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Diagnosis, diagnosis, diagnosis - why do you believe the Psychologists about one (ASD) and not the other (trans)?

We have a established a state religion in America and Psychology is its name. You have helped these goons label your children long before "trans" entered the picture. You've allowed them to define them by their flaws, and taken *their* word about your own children as gospel for years, if not decades. That they have rejected "ASD" - a diagnosis which classes them with the severely retarded - in favor of more fun & flattering identities is utterly unsurprising.

If this "trans" debacle does not prove to people at large that Psychology is dangerous cultic nonsense then we are utterly lost. It is not science, it is not medicine - it is merely secular dogma, asserted with no basis in anything but the say-so of people who say they are the say-soers. Do not let these narcissistic quacks into your life or you will come to severely regret it - we see the results of their so-called practice here every day.

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There are ordinary medical doctors diagnosing children as trans too. So are you going to just die quietly at home if you get chest pains because those stupid doctors wouldn't know what they were talking about anyway?

Autism's real. SOMETHING there is different enough to cause a lot of difficulty in social interaction for the people experiencing it. Do I think we have it 100% figured out? No. We're still looking it over, still sorting things through. But there's SOMETHING there.

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The diagnostic criteria were laid down by Psychologists in their book of catechism. We take that book as gospel in America so we should expect people in every profession to act in accordance with it. We are probably not far from there being gender-affirming dentistry as well - men do have larger teeth, after all, necessitating shavedowns for those becoming women and add-ons for those becoming men.

It's rather odd to assert that a thing is for-certain real when we are, as you say, unable to actually define that thing thus far. The thing might be real or the thing might not be real, but until we know what the thing is even supposed to be, it's not a question we can even begin to investigate.

And - listen carefully - *even if* there were found an in-common biological defect linking "high functioners" with the severely disabled, that would not justify applying the same term to both groups. Children have ears. Children know it when you apply labels to them. They might not know exactly what is going on when their parent talks in a hushed tone with other adults while glancing at their "odd" child - but they get the general sense of it.

It's for this reason that we stopped calling people "retarded" among many other terms. When something becomes a widely-used term of abuse, it's harmful to continue to use it in a medical context. Even if someone is clearly "retarded", we don't use that term. So why do we label perfectly-capable-if-odd children with a word that also applies to those incapable of even cleaning themselves? Plus, if you spend even a fraction of a minute in youth spaces online, it will become clear to you immediately that "autist" is a term of abuse among young people in the present day.

Continuing to label people with a word that conjures drooling freaks in the popular imagination - and which is widely used as an insult already - is just a gobsmackingly obviously stupid and cruel thing to do. It's as clear as broad daylight that it's intensely harmful. Even if you, for some godforsaken reason, think there needs to be a special word that encompasses so many people who are all sorts of different, with differing abilities and differing needs, can you maybe be polite and just call them "different" and explain their individual idiosyncrasies as need arises? You're not a doctor and we aren't speaking in a medical context so it hardly matters what the technical terms are, *even if* the theoretical link between all these people were proven, which, might I remind you, *it is not.* This uncontrollable, overreaching urge to label and to box is exactly how we got to gender madness. Enough with it.

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A. My husband and I realized that we were autistic when we were trying to figure out our kids. It explained so much about our own history. Neither ourselves nor our children are embarrassed about it or feel "less than" because of it. It means we think differently in predictable ways. That we have both certain difficulties and talents. That's all. If you think it conjures drooling freaks - that's on you. It doesn't for most people and we could not care less if there are still uneducated people out there. If I say Asperger's to another parent or teacher, they get a very clear picture and it doesn't involve drooling. But it's accurate. I'm sorry they've dropped the term Asperger's and lump all of autism together, but high-functioning autism still is shorthand for exactly how myself, my husband, and my kids think.

