I hate to think about how much of his life he will spend (time and money) on trying to transition to “be” a woman, which he never ever will be, and the harm that will entail. My heart is broken, completely shattered but I keep going for my daughter, and I mourn his decision to do this every single day since he announced it. I am so sorry that these people who make this dangerous and devastating life altering decision feel so much pain and conflict, and can’t find the peace and acceptance they need to feel complete. But I know 100%, that this isn’t going to heal them. And I’m so very sorry and feel so much empathy for all the family members and friends who feel this loss, pain, and have to mourn everyday for their loved one who is self harming and suffering. May we all find peace and find a way out of these dangerous waters. For now, let’s keep our head up above those waters and stay positive that this too shall pass. Take care and keep fighting.
Jeasica, your story is almost identical to mine and my family. It is my older son who is doing this and being affirmed by my ex husband who had alienated him from me 5 years ago, then because my son was depressed, struggling and had trauma he became convinced he is trans. The heartache, grief, powerlessness and loss threatens to overwhelm me at times. I stay alive for my younger son who is also heartbroken and living in the same house with him and my ex. I pray that they wake up, we can't control the lies they are being fed or the cult that has taken them. We can control our response so I try to keep connection be sending loving messages.
You are not alone. The problem is that we can't talk about this for fear of losing them for good and the press and institutions are still framing this phenomenon as a wonderful kind thing.
Stay steady and keep reaching out when you can. For now that seems all we can do. I pray all the time time for God to intercede on my son's behalf.
I’m so thankful I found this support group cause now after reading so many replies to my post I feel a little less alone and am finding some comfort in other’s words of advice and wisdom. This has been a lonely, dark, grueling and painful 5 years and sometimes I wonder how I’ve made it this long, staying as strong as I have. I want my son back. I want him healthy and happy again. I would do almost anything to experience that once again, but without having to affirm this delusional idea that he’s a woman. A man can never be a woman as a woman can never be a man. It’s really that simple. The insanity around this has pushed me into such a dark place I get so angry and want to lash out at every individual that supports this madness and inhumane idea. I strongly oppose this radical, delusional idea everyday for his safety, health and happiness, in exchange for him to just push me away and say that I’m a bigot and a horrible mother who would end up seeing her son commit suicide if I don’t agree; and I take this on every day because of my commitment and undying immense amount of love I have for this child. He says I’m selfish cause I’m hurting so badly and that I’m not thinking about his pain but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. I wish these cult-like people would lose their grip they have on my son and he could see who is truly there for him and loves him unconditionally. I will continue to send him loving messages and always remind him that I love him and will be there for him til the day I die. And only because of the immeasurable amount of love and care I have for him is exactly why I won’t affirm anything that will harm or endanger him. I will never forgive or forget what these so-called professionals are doing to our loved ones. They should all be tried and convicted of crimes against humanity and I hope one day very soon they all will be. In the meantime I will continue to fight the fight and hold hope that my son will return and I will be able to hug him and laugh with him once again.
Oh Jeasica....I am so sorry you are going through this (and so many others).
When talking to members of the trans-identified cult, like your son, I don't think reasoning typically works, which you (and probably many other parents) probably already found out the hard way.
I think the best thing to do is to continue to stand our ground via easily-remembered SLOGANS, like "Biology is NOT bigotry", which I read in someone else's substack, and just keep repeating them.
Unfortunately, we have to be prepared, when we talk to these trans-identified individuals, for them to LASH OUT with THEIR OWN prepared statements, given that most of them are getting so much online training in what to say and think. Mostly, we aren't even talking to the individual we remember anymore, but some kind of trans-identified cult ROBOT.
So, if they engage past our slogans like "Biology is NOT bigotry", have other short slogans at-the-ready. You can think of your own, of course, but I thought of:
-"Your discomfort is part of the medical establishment's programming".
-"Detransitioners speak the truth".
Again, once you engage, they will likely engage again with you or throw a fit and walk away in a tantrum (or worse....some are getting physically violent, in what the transmafia views as an ACCEPTABLE form of violence).
Be prepared for anything. Look into self-defense, as I have, just in case.
I hope this helps. I am including my direct email at the bottom of this email in case you want a friend. As I have said before to others, you are NOT alone.
Couldn’t have said it any better. So true. And the cult (LBTQIA+abcd…) reminds him everyday of what an evil mom I am and he’s much better without me. I wish he would see they are not his true friends and don’t care about him and he is shutting out and pushing away the ones who do love and care for him. I really appreciate your kind words and wisdom. I am so happy to have found like-minded people who haven’t been brainwashed to believe a biological man can ever be a woman. The insanity has really taken a toll on all of us I’m sure. I wish I could find some of these people here in Denver cause I could really use some friends that don’t look at me like the enemy.