B. It's well established that children on the spectrum are more likely to latch onto trans as an explanation for their difficulties. Same with other neuro divergencies. Children who are very black and white in their thinking tend to grab for simple explanations and have a very hard time letting go. Complexity and gray areas are much harder to grasp and deal with.

C. As far as other diagnosis? Yeah - well when you've seen a kid in the middle of a depressive episode (and you have your own experiences with that), or in a manic episode, and then you see a night and day difference when on a medication that works? Yeah, I'll take that as prima facia evidence that the doctor's diagnosis was spot on. It's not like I'm the one who diagnosed my kids. Now the fact that she kept looking for more and more things to diagnose herself with? That she'd start imitating the symptoms, and then claim she had something that she'd shown no signs of prior to looking it up? That's on her.

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A: What a surprise that your children turned out to have similar personalities and affects to you, their parents. Actually, that's the least surprising thing in the world.

I am quite obviously not speaking of my own views on people termed autistic by Psychologists - rather I think they are among the most misunderstood and mistreated people - I am rather speaking of the common use of the term "autist" as an insult. If you don't think that the term is used that way, you are simply ignorant of youth vernacular in the present day.

When you tell another parent or a teacher - without your child's consent - that your child "is" this way or "has" this disorder, you are coloring that parent or teacher's attitude toward your child before they even meet him. This is a robbery from your child. It is a robbery of his or her right to define his or her own self.

You may earnestly believe that you yourself would treat a child labeled "autistic" no differently from one with no label - I think you would be wrong but you may earnestly believe that. But will you really assert that no one you tell will have their perception of your child prejudiced by this diagnosed identity? Ludicrous. Let your child interact with people from a blank slate and make his or her own impression without these preconceived "warnings" you are giving to people. Would you like to have lived your whole life with your parent warning all the grown-ups that you were "different?"

B: This correlation involves the obvious complication of selection bias. Children who are given over to Psychology-based treatments by their parents are inherently far more likely to be diagnosed as "autistic" and subsequently "trans" than children who are not taken in for Psychology-based treatments at all. Rates of both "disorders" are closely correlated with rates of seeking Psychology-based treatments for all ethnic groups. Caucasian people purchase lots of Psychology-based services for their children, and their children have the highest rates of trans & autism, while Asians, Hispanics & African-Americans are less frequent consumers of Psychology-based treatments, and have much lower rates of autism & trans in their kids.

You'll likely say, "that just means 'autism' is underdiagnosed in these groups" - which is, not coincidentally, exactly what genderists say to deny ROGD. The truth is, as you said, children are very black-and-white in their thinking - they don't understand the purported differences between "sex role" and "gender identity" and "sex-based stereotype", although that's more a point in their favor, as that's more "cutting through the crap" rather than "failing to understand."

But children are indeed black-and-white in their thinking. So how do you expect them to grasp the subtle and entirely-grey definition of autism, a syndrome which can purportedly manifest as anything from a little to extreme social difficulty, anything from a little to extreme idiosyncratic physical behavior, anything from a little to extreme verbal difficulty, etc etc etc...how do you expect children to understand the word "autism" as meaning anything other than "weirdo" since it seems to have about as broad an application? If children have difficulty with grey areas how could they possibly understand any of this purported nuance? Again, personally, I think the kids are cutting through the chaff here on what "autism" really means, but you are contradicting yourself in plain terms.

C. This is the most pernicious way that Psychologists "prove" their diagnoses. It is an extremely simple formula. It goes like this. with "ADHD" as an example: 1) Find a drug that improves attention span. 2) Define the 10% of kids with the lowest attention-span scores as "attention span deficient." 3) Give these kids the medication that improves attention span. 4) Voila! We have improved attention span in "attention span deficient" kids.

Do you see the trick? The trick is that the treatment improves attention span for everyone. We see this plainly with Ritalin and Adderall which are commonly used to improve attention span by non-diagnosed people in high-pressure settings. (Like the presidency, for example). The treatment *does not only* improve attention span for the most attention-span deficient, it improves attention span for everyone. Thus the fact that it improves attention-span in the 10% most deficient is not "proof" of some real disorder afflicting those people and not others. Attention span is a continuum on which Psychologists have set an arbitrary bar and determined by fiat that people with attention spans below that bar are "deficient" and in need of medication, while people above that bar are "sufficient" and don't get anything.

This is blatantly bizarre as a practice - here is an example of why it's goofy. Let's say we have two kids, Connor and Charles. Connor is a C-student. Charles is a bit cleverer than Connor, but has a bit less ability to pay attention, so Charles is also a C student. Because of his lower attention-span score, Charles is classified as "ADHD" and prescribed Adderall. Now Charles is cleverer and has an equal attention span to Connor, and Charles can make a B. Yay! Bully for Charles.

Yet if Connor also were given Adderall, he would move from a "normal" attention span to an even-better attention span, while keeping his average cleverness. So Connor could be a B student on Adderall as well. Yet only Charles gets to use this drug to get a better score. Why is it only fair for Charles to get this drug and not Connor? That the drug ameliorates inattentiveness directly and uncleverness only indirectly is not a reasonable justification for refusing the drug to Connor. You are saying that because Connor is not inattentive, but merely stupid, available help should be withheld. Again, ludicrous.

D. None of the above deal with the fact that, *even if* the purported biological basis of autism in fact exists, *for which we have no evidence*, it would remain *nonetheless cruel* to inform a child of this, or to inform people who interact with that child likewise.

You are telling this child, very plainly, that he or she is different from 99.9% of the world, that he or she can never & will never really understand other people, that he or she can never & will never really be accepted by other people, that he or she can never & will never be normal. It is never okay to tell that to a child. We understand that even for serious disabilities which we cannot withhold from a child, like blindness - we endeavor to provide blind children with environments like schools for the blind in which they *are* normal.

Let us consider an American family from 1923 instead of 2023. A son comes home to his father and complains of bullying at school. They make fun of the way he talks, they make fun of the clothes he chooses for himself, they make fun of what he chooses to eat, they make fun of everything down to the way he walks and gestures. He comes home to his father and he asks, "Dad, why do the other kids make fun of me?"

The father says, "Son, you are not like the other kids and you never will be. No matter how well you try to get along with the other kids, you will never really be one of them. You will always be different and apart. You cannot understand them. No matter how well you learn to hide yourself, no matter how perfectly you try to speak, no matter how closely you study your manners, you will never be one of them. You will never be normal." Cruel things to say, aren't they? He continues: "Don't be ashamed, son, I am the same way. It is just the unchangeable fate of those born Polish. Our like will never be just folks."

It is completely unsurprising that so many diagnosed-autistic children go on to identify as "queer" - they have already been told their whole lives long that they can never truly be normal.

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Another person who takes a comment and thinks he then knows enough to write a book on the subject. Teachers knew my kids were autistic before I did. What do you think is more harmful - thinking that your character is flawed, or that your brain simply works differently? I know it was absolutely AMAZING to finally understand WHY I was bullied and never got the other kids, had such difficulties with social interactions. Literally like finding out other people could run because they've got two regular feet, and you've got club feet. The idea that NOT telling you that there is an actual basis for your issue is better for you is cruel. Another example - the first time I got glasses. I was 8. I had no idea that other people could SEE. I wasn't not completing my work because I was lazy or stubborn - I COULD NOT SEE THE BLACKBOARD.

Once you understand the problem, then you can find ways that actually work to solve it. Or work around it.

As for psychiatric drugs - you clearly completely missed what I said. I took her into the doctor in the middle of depressive episodes. The woman who first met her at 1 day old - a primary care family practice. In the middle of a manic episode. Medication made those things manageable. She was out of control and unable to function AT ALL without the medication. You know nothing of real mental illness if you think it's worse to treat them than to leave it untreated. She very clearly HAD a huge problem which we then took care of. Not the other way around.