With great sadness, I know exactly how you feel and am feeling such severe pain and loss from my young adult son who’s been transitioning the last 5 years. I’m not sure if he’s done the surgery yet (and I don’t want to know cause honestly I’m not sure I am strong enough to know). He won’t have anything to do with me even though I would still like to be in his life and spend time with him but not on his terms. With a bit of compromise that I won’t call him he/him or his birth name but I also won’t call him she/her or his new name. I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy. As a loving and dedicated mother who sacrificed everything raising this child, I am completely devastated and feel like I’ve lost him to an evil ideology that is harming him in so many ways. My daughter though is kind enough when she’s around me, to call him by his birth name even though I know she goes along with it in his presence. I too, worry about the following generations and where all this exposure to so many trans people who have been manipulated and haven’t been able to except their true selves so in turn they believe that this will be the miracle, the answer, or the cure to all their problems, when it’s only going to bring on a slew of many more problems most importantly including dangerous side effects and severe health problems. This isn’t how I ever saw his once promising future. He had everything going for him and now he has dropped out of college, feels lonely and still seems to be searching for something more. I hate to think about how much of his life he will spend (time and money) on trying to transition to “be” a woman, which he never ever will be, and the harm that will entail. My heart is broken, completely shattered but I keep going for my daughter, and I mourn his decision to do this every single day since he announced it. I am so sorry that these people who make this dangerous and devastating life altering decision feel so much pain and conflict, and can’t find the peace and acceptance they need to feel complete. But I know 100%, that this isn’t going to heal them. And I’m so very sorry and feel so much empathy for all the family members and friends who feel this loss, pain, and have to mourn everyday for their loved one who is self harming and suffering. May we all find peace and find a way out of these dangerous waters. For now, let’s keep our head up above those waters and stay positive that this too shall pass. Take care and keep fighting.
Jeasica, your story is almost identical to mine and my family. It is my older son who is doing this and being affirmed by my ex husband who had alienated him from me 5 years ago, then because my son was depressed, struggling and had trauma he became convinced he is trans. The heartache, grief, powerlessness and loss threatens to overwhelm me at times. I stay alive for my younger son who is also heartbroken and living in the same house with him and my ex. I pray that they wake up, we can't control the lies they are being fed or the cult that has taken them. We can control our response so I try to keep connection be sending loving messages.
You are not alone. The problem is that we can't talk about this for fear of losing them for good and the press and institutions are still framing this phenomenon as a wonderful kind thing.
Stay steady and keep reaching out when you can. For now that seems all we can do. I pray all the time time for God to intercede on my son's behalf.
I’m so thankful I found this support group cause now after reading so many replies to my post I feel a little less alone and am finding some comfort in other’s words of advice and wisdom. This has been a lonely, dark, grueling and painful 5 years and sometimes I wonder how I’ve made it this long, staying as strong as I have. I want my son back. I want him healthy and happy again. I would do almost anything to experience that once again, but without having to affirm this delusional idea that he’s a woman. A man can never be a woman as a woman can never be a man. It’s really that simple. The insanity around this has pushed me into such a dark place I get so angry and want to lash out at every individual that supports this madness and inhumane idea. I strongly oppose this radical, delusional idea everyday for his safety, health and happiness, in exchange for him to just push me away and say that I’m a bigot and a horrible mother who would end up seeing her son commit suicide if I don’t agree; and I take this on every day because of my commitment and undying immense amount of love I have for this child. He says I’m selfish cause I’m hurting so badly and that I’m not thinking about his pain but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. I wish these cult-like people would lose their grip they have on my son and he could see who is truly there for him and loves him unconditionally. I will continue to send him loving messages and always remind him that I love him and will be there for him til the day I die. And only because of the immeasurable amount of love and care I have for him is exactly why I won’t affirm anything that will harm or endanger him. I will never forgive or forget what these so-called professionals are doing to our loved ones. They should all be tried and convicted of crimes against humanity and I hope one day very soon they all will be. In the meantime I will continue to fight the fight and hold hope that my son will return and I will be able to hug him and laugh with him once again.
Oh Jeasica....I am so sorry you are going through this (and so many others).
When talking to members of the trans-identified cult, like your son, I don't think reasoning typically works, which you (and probably many other parents) probably already found out the hard way.
I think the best thing to do is to continue to stand our ground via easily-remembered SLOGANS, like "Biology is NOT bigotry", which I read in someone else's substack, and just keep repeating them.
Unfortunately, we have to be prepared, when we talk to these trans-identified individuals, for them to LASH OUT with THEIR OWN prepared statements, given that most of them are getting so much online training in what to say and think. Mostly, we aren't even talking to the individual we remember anymore, but some kind of trans-identified cult ROBOT.
So, if they engage past our slogans like "Biology is NOT bigotry", have other short slogans at-the-ready. You can think of your own, of course, but I thought of:
-"Your discomfort is part of the medical establishment's programming".
-"Detransitioners speak the truth".
Again, once you engage, they will likely engage again with you or throw a fit and walk away in a tantrum (or worse....some are getting physically violent, in what the transmafia views as an ACCEPTABLE form of violence).
Be prepared for anything. Look into self-defense, as I have, just in case.
I hope this helps. I am including my direct email at the bottom of this email in case you want a friend. As I have said before to others, you are NOT alone.
-Joanna from NYC's Medical Freedom Alliance
Email: JoannaVitalHealth@protonmail.com
Couldn’t have said it any better. So true. And the cult (LBTQIA+abcd…) reminds him everyday of what an evil mom I am and he’s much better without me. I wish he would see they are not his true friends and don’t care about him and he is shutting out and pushing away the ones who do love and care for him. I really appreciate your kind words and wisdom. I am so happy to have found like-minded people who haven’t been brainwashed to believe a biological man can ever be a woman. The insanity has really taken a toll on all of us I’m sure. I wish I could find some of these people here in Denver cause I could really use some friends that don’t look at me like the enemy.
Great words!