That these things also make people more vulnerable to predators is something we are now understanding is an ADDITIONAL thing to watch out for. They aren't more vulnerable as a result of understanding they have autism or mental illness. It doesn't work like that. I wish I'd known these predators were targeting kids like mine - I might have been better able to protect them.

Don't bother responding again, I'm muting the thread now. I don't have time to respond to another wall of text.

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Oh my.

I know this is so bad for both of you. I am sorry.

I have two daughters but they are a little bit normal-er sort of.

My husband and I are on our own now, both daughters in their 30s with kids and married.

They are that new annoying stupid generation though. I could go on, but I won't

I get it. I am right there next to you.

We raised them the best we can and honestly, do you want either of these girls taking care of you in your old age?

I cared for both of my parents this past 10 years, 86 years old to 99 for daddy.

Mom passed in 2016. Every day, I cared for them, went on adventures, mischief, lots of mischief, laying around on department store display beds for a little rest and a selfie, it was fun.

Those are my best memories, but I had good ones before with my parents

Anyway, kids grow up and make their own dumb decisions. This is not in any way your fault. It might possibly be your older daughters fault.

Anyway, Live your life. Get some good friends, find ones that make you happy. Go swimming every day, or just go have your own stinking fun.

Do not bother your daughters. Remember, you do not need them.

You can throw out an "I love you" now and then, or even a very bland birthday card, nothing mushy.

Do not send any money, and yes indeed, stop paying for stuff. When they leave the house they are not your responsibility anymore.

If you feel like being helpful, you can investigate and share options for those services you were providing for, that now she might need to find through food stamps welfare etc. You are not to blame. No one is going to arrest you for child neglect. She left.

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Nothing else you could have done.

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You and your husband are in a difficult position because it is now "them" against "you". Nearly 33-years-ago, I began my parenthood journey as a single mom to a beautiful little girl. Her father was absent from her life just after she turned 6-months-old as I left him and filed for divorce to protect us both from his anger, temper, and alcoholism. He remained absent and died alone from complications related to alcoholism 17 years later. I was the parent that was present. I was the volunteer Daisy Leader, the Brownie Leader, the Gilr Scout Leader, the T-Ball coach, the soccer referee. My daughter took dance lessons, guitar lessons, cooking classes, and art classes. She participated in karate, basketball, baseball, and volleyball. But it was never enough to fill that hole in her heart because her father was absent, and she suffered from abandonment issues. She was anorexic, a cutter, diagnosed with ADHD, suffered from depression, and HATED me when she was a teenager. She took her pain out on me, her anger, her temper, and became an alcoholic. Ironic, isn't it? She became the same person that made me flee in the night such a long time ago to take refuge at a battered women's shelter. I was the parent that stayed, the parent that nurtured her, the parent that loved her - but then I became her enemy. Counseling, you ask? Years and years for both of us. There were many dark times, and sleepless nights when I did not know if I would ever see my daughter again. I worried that she would end up dead in an alley. Today, my daughter is 5-years clean and sober this month and has a 4-year-old daughter with a man she has been with for over 8-years. She is in school to get her drug/alcohol counseling degree, is on the Dean's List, and has straight "A's". Last month she had to write a paper about her early childhood development, and she called me and read it to me. I was not prepared. She said I was her superhero, that I made her feel safe, secure, wanted and loved and that she had the best childhood. I cried and was so grateful that she remembered the truth. She had to write another paper recently about her teenage development years and this is where it gets interesting; there was no blame put on me, no hatred, no anger. She owned her behavior. She admitted to her pain and admitted to taking it out on me. She was hurting inside because she did not have a father who cared enough about her to get sober and participate in her life. She needed an excuse to cope, and drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. WOW! There is the truth. The point I am trying to make in telling you all of this, is that your daughters are blaming you for their pain, for their confusion, for their inability to see the truth about this cult. They are ganging up on you which makes them feel strong. They want to be in control of your relationship with them because it is the one thing they can control because everything else in their lives is out of control. Are you to blame? Of course not. Neither was I. My advice to you is to hold your ground, draw a line in the sand and stand firm. They must figure out their self-worth themselves, their purpose in life, their future. Cutting the apron string has a whole different meaning now than it did when we were growing up. The trans-cult ideology has brainwashed our children and is teaching them that parents are the bad guys. You will have to let your daughters figure it out for themselves. You must stay strong and focused - let Go and Let God. There is nothing you can say or do to change what is happening. Trust me, I know. Cling to hope that they will grow-up sooner rather than later, that they will hit rock-bottom and make better, wiser choices. Until that time, live your lives and thrive. Give them very little information about what you are doing, keep a journal and take pictures of trips and outings to share with them one day. Tough love, yes, but it does and can work to your advantage. It's OK if you do not get to celebrate birthdays or holidays for the next year or two or three. Cherish the ones you did share and hope for future ones where there will be peace, joy and love. Until your daughters can get "clean and sober" from this gender-cult they will continue to struggle, and your relationship will continue to be flawed. One day I hope and pray that all parents on this sub stack will be able to have a healthy relationship with their estranged child(ren) and to hear the words "you were my superhero". Because it is the truth. Best wishes to you.

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Why wait for a questionable claim to show up on your health insurance? Cut her off now. It should be lost on no one that this LGBTQLMNOP mental illness was nowhere to be found 100 years ago, when getting three meals a day was a challenge for most people.

It may be too late for your daughter to escape the cult but it is not to late to start acting like a parent. No. It is a wonderful word and a complete sentence that can be used to prevent a whole host off undesirable behavior in toddlers. Both of your daughters are acting like toddlers, treat them accordingly.

As far as being her being 'on the spectrum". Stop it. Stop making excuses for your adult child acting like a toddler. Stop simping for your children.

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You're exactly right, the autism/asperger charade is played out as an excuse. If these kids were made to worry more about where their next meal comes from over their next hormone injection, they'd quit this fad faster than a rape victim stops pushing stronger gun control.

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You have done everything humanly possible. They both need a dose if reality. As my husband says about our 18 year old he/them previously our daughter Elise, we’ll just be there to pick up the pieces when (if) it all goes to crap. Good luck to you both and fingers crossed they come to their senses.

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I agree on your decisions 💯

It is so hard but nothing we do or say is going to turn them around.

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While Jason’s comment makes a very valid point about being different from one’s parents and ‘unheard,’ I must take exception to his analogy. Your situation is more as if Jason had insisted that he identified as the owner of a successful

painting company and you’d better put up the cash for capital improvements or he will commit suicide or call you terrible names and cut you off. As you can see these are two very different scenarios—encouraging an entrepreneurial spirit in your child is different from affirming your child’s detachment from reality.

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I saw it about a year ago in an article linked to the SEGM site. I just looked for it and couldn’t find it, however. I’ll link it if I do.

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Thanks, I'll take a look there.

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I just posted the quote and the source below FreeThinker's question. It's from an article published in 2017. It talks about the brain shrinkage but not about the myelin. I'll look for the source of that info too.

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Normally. However, estrogen damages the myelin sheath around nerve cells and accelerates white matter loss tenfold in men.

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Can you unpack that and explain what that means in layman terms, and what also are the long term effects of it all?

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Yes. I found this information on the site GenderHQ (and it's grey matter, not white matter, oops).

Here is a link to the study by John Whitehall (2017): https://quadrant.org.au/magazine/2017/05/childhood-gender-dysphoria-responsibility-courts/#_edn60

The information I was referring to:

Animal studies mentioned above on the effects of androgen deprivation should have raised concerns about similar effects of puberty blockers on the brains of natal boys. The added effect of oestrogen should have been considered because by 2006 it was described in medical literature.

Three studies have compared the effects of cross-sex hormones on the brain before and after treatment. One, in which oestrogen and an added anti-testosterone drug were given to transgendering males, found a reduction in brain “ten times the average annual decrease in healthy adults” after only four months. After a similar time, the brain volume increased in females receiving testosterone.

Other studies[58] confirm that shrinkage of male brains on oestrogen is associated with reduction in the size of grey matter after only six months. Increased size of grey matter in females on testosterone is associated with altered microstructure of neurons[59].

Oestrogen may reduce grey matter in males by inducing apoptosis, or death of neuronal and supporting cells. Testosterone may increase the size of female grey matter by an anabolic effect on molecular components of cells. As brains are chromosomally programmed before birth to respond to specific stimulation of appropriate sex hormones in puberty, there should be no surprise at disruption when the hormone they were expecting has been substituted by one they were not.

There may be other unexpected side effects in males taking estrogen. They appear to have an increased risk for MS, a very serious neurological condition.

Conclusions: We report a positive association (a near seven-fold elevation of rates) between GID and subsequent MS in males. Our findings support a postulated association between low testosterone and MS risk, and highlight a need for further exploration of the influence of feminizing sex hormones on MS risk.T

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Wow thats some crazy 411 to learn, I only wonder why I've heard about it before from anti-tran advocates?

Must not be the most well spread bit of info or they'd be blaring it from every online bullhorn they have.

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Where have you gotten this info? Anything formally written up?

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Thank you for sharing this. What an exhausting ordeal. 100% agree with: "let the stick of reality whomp them upside the head a few times, and hope they survive and learn the right lessons from it." That's all you can do.

On a general note:

1) I wonder . . . If more individuals, once they're 18, had to be 100% responsible for putting a roof over their heads, doing their own laundry, purchasing a car, hitting the gym, paying for medical care, holding down a job - which entails learning to co-exist respectfully with others and being disciplined, etc., I wonder if they'd have any time (or resources) to feed these reality-bending self-obsessions.

Some seem stuck in childhood. Taking on adult responsibilities focuses the mind and causes you to grow up fast. And these responsibilities take up a lot of mental bandwidth. As someone once told me, 75% of life is doing your chores.

2) Way too many therapists 'stir the pot' with the result that people get 'affirmed' in blaming of others. This keeps the client addicted, and coming back for more. I was shocked to find out an old college friend has been in therapy for around 25 years. Ca-ching! She's become addicted to, and dependent on, her counselor. (I know there must be great therapists out there, but caveat emptor.)

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Parents who keep paying for their kids disobedience to simple house rules or splurge large wads of money on them while getting offered steady grants of nothing but heartache in return says more about the parent's poor judgement and lack of common sense than it does about their kid. If anything their behavior explains how their entitlement whore offspring ended up like this in the first place.

It reminds me of an incident I saw once at my gym that illustrated this point exactly. A father had brought his young son in to use the pool and were changing across from me in the locker room. Suddenly this kid who's all of 8 or 9 starts running around banging on all the locker doors and screaming while slaming them open and shut for everybody to get annoyed at. And this father in the meekest, mildest, most low level depleted testosterone fueled voice you can imagine just keeps repeating over and over "Jason, please stop... stop... Jason please... stop... please jason?"

If I hadn't been right across from him I wouldn't have even heard him over the slamming metal, and it's for sure the kid couldn't as he ran around the place. The mother must've been the biggest ballbuster there is to have settled for such a beta male loser.

That kids going to get beaten up bad someday all because his dad never taught him that some people go straight to telling you NO with their fists.

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I’m so sorry you have to deal with all of this. I have two daughters as well - both under 10, neither trans-ID’d - and I can feel how great your pain is.

Your younger daughter seems like she’s almost LARPing or cosplaying a “rejected queer teenager.” I think Gen Z has very little perspective about what does and doesn’t constitute familial rejection. I’m only in my late thirties, but when I was her age, being rejected by your family because of your sexuality - gender identity wasn’t a “thing” among teenagers then - meant that your family made you move out, or refused to speak to you. Maybe sent you off to ex-gay camp, at “best.” There are generations of gay and bi people who would have been ecstatic if “familial rejection” meant a birthday celebration and a reassurance of love.

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There was no sign of any of this with our daughter at age 10. The teen years can be rough.

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The trans movement has worked diligently to program these vulnerable kids with a mentality to perceive the whole world from an "us vs. them" perspective.

Being someone who identifies as trans is then offered as being a powerful way to fight back against a society which the cult leaders teach them will surely reject you for you, if your character turns out to be anything outside the norm of what society expects them to conform to. In fact the biggest common factor amongst all these kids is in the way they see themselves as being outsiders to the realm of society's narrative for what's normal.

So how do you fight back when you're told to believe you're about to be rejected anyway? You find a way to be the one to do it first, by hurting those forces you think are dead set against you already -ie. your parents and other family members who you feel won't accept you.

And obviously they don't come about this conclusion all on their own, they're actively taught by the cult to expect their parents will hate them for being different no matter how they come to identify, whether that be trans, gay or *fill in the blank*. Trans just happens to be the fad for this moment but the principle is always the same for how cults operate to ensnare minds and instill a sense of fear and hate within the person so as to control them by offering itself up as the solution to their anxieties.

These children are primed to have a negative emotional response by being led to believe in the worst outcomes all the time, in everything, till they can only ever see the worst of their parents and ignore any of the good they may offer, nixing all hope from their heads that their family could ever adapt to their child's "abnormalities."

But the worst and most insidious part is how the cult came to realize that they can use this transgender fad as a heat seeking missile to gain revenge against the convervatives and religious nutballs who terrorized them for so long. All the quack conversion therapy forced upon gay people, the anti-sodomy laws and lobotomies done to otherwise healthy individuals because they seen as being under the enthrall of Satan, well they couldn't get back at these admittedly very stupid but powerful men and women in any conventional way. But they could reach the minds of their impressionable children through the use of social media, and through it, turn them against their age old enemies. And that's exactly what they've done. It's really quite ingenious when you think about it.

Vengeance is a hardwired motivational factor built into each and every one of us, some more than others, but it's always there in some measure. The trans cult has simply tapped into it better than most and is pushing its engine to run at overdrive.

Some parents certainly deserve to feel said pain for the hurt they've caused others through their intransigence. The kids don't but they do.

But most parents here are just unfortunate bystanders suffering the collateral damage of a campaign that's expanded far beyond its original scope and target, and is now running completely out of control.

I hate to say it but this genie's out of the bottle and has no chance of ever being recorked and put back into his lamp.

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This is absolutely spot on. This weekend, the kids both did their final blowup with us, post cutting off the insurance and the phone. The sheer level of vitriol and hatred was unbelievable. And straight out of the trans playbook. They truly believe that we do hate them and that we never loved them, that everything was always conditional.

"No, kids. We wanted you to be good people. To get an education, develop your talents, and be self-supporting. To that end, yes, you got lectured, sometimes. Mostly we tried to teach. I am sure we weren't nearly good enough at listening. At leading you to think through things for yourselves. We did yell at you, probably a lot more than we ever should have, and we regret that, and have apologized many times. Your brother actually caught a whole lot more of that than either of you two, and yet he still loves us. Go figure.

"But neither one of you can ever forgive anything. You both carry grudges worse than anyone I ever met. But the ones you hurt by that is each of you."

If you don't mind, I'd love to share what you wrote on my Facebook page.

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And yes feel free to share it on your social media.

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That's actually quite smart of the cult to say to the kids that their parent's love was always somehow conditional... it gives a kid the sense that they had some established form of control put over them at a young age but in a way that cuts out all the love for why they worked to instill that discipline to begin with.. so the child can learn right from wrong in order to help them achieve success out of life from the failures that set us back.

I'll keep that conditional exaggeration in mind, see if I dwell on it whether I might come up with an answer for it.

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The "made you move out, or refused to speak to you" trope was always mostly media-generated. But now, trans-identifying kids are being actively encouraged by their online community to physically and emotionally separate from their families of origin regardless of their relationship with them.

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That's actually not correct, if you ever were around or go study the gay explosion of the 70's and 80's when the gay community was rising out of the shadows, a large percentage of teenage runaways reported that they were kicked out of their homes because their parents found out somehow they were gay. Mostly this was concentrated in the bible belt too which tells you a lot about the mentality of the religiously orthodox as extremists in their beliefs.

The trans community does it differently though and treats all parents like they were the orthodox, which not coincidentally is the same mentality of a racist and how their kind also act towards any hated out group. To the cult, all parents are orthodox religious and they react to them as such, regardless of the parent's actual perception to their worldview.

It is smart move to win over the mentally vulnerable and weak, and just because that's evil it can't be denied as also being a smart strategy. The proof of that is in its extremely effective outcome.

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Yes, it actually is true. Your beliefs are based on what you read in sympathetic leftie media, who swallow whole every single excuse that these kids make for their choices.

No kid on the street is going to admit they ran away from home unless they have a sob story to attach to it.

People on the street are addicts and hustlers and BS artists who learn to sell a sob story in order to get support. It's understandable, but it's also naive to believe them on the details.

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Respectfully I'll disagree.

Those kids weren't shy about admitting when they were physically or sexually abused if that was happening. But to admit being gay is something you don't fake, back then it was like a third form of abuse at a time the gay community was so much more isolated.

Some may have lied about being gay, but strong patterns of the homeless found in such university and support group studies of the issue aren't going to get away with that much fabrication, especially when studies of back then were done with far less bias.

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Interesting that you're responding as if I'm saying they're faking being gay when it's clear I'm saying that most of the ones who the media portray as having been "kicked out of the house" actually weren't. Also some were kicked out but for different reasons.

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I felt every word to my very core. Your need for boundaries against what your children are doing to you makes the most sense. Our very souls that these children chip away at need to be protected. Blessings to you and your husband.

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Your hearts are broken, I am so sorry. It is a cult with brainwashing and thier own twisted creeds. My heart hurts for yours

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I’m so proud of you. This is all hard. These are extremely difficult decisions that you’re/we’re making. We recently had to make the decision to cut our son off financially, stop paying tuition, remove insurance, etc. I hate it, and I wonder if it’s the right decision every day but we cannot support him, harming himself in these irreversible ways. I’m so grateful you and your husband have each other to love and hold onto. I send you strength, love, and support.

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I literally could have written this article except older daughter took 2 of my daughters, one trans, one non-binary. They all live together in one dysfunctional house. Oldest daughter is still married to a man. They do speak to us but my texts to the 18 year old asking how the week went go unanswered and I wonder also am I cut off and just don’t know it. But the money for college and to help buy a car are accepted. College classes I help pay for include brainwashing classes on social justice. Reach out to me if you wish. We have too much in common, sadly.

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You're actually helping them to transition by how you make your happiness dependent on their reaction to you through your money.

Your desperation to keep them in your life is sad, but also that you feel you don't deserve any better treated because you can't see yourself deserving anything beyond what little you have left in your relationship with them.

Just realize you're a punching bag, and if that makes you unhappy, you need to look in the mirror to see the person throwing the punches.

Is this post your admission that that's all you're worth?

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Omg, please stop with the cash and the tuition and the car-buying! I'm sorry but those things won't keep them from going further down the cult rabbit hole or get them to come back to you. They need to learn that human relationships are a two-way street. How utterly disrespectful of them!

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Eh, tying financial support to personal relationship isn't a great idea either.

